friend of five years...apology letter..advice please

[Halibut]

this is a letter to my penpal of five years. my bestfriend. my brother. we met and he didnt like who i was..what do you think of this. should i send it to him?


Hey, please read this!
At first when you told me you didn’twant to stay in contact, I was hurt. Then I was mad and tried to act like I didn’t care. Then I started crying.I asked several close friends if they thought I was self centered and they said no.; but I guess that’s really not the point. You said you did not like the person I am. Well I guess you have a right to say that. But what your saying I am isn’t really me. I got nervous and when I get nervous I start acting that way.
But in no way am I a whore! Ok, yes I enjoy sex. And no im not happy with the number of guys I have slept with(10). But you know what that’s nothing to the rest of people. But then again were not talking about that so nevermind that. But that is only one part of me. And if you don’t like me for that one part then how are you too see the rest of me. I volunteer now helping brain injured kids! I clean the house, I go to work, and do my school and I am going to start going to the old folks home. Now I barely have enough time for friends! The person you saw in that one week was not me. Im sorry for the way I acted and your right, if I was like that everyday that would be aweful and I would hate myself. But that isn’t me ok. I know im not perfect and I know im sexually active but im working on it! Its just I had no attention before and now its crazy the attention im getting and im not used to it! And once it starts its hard to stop. That’s why im not hanging out with those people anymore. Instead I volunteer my time and made new friends, and I do yoga now which helps how I feel about myself. I have been wanting to write you in the last week. But I felt it wouldn’t matter because you have your mind set on the way I am. But I am not going to sit here and let a friendship of five years be ruined! I promise you that is not the person I am. And im asking for another chance to show you that! Im not going to beg you though. I really am the person you thought I was before you met me. But I got real nervous and that’s how I try to cover up myself. In reality I am a bookworm who would rather spend a night with a good friend or a good book then go out and party. I rarely drink, I don’t do pot anymore. And I don’t hook up like that anymore. Thank you for your friendship , and I hope it can still continure
kellie

[BeautifulSilence]

Moved to Family and Friends.

Good luck Kellie :)

[byee]

Kellie, this is a nice letter, although I'm not exactly sure what the point is. What is he so angry with you for, what have you done to him? The point of the letter should be a clarification of the problem, you haven't idenified what the problem here is btw'n you.


What you've got here is very defensive and overly apologetic, and sometimes when the problem is the result of some major screw up on your part, that's a good way to go. But, the sense I get there is that you've done nothing wrong, and certainly nothing wrong to him. As I see it, you've lived your life, and in the process of doing so have made some decisions and choices, which you've shared with him. Seems to me, he's overreacted to this, and actually betrayed your trust in him as your friend. Afterall, friends share with eachother, and there's this expectation built on the friendship that the other person will handle and accept what you're saying to them. Not abandon you as a result.

Do what you will, but I'd recommