viculous
April 6th, 2009, 09:19 PM
hi...
i'm a new person here.
anyway, I know why I cut ... I have such POWERFUL emotions and even though I make music, I still have no ways to calm myself besides smoking to relax, which helps; but anyway today I was too overwhelmed and cut for the first time in a long time.. i made the accident though of cutting too deep and I got a huge gash ! it was nasty, though it didn't even hurt, which was the surprising thing.
but the probably most surprising thing was how, after it was done, i felt completely fine--all the angst in me was gone, and should be gone for a while. feels like the deeper the wound, the more that goes away .. though I do not intend to make this a habit! it's just that I couldn't do anything else to get rid of the pain in my chest.
its nice to see others like me, that turn to this, though of course I'm not condoning it but it 'does' work and may technically be better than smoking ..
i went to the hospital and got the gash taken care of, so I won't have a nasty scar. :yes: i'm just glad they bought that it was on accident--anyway it really was, it was the first (and last time) that I had cut so deep it was a flesh wound not just skin ...
anyway just had to get this off my chest ..
i'm a new person here.
anyway, I know why I cut ... I have such POWERFUL emotions and even though I make music, I still have no ways to calm myself besides smoking to relax, which helps; but anyway today I was too overwhelmed and cut for the first time in a long time.. i made the accident though of cutting too deep and I got a huge gash ! it was nasty, though it didn't even hurt, which was the surprising thing.
but the probably most surprising thing was how, after it was done, i felt completely fine--all the angst in me was gone, and should be gone for a while. feels like the deeper the wound, the more that goes away .. though I do not intend to make this a habit! it's just that I couldn't do anything else to get rid of the pain in my chest.
its nice to see others like me, that turn to this, though of course I'm not condoning it but it 'does' work and may technically be better than smoking ..
i went to the hospital and got the gash taken care of, so I won't have a nasty scar. :yes: i'm just glad they bought that it was on accident--anyway it really was, it was the first (and last time) that I had cut so deep it was a flesh wound not just skin ...
anyway just had to get this off my chest ..