Parents Drinking Around Children

[Atonement]

What are your views on it? do you feel strongly about it? At what point is it okay to drink aroudn your kids?

I am referring to, an adult either drinking in house, or going to a bar.restaurant and getting near shit-faced with a child around them. Of course take in variables such as how much drinking, the age of the child, and if there are alternatives. Go for it.

[MysticalBurrito]

Anytime i go to a party with my family my relitives get shit-faced and i hate it
I personally think its wrong to get drunk in front of ANY children no matter the age

[INFERNO]

Well the kids could learn via observational learning that drinking could be good to do if they see the parent somehow benefiting. Depending on their age, they may not understand what alcohol's effects are and how it is to be drunk or shit-faced. I say, if you're going to drink infront of the kids, do it in moderation, such as maybe 1 beer at a dinner or something like that. You're not getting drunk or anything, you're not getting any noticable kick out of it. But getting completely shit-faced, I think may depend on how often. If you had a horrible day, say, you got fired, picked your kid up from school, had a fight with a friend, so you get drunk. If it's for that reason and it's not a common thing you do, ideally find better coping methods but I don't think it'd do too much damage, providing of course you don't get violent, act like an utter fool or something else.

I think there are alternatives to getting shit-faced infront of the kid, such as going home, having a nap or some sleeping pills, something like that where there's no harm done.

If the kid sees their parent(s) always getting shit-faced, then it seems like it's a norm. Getting drunk is acceptable because they don't see anything else that much.

In the end, if it's casual social drinking where you're not drunk, and it doesn't happen very often, the kid understands what alcohol does, etc..., then I think that's fine.

[theOperaGhost]

I don't really know...my parents almost never drank although many other relatives drank and a few are alcoholics. It's alright to a point in my opinion.

[Random_oso06]

well when i was younger we went to parties with my whole family i think mostly for quinceniena (i don't know it i spelled it right) but i went to a lot of those and my dad and my uncles always drink i seen them but i really don't care it isn't really news to me i don't hate it or like it i just don't give

[bevans]

There is nothing wrong about parents drinking when the kids are around as long as parents don't get drunk. Most kids look up to their parents as examples, as models. Being drunk in front of the kids will make kiddos think that it is alright to drink too much and get wasted.

[Perseus]

To an extent, I eman if my dad got drunk while we were at a restaurant I'd get pissed off at him, and any parent that gets drunk in front of their child needs to lay off the alchol.

[Sapphire]

As long as there is a decent ratio of sober adults to children then I think it is ok.

I think things change when the child becomes a teenager. The need for sober adults is still there, but it is lower than before. Even allowing them a drink of two is ok. Better that they have the first experiences of alcohol in small quantities and under adult supervision than hanging out at a park and getting rat-arsed with friends.

[bbychop]

I usually hang out around an older crowd, so I have been around parents who drink around there children.

In one instance, my friend was eighteen and her son was maybe six months old. Her boyfriend (now husband) had to take care of their son because she was almost dropping him. If he wouldn't have been there, she could have really hurt the baby.
In another, which happens more frequent, I go upstairs with a friend of mine's cousins (and dad) and we usually get pretty trashed. They have an almost three month old son (and much older than the two in the first scenario). I have never once seen them in anyway almost harm their son. The girl (who is also a now friend) always goes on about how when her husband drinks, her son can tell what he is doing and needs to stop. He gets a little more drunk than we do, like he starts at ten in the morning.
And I have always felt guilty after drinking in front of both of their sons.

I suppose the term "drink responsibly" works well in this scenario.

What most parents don't think of is "What if they see me now and what if they start when they are teenagers?" Most parents try to tell their kids "Don't drink! It's bad for you!" but once a child, teenager, sees their parents doing it, they could believe that it is alright for them to do as well. HYPOCRITICAL.

I am not saying anything bad about any parents. Because my mother used to drink in front of me to the point where I swore to God I wouldn't drink but now, I'm an eighteen year old self-proclaimed alcoholic.

Wow, I am at a loss for words.

[Patchy]

any kid under 10 doesn't deserve to see there parents off there face.

It depends on the situation in the house alone with your kid, I wouldnt get off my face but if Im with lots of people and out at lets say a b-day I would drink a bit more. Thats if I ever have kids lol.

U just have to remember they'll copy you so if you get shit faced they might copy you

[pizzamon]

I don't think there's a problem with parents drinking around kids as long as they're not getting wasted and they explain to them that it's for grown-ups.

