Liking his brother?

[Skittle Flavored]

I wasnt sure weather to put this here, or somewhere else..But i have a question for all you older siblings.

Ok, so i've been hanging out with my best friend, and we are pretty close. And i've noticed recently how cute his brother has gotten. And me and my friend are always talking about people we like, and i mentioned what i though about his brother. And occasionally, he kinda stops talking to me, or the quality of his texts goes way down *By that i mean, going from paragraphs to 1 or 2 words* Im not sure if it bothers him or not...

For all you older siblings, does it bother you when one of your friends says your older brother or sister is cute?

[Zero Beat]

ok... well i dont have any bros or sis's. but if i did... it probly would bother me, but id just tell u to keep ur hands to urself XDDD

[Skittle Flavored]

Haha, well he hasn't told me that YET!

[Alternative]

i don't have a brother , but if i did and this happened , it'd be kinda weird a little , and well i think you should talk to him about it , and tell him if it bothers him or something . hope i helped :)

[Donkey]

I wouldn't find it weird, but that's me. He might and that's him.

Talk to him about it.

[Beautiful Obsession]

well when my best mate ses.. Your brothers really fit.. i automaticly go .. eww gross!! even though im a spitting image but its just like a reflex i guess. she was joking.. ( well i hope) but if she went out wiv him i would find it really hard hanging around with her and talking to her. Think about it. if you went out with your best mates brother, she wudnt want to be hearing about your first kiss etc.. i would think this out carefully!!

[Sceneboy612]

Well i have an older sister, and even though we never get along, i can relate to his dislike on the subject. Your friend might feel jealousy, distrust, and he might also feel that you are using him to get to his brother. But if you talk it out with him, it might be able to make things better with you two.

[Jonathan M.]

im kinda in the same position but its not really gay its just i like hangin out with him more and he notices it.he gets mad somtimes but weve been friends longer than i hav than his bro so just ask him bout it see if it messes with him im the oldest out of three but my bro's to young to really have a gf but it probably would mess with me a bit

[byee]

I think this is a sexual statement you're making, and maybe that's why your friend is reacting to it the way he is.

My (younger) brother is very 'cute' (handsome, actually), so when my friends meet him, if their eyeballs work properly, they often acknowledge that to me. But, it's just an observation in their case, it's objective, and I make nothing of it, because it's just am accurate reflection of reality.

In your case, maybe it came out as a sexual reference, that you were attracted to him sexually. So, you're not so much talking about something fairly objective, but highly subjective. It's OK to recognize male beauty, but if you're saying it in a way that indicates it's arousing to you, you cross a line. And, in so doing, you also reveal that you're gay. If he was unaware of that, then he could be reacting to that info, which is making him uncomfortable. And, he could be reacting to some protective instinct towards his brother.

You might want to clarify with him what you meant, and down play the sexual (subjective) part, and emphasize the appearance (objective) part, and learn from this that you need to be very careful what you reveal to those who are unsuspecting.

[Skeln]

Yeah, many people could take that the wrong way. I agree with Sam.

While I don't have any siblings, I can see how that might be akward for your friend, especially if he thought you meant sexually. Especially when it's a younger siblings, the older sibling might feel protective about them (actually, they should feel protective about them) and yeah, for some they might see this as crossing the line and go into protective mode for awhile.

[INFERNO]

I do not have any siblings, however, my cousin (around 16-17) and myself (19) tend to hang out (nothing sexual, usually we go with her friends or my friends or both), and I tend to get mistaken for being about 16-17 years old also even if I'm by myself (by my looks, pain in the ass if I go to a club or somewhere even with ID). Anyways, I've been told by others that my cousin is attractive and I don't care. It's her life, not mine.

If I had a sibling, I assume I'd have some amount of bias, both for him/her being family and a social bias. Ideally, I'd do what I do when people tell that to me about my cousin: not care and rarely do I tell them I'm her cousin. I don't find it disgusting, I don't find her attractive, and so, I'd be fine with it. Of course, things get different if they sexually assault/rape her.