Why do you cut?

[Froger]

I am am doing research for myself since I want to understand why people do that.
Why cutting is so special, what so magic in that form of self harm?
Pain from razor cuts is not so strong to be something worth even talking about it does not hurt, but does lots of damage and leaves scars.

Do you hate your body and want to make it ugly?

Or you just want to feel pain, see blood and other similar stuff unrelated to damage?

[Sapphire]

I hate this question.

Everyone has slightly different reasons for it.
Some people find that it helps to "ground" themselves when they are dissociating. Others find it to be a valuable release of pent up and overwhelming emotions. It can be used as a form of punishment if the individual has done something they deem to be bad. While other people use it to show themselves that they can feel something when they are in a state of numbness.
I'm sure that there are reasons I have missed, but you get the idea.

I did it for a whole host of reasons. The most prominent one for me was to release the emotions that were all pent up inside. Punishment was another reason as to why I used to do it. There have been a few periods in my life where I have cut because I was feeling numb.
The blood and the pain are satisfying and separate cutting/scab picking from other ways of dealing with emotions. But, they are not a reason why I do it.

[Triceratops]

I do it because it gives me a sense of control and relaxation that I don't already have in my life.

Slitting through my skin with an ice cold razorblade soothes my pain, anger and hatred.
I would cut because I would convince myself I deserved punishment and I would be cruel to myself due to self-hatred.
When I cut I literally take my despair and emotional pain out on myself, drastically.

[Crazychild]

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[Destiny&Desire]

I do it because (in my opinion), there's nothing else to do.

When I get really worked up/stressed about something and I just need to forget it, I can cut and it'll take my mind off everything (which I guess is classed as pushing the problems to the back of my mind, which I shouldn't really be doing...).

I think the whole "moment" of it just distracts me for a bit...

[Skeln]

Well, their are alot of reasons why people cut. As said before, it can be used to relieve anger and a bunch of other emotions. Or, it can be used as a form of punishment to ones self. For others, (like one of my old friends) they cut because they want to prove something. My friend cut his girlfriends name into his arm (well, not really cut more like scarred with a paper clip) to prove his love for her. (She dumped him after she learned about this).

[Beautiful Obsession]

tbh u shudnt really be asking that question. Everyone has differant reasons for it, like abuse, depression, mental illnesses etc.. u dont know how it feels until u do it. so sayin it dont hurt.. its not actually true.. some parts of ur body it does and some parts it doesnt. its not that everyone wants to do it. its the only way to make u feel good about yourself because u cant talk to anybody about it.

[SingASadSong4408]

I hate this question, SO MUCH.

It's like most people expect for there to be a solid, concrete, eternally correct reason to self harm. Fact: THERE ISNT.

Cutting is personal, an exchange of pain that people can control. Take it from someone who's been there done that. There's no concrete reason. Maybe someone feels sad and needs something to take their mind away from the emotional pain. Or if they have no control over their life, they can control the pain. Everyone has their own reasons, and unless you've been there, dont try to understand.

Sorry if I came across a bit harsh, its been a rough day.

[Miss Punk]

I hate this question too, because I can't answer it.

I guess I started because it got rid of all the pain that was inside, and for some reason cutting made me feel better. I can't explain it though.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I haven't followed through with cutting yet...and I am trying really hard not too...but it has been really tempting lately and I can see why people do it. Everyone usually has a different reason for doing it. For me though...the reason why I have almost followed through with it is because I am so emotionally overwhelmed...I have been faced with quite a few unfortunately tough experiences these last couple years...and I hid the pain for awhile...but now it really hurts...I can't hide it any longer...but I can't express it either...so I have thought about cutting...and it seems reasonable even though I should not do it. It seems reasonable because I am looking for a way to just release everything that I am feeling and somehow this just makes sense...somehow...it's difficult for other people to understand unless they have actually been in this situation themselves...trust me I have been on both sides...within the last year actually...so I think unless you have really been through this yourself your never really going to know the thoughts that run through peoples heads when they do it...your never going to really understand why they do it...but personally...I am glad that you haven't done it yourself...don't...as I have been told many times...IT's NOT WORTH IT!

[cool person]

Unlike alot of the posters, i think this is a really good question to be asked. There are SO MANY threads where people complain that kids at school etc are joking about cutting or perants "just don't get it". He can we, as cutters, expect this to change if when people inquire about it...it is greeted with " I HATE THIS QUESTION" echod over and over again. We need is more people asking this. Only then will it no longer have to be such a difficult thing to talk about, and thus stop.

As for why I personally cut. I do it for a veriety of reasons. Sometimes to punish myself for being such a fuck-up or a loser, or for acting stupid or wierd.
Most of the time though, it to deal with pent up feelings, or depression. It releases the pain, and makes it so I can breath again...I know even when I'm doing it that I shouldn't, but sitting around feeling horrible, unfocused and sometimes mildly suicidal for days just wears me down.

[Miss Punk]

Hey, cool person, personally although I know a lot of other people have said the same thing, it's not because I want to ignore the question that I would say I hate it, it's just that I find it hard to define the real reason I cut. I really liked your answer though, when you say 'so you can breathe again'. I find it hard to put things into words like that.

[Sunshine Girl]

thats a hard question.
But i like how Cool Person put it 'so you can breathe again'.
pretty much sums it up.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I don't hate the question...but I know it's challenging for some people to answer...but you know what having someone ask you that question might really help you realize why you are doing it in the first place...because I know the first time someone asked me that it was hard...because I didn't really know but once I stopped and thought about it...I realized a little bit of why I have thought about doing it. Even though questions are sometimes hard...they can help too...

[cool person]

Why, thank you :yes:

I think part of the reason alot of us turned to cutting in the first place,atleast in part, is we coudn't really express what we were feeling in words.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

My problem was that I couldn't express what I was feeling at all...I still can't and I still I haven't quite figured things out yet. That's why I still have lots of thoughts of cutting...This month has been really bad...I have thought about it more than 4 times...before this month I hadn't thought about it once....

[cool person]

Please. Keep it that way. I know resisting the urge is hard. But take it from someone who failed to resist, you will regret it. One trick I've found helpful, is to keep my razors in hard to get to places. Mine are in a locked box in the closet...having a small delay in between the urge to cut, and the availity of a tool, is sometimes enough to calm down a little bit, and think.

Please don't start. Its waaay harder to stop once you have

[triplethreat40]

cutting is like my *uber nerdy reference alert* vulcan nerve pinch. it just makes all the hellish swirling uncontrollable emotions go away and gives me a moment of icy clarity.

[Sapphire]

Tbh, I don't hate the question itself - it's just the number of times that I see it here.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

The problem for me...is that I can't get rid of or lock up the very things that I am tempted to cut with. I think my mom would get a little suspicious if all the kitchen knives just disappeared...or if every razor we had in the house just disappeared. Today I have had a really hard time resisting.

[cool person]

ahh yes that is a slight problem. I really just count something as Cutting when I do it with my razor, and do alot of it. Sometimes i do some minor scratches etc, I find it helps me resist doing anything major.

Me to....carrying a razor in my pocket as we speak.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

There is just no possible way for me to get away from it all. I feel like I may just have a breakdown at any moment because there is so much emotional pain that I am feeling right now.

[Miss Punk]

There is just no possible way for me to get away from it all. I feel like I may just have a breakdown at any moment because there is so much emotional pain that I am feeling right now. I really admire the way you encourage everyone in this forum, you show so much wisdom, and that means you've got it in you to do amazing things, don't give up. Remember we're all here for you. Take care xx

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I know how much people need encouragement..and they often don't get it. I know I don't get encouragement at home at all...and it really does make a difference...I am wise because I have struggled and I have known so much sadness. I have been through so much, and going through as many deaths as I did has left be with a different outlook on life. It's hard for me to imagine doing something amazing because it I feel like I have done nothing great in my life really. It would be so easy to just give it all up now...but I am going to try and Stay strong.

[Miss Punk]

Please do. You're doing something amazing already by giving people advice and support on here and not giving in to your thoughts, and there are many other things in store for you that will come round if you let them. It's so worth it

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I just really want to feel better, but I don't know if I'll ever feel better.

[Miss Punk]

Hey, you will, I can tell you from experience, even when you can't see things ever getting better and you think there is no future for you, you will come out on the other side and you will be so glad that you held on. I nearly killed myself because I couldn't see anything good anymore, but I know now that it would have been so stupid because there have been things that I'm glad I'm still around for. You will feel better, I promise! x

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

Several people I have talked to have said that. But sometimes it's so hard to hang on because it seems like I have been going through this for forever and it's hard to imagine yourself making it to the otherside...( lol this sounds like one of them jokes where they go...why did the chicken cross the road-to get to the otherside...) lol...anyways...I know I just got to stick this out...and that things have to get better soon.

[cool person]

Remember that even if they don't always do the best job of expressing it your parents care deeply about you.

You have wisdom far behond your years. For one, you have helped me alot....

