Need some Advice...

[Bynum17]

Well there's this girl I asked out about a month ago. We went out for like 3 days and then she told me that she wasn't ready for a relationship so she wanted to still kind of be bf-gf but wait till later. She always told me she liked me but I never really thought it. It's because she never showed it in person, was never too intimate and would pick her friends over me when we were in public. So a week ago, I find out she's making out with this other dude. She wasn't technically cheating on me but I told her listen I think it was a mistake to ask you out, I think we should just be friends.

Well of course I'm still having feelings for her when I'm around her. But I'm trying not to because I got screwed over the first time lol. She kind of gave me fals hope I guess. Well, anyway any thoughts on what I should do or if I should feel differently?

I just really want a gf right now to have a good relationship (not in it for sex). I want to move on too if this girl just isn't right for me...

Cheers:cool:

[Skeln]

Well, she obviously tried giving it a shot with going out with you and didn't fiund you to be her type. At least, that's what it soudns like. I say just get over her, you can still be friends, but I doubt she's the right one for you.

[byee]

We can't tell you to feel differently, you're entitled to your feelings, and besides, it wouldn't work anyway. feelings are too complicated and often too irrational for someone to be 'talked out of' them.

That said, your feelings for her are the result of whatever attraction you have towards her. That attraction didn't change when you found her 'cheating' with another guy, it just added another feeling, betrayal (and maybe a bit of jealousy). Love/like/attraction and betrayal/jealousy don't mix well, so you decided to end it. Just b/c you ended it doesn't mean the feelings end. It takes time for them to fade, sometimes they never do. But that doesn't change the soundness of your judgement, your decision on what to do in light of the feelings.

Remember that eventhough you have feelings about someone, you also still think about them, and process the *stuff* you get from them. In your case, the thoughts about what you saw took precedence over your feelings, and you made the choice to end it. And, I might add, not necessarily the wrong choice either. It's not unreasonable for your g/f to be exclusively committed to you.

There'll be others who are more consistent with you and more appreciative, too.