[Talia]

As long as it's not any sort of heavy drinking, and the parents let the kids know it's not juice or something that they can have I think it's fine. Even giving them a tiny sip too, because then they wont think they need to go trying it on their own. And they also might really not like the taste so they'd wait longer before trying it again.

[INFERNO]

any kid under 10 doesn't deserve to see there parents off there face.

It depends on the situation in the house alone with your kid, I wouldnt get off my face but if Im with lots of people and out at lets say a b-day I would drink a bit more. Thats if I ever have kids lol.

U just have to remember they'll copy you so if you get shit faced they might copy you

I agree with most of this but why exactly any kid under 10? I'm curious for your reasons.

[Camazotz]

It's alright in proportion. It's okay to have more alcohol on a holiday like New Years, but if parents daily get drunk in front of their kids, I would consider it wrong. It's fine if the parents drink a glass of wine with dinner, but chugging bottles of beer while watching football is pathetic, and setting a bad example for your kids. As long as the parents aren't too drunk they can't drive or finish a sentence, drinking alcohol around kids is okay.

[byee]

Kids learn what they see. And what they see determines what they accept as responsible and respectful authority.

If parents drink to excess, not only do kids learn that kind of thing is OK, but perhaps more damaging, I think they experience their parents as irresponsible and lacking credibility. Falling down drunk, slurring words, or generally acting in ways that are inconsistent with being a trustworthy authority has far reaching effects beyond that event. It effects the parents ability to be taken seriously about other issues, too.


Booze taken in moderation (so there's no change in personality or behavior), is Ok. Anything more is often seen as selfish and interferes with the kids ability to trust and feel safe and learn from them.

[ShatteredWings]

If the kid is under 10
NEVER.

Let's think. Do you really want your elementary schooler being around a parent who's so drunk they're becoming violent?
No, i don't think so.
I think that's setting a really bad example, and is scaring to the kid

Or, explaining that it's a "mommy and daddy drink"
Really now. That Excuse Is Bullshit. Every kid who's been around a parent who drinks knows that they change...

If they're older, i don't think it's as "bad".. as long as they're not drunk like in the last example... i mean at least the older kid can get out of the way, or leave.



/this is probably a little biaused

[Dragonite]

my mom dosent drink but my dad dose, not alot though just like once every 2 weeks

[INFERNO]

;468334']If the kid is under 10
NEVER.



I'll ask again: Why 10 years old? Why not 9 or 11 or 8?

[ShatteredWings]

Okay, ten is an aubratary age in a sence.

13 might make more sense to someone else.

I say ten, because at that point most kid have hit a newer matuirty, and can usually understand that what their parents are doing isn't their fault.
and normally an older kid can go to their room and do something if their parents are wasted.


No matter the age though, there is something VERY wrong in seeing one of your parents drunk. It's more scary to see them drinking with a six year old on their lap...

[Sapphire]

;468578']I say ten, because at that point most kid have hit a newer matuirty, and can usually understand that what their parents are doing isn't their fault.
Hmm, I think that is very dependent on the child, the parent and the situation in general.

I see where you are coming from with everything else. I think it depends on how the parent is while drunk. If they are as you have outlined then I agree that it is wrong. However, not all parents are violent or aggressive when they've been drinking.

[ShatteredWings]

True, it does depend on the kid.
But it's hard to tell someone "wait until the kid's ready" because they probably wouldn't know and/or care to find out.
then again, if they're the kind of person who'd do that, they probably don't care about the kids period

[Cloud]

if my dad comes in drunk which is rare i beat him up for fun cos he moves super slow.
if my brother comes in drunk we laugh at him because he always tri[ps over the bush infront of our front door.
and when im around people getting drunk is usually at family parties where everything is crazy even if everyone was sober so it hasnt really affected me. but thats just my family.

but if the child is very impressionable or young it shoudlnt be done

[byee]

It's curious that some give a pass on drunkedness and use some convoluted rationalizations based on age or culture or their own experiences.

Parents have a responsibility to take care fo their kids, I don't think they really get time off from that. When a parent is drunk, they're less available to their kids, regardless of the kids age. There's an impairment that results from being intoxicated that interferes with judgement and responsibility.

There's a distinction btw'n 'Drinking' and 'Drunk'. Having a glass of wine with dinner is a lot different (and gives a much different message) than coming home blasted and worthless. It's too bad that those same toasted parents cannot see that their choice fairly dismisses completely their own credibility as authority figures and 'good' parents. Then it's these same parents who often rail against their kids rebelliousness, oblivious to how they as parents have established that by their own actions.