One thing I have found helpful is writing, just writing what you are feeling or what ever comes into your mind. I'm not exactly sure why, but I find it really helps

[cool person]

I was just thinking ( something I do waaay too much of) and I found a rather interesting trend in my cutting and i was wondering if anyone can relate.
When I feel really horrible and and go mildy crazy and have a burning desire to cut: I manage to resist the urge because I fight back really hard.
However later, when I feel mildy triggered, or not at all, I end up cutting. I'm not realyl sure why this is, I think mabye because I kinda catch myself off guard so I don't resist as much. The only other thing I can think of, is my will power is drained for ften lieing in bed for hours upon hours at night with a razor against my skin and silently screaming, pulling hair biting myself hiting the wall etc...that I just don't have enough left to fight back.

In a way I think this is a good thing, because if I cut when I'm really upset I would probably cut quite deep and all over. Because I often end up cutting when I am already in a slightly calmer state, I have managed not to do any too major cuts (the worst time I came close to needing stiches, but luckily I didn't) and have thus far kept all my cutting to one spacific place: the part of my wrist which is covered by my watch..

I'm not quite sure why I put this here, but I feel to self-concious and unworthy to start a whole new thread...so yeah

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

Well I got a question a minute...is there are trend or one certain reason that triggers you to cut? I am kind of been thinking about what's going on with me...and I am trying to figure out if it is really one thing that triggers me or if it's because of a number of reasons. I think it may be a number of reasons that trigger me but I know of one thing that just makes me want to cut no matter what. So it could be all just related to this one thing.

I'm glad I could help you :) The wisdom comes from being forced to grow up so quickly, and seeing death gives you new perspectives on things. I love writing too. I am actually writing a book right now...It's called "Pieces of My Heart" and I have a couple other books that I want to start writing yet. I really want to write one about my aunt. But it's been kind of a hard book to start because it hurts to even think about her..
I have been writing in a journal though a lot lately. Sometimes when I put things down on paper, I'll read them later and I can figure out what's really bothering me...because there are so many thoughts that are running through my head I can't just seem to work through one but when I write them out I can. There are things that I can write that I can not say...because some things are just too hard for me to say

[cool person]

Yes! "Sometimes when I put things down on paper, I'll read them later and I can figure out what's really bothering me...because there are so many thoughts that are running through my head I can't just seem to work through one but when I write them out I can."

Put perfectly :)

Yeah, that is one thing I find writing helps with...figuring out what exactly triggers cutting. I have a small list, not complete yet though, I was going to start a journal, but then I realized I was starting to lose control of my cutting and that I really needed to stop... So it been like 3 or so weeks of just intermittent cutting instead, of every other day or so.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

That's pretty good...I think I may journal tonight...I just got some really bad news...and it has caused a lot of emotional pain...from the past and right now... things are not looking too good.

[Miss Punk]

I started writing a journal too, and I am normally no good at writing or keeping up a journal, but recently I've had so much going through my head that it's really helped. It gives me a lot of clarity to write things down. Sometimes I write when I feel like I need to cut. It doesn't really stop me from doing it. Sometimes I only write after I've done it. But I think it helps.

[evodose]

instant relaxation.

[cool person]

Sometimes I find writing makes me even more upset, that is kinda what happened last night. The more I wrote, the madder I got at myself and I ended up cutting.

[Beautiful Obsession]

there are a number of reasons people self harm but i do it because i feel urges to do it and it helps calm me down. also other resaons such as abuse and eatin disorders.
i guess just seeing the blood calms youdown x

[Miss Punk]

Sometimes I find writing makes me even more upset, that is kinda what happened last night. The more I wrote, the madder I got at myself and I ended up cutting.

I've done that before too, I was fine and then I started writing and just thinking for too long about some of the stuff was making me really worked up and I ended up cutting too. Today, after yesterday was one of my worst experiences with cutting yet, I still haven't written anything because I don't feel like it will help at all and I already feel bad enough about what happened. I know it will just make me want to hurt myself again.

[cool person]

I'm sorry yesterday was so hard, but always remember every day brings with it a chance to start fresh.

