A Joke

[Sapphire]

I'm in a bad place. Very, very bad place.
Want to cry all the time. Always furiously angry. Losing the will to do things. Trying to push people away. Can't see why there are people who want to know me. I'm horrible, worthless and ugly. I'm a joke. I'm a fucked up joke of a person.
Just want to be alone. Just want to self destruct.

[Hyper]

Well I'm late as usual...Timezones and broken CPUs

But I hope you feel better.. You and I both know that, what you said is not true :P

[Sapphire]

Keep missing each other lol

Honestly, I'm not convinced that its not true but it's nice to see that someone disagrees.

[Hyper]

Keep missing each other lol

Honestly, I'm not convinced that its not true but it's nice to see that someone disagrees.

:mad:

Atleast your honest

[Sapphire]

I'm falling to pieces. Slept most of the day because I was too weak to do anything due to not eating properly. Have eaten since and been forced to stay awake - the light has been on all pm to make sure I don't sleep.

Not sure how I'll cope tomorrow. Have a mock test first thing in the morning, a lecture and have an assessment session with a new counsellor. That's more than I've done for what feels like ages and means I have to eat even if I'm not hungry and talk with people. I just want to crawl into a dark corner and be left there.

[Beautiful Obsession]

ur not ugly, wortheless or a joke, and ur not fucked up..x

[Sapphire]

Thanks for the sentiment, Hollie.
Having trouble believing any of it. But thank you nonetheless.

[Sapphire]

I feel myself slipping. I want to do something but I know that it won't make me feel any good. Not even for a second. Still, it is pulling me. I'm getting stupidly frustrated because I can't do it.

I'm growing tired of constantly being torn in two different directions. One good and one bad. I want them both and neither of them.

Will I ever be "fixed"? Will I ever be able to react normally to normal situations? Will I ever feel as if I know who I am?

[Narwhale343]

Why would you think you're ugly? DOn't let people bring you down. Or yourself for that matter. Every person in their own way is beautiful.

[Buggahh]

I know the exact same feeling. I'm sure you arent ugly or worthless noone is.. i havent seen what you look like but its not the looks that matter its what is on the inside and im sure you are beautiful both inside and out.

[Beautiful Obsession]

seriously ur not bbe.ur havin a hard time atm. Talk 2 sum1 bout it. It shud help..X

[Beautiful Obsession]

bdw Pm me ya wanna x