When and if you feel like talking, we are hear( punn intended) to listen

[dstnyisurs]

Me? The answer changes every time I find this question in forums, so bear with me.
When I'm in a mood to cut.. it's like either I am so extremely angry at myself, or I'm so sad I don't know what to do. I can't sleep, so I cut. And when I am so sad, I call it "the pit" because you're like in a pit where you can't get out it seems, and in the end it's just easier to stay there because getting out is so hard, and even if you get a few minutes of sunshine, it all ended no matter what and left you off worse for wear. So I cut when I'm in the pit.
Like when you cut, it's like the part of your being devoted to self preservation dies (paraphrased from my friend Jake). You then get to the point where it's like, how can I hurt myself this time, how far can I go? Because in the end, the pain feels good. I know, wierd.. but it does. It's so much easier to just cut, and feel the endorphine rush and see the blood then get better. The endorphine rush is so powerful, and the pain feels so good, so fresh, so ... nice. It's amazing how it feels, and it is so addicting. It works. It makes you feel relief and lifts the load off.... I guess.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I was trying to figure out a way to explain this to one of my friends today...she's like how can the pain feel good. Well the best I could come up with was that cutting was a way for me to physically feel the pain that I felt emotionally. It was a way for me to relieve that emotional pain I was in. The emotional pain that I couldn't allow myself to feel. I didn't know how to explain it to her...it's just something that has to be experienced to be understood.

[Miss Punk]

I was trying to figure out a way to explain this to one of my friends today...she's like how can the pain feel good. Well the best I could come up with was that cutting was a way for me to physically feel the pain that I felt emotionally. It was a way for me to relieve that emotional pain I was in. The emotional pain that I couldn't allow myself to feel. I didn't know how to explain it to her...it's just something that has to be experienced to be understood.

That's very well put. I would describe it similarly, the physical pain helps relieve the emotional pain, and also distracts from it, and also sometimes all it's doing is satisfying the wish to hurt yourself. Seeing the blood is like seeing all the bad things come out of you, getting rid of the hurt.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

Exactly...but anyone that hasn't cut before wouldn't understand that...they are just like pain won't get rid of pain...and in a way they are kind of right because the pain does come back again...and cutting in the end only really does cause you more pain.

[Miss Punk]

That's true. Even when some nights I can only sleep when I feel I'm done making enough damage to make myself feel better, the pain always comes back sooner or later. That's why this cycle is so hard to escape. One thing I can barely understand anymore is other people's shock at cutting who have never cut before. I know I would hate to see a friend do it to themselves but when it comes to myself, I'm not phased anymore.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I'm still kind of in a shocked state that I did it. Because this is so not like me to do something like this. Usually when I see blood I pass out...but this did not phase me when I cut...I'm mad at myself...that I let myself go this far...and the cycle continues...I feel bad I cut....I feel good...then I am mad..then I cut...It's a never ending cycle.

[Miss Punk]

It's hard to beat that feeling you need to go further every time. Surface cuts stop satisfying and you feel like going deeper and deeper. I wish I'd stopped after the first time I did it, because now it's just so hard.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

It's hard to stop after the first though...Once you start it's like you cannot stop.

[GiZzLe]

I did it because it releves pressure that builds up from stress. It did a lot for me, and to see the blood rushing does something to me. I feel relaxed when i do it, it made me feel a lot better. But I dont do it anymore, I quit about four months ago, itz hard but i deal with it and I let it out by punching my friend (he lets me do it).

[Agent]

I cut when my parents fight and I can´t take it anymore.

[FurtureMA]

When I was younger i did it because i knew that it put me in control, like from when I was about 7-9 i had an extreme fear of things being out of my control.

Now I do it because it makes me feel good, thats sounds so strange but when i'm cutting I feel happy. And I do still do it when things get out of my control and I guess when I feel emotion- I don't trust emotion, it lies.

XxMx

[Char_x]

Well it started off because i had so much self-hatred against myself. I still do but i cut for other reasons as well. I always feel like im not good enough, my relationship with certain people isnt the same anymore so that gets me down at times, im failing at college, i get upset so easily like litrally the slightest thing can make me cry, its so annoying and i deal with these things by cutting. No one understands me so by cutting i feel like i have control and like for that moment in time nothing and no one can bother me, its just me and the nail scissors or razor which wont let me down unlike other things. It just feels so good at the time to have that release.

[sam i am]

I used to do it but when im done with my cancer treatment im going back it's hard to keep it in....and i do it because it relaxes me and the pain that people ask if i feel feels like heaven to me and the main reason i do so is because i don't like my self all because of one thing that happen

[1_21Guns]

It depends on the person, some say its just to know they're still alive others say its to realease the pain and anger they're already feeling and so on. I myself dont atchh know completely why I still cut, maybe i'm on eof the people who need to know they're still alive at the end of it all >_>

[ackmedsgirl666]

I do it because seeing all of the blood and such calms me down and makes me feel self remorse and i feel guilty but at the same time i feel good

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I do it because I can't handle things anymore....I do it because I am so stressed out and in so much pain that I need a way to release it all...

[IanMilo]

I did it because i never beloged in a group and i was an outsider but recently (2 years ago) i met the girl of my dreams but right now we are only friends but her smile keeps me from cutting so good luck to all!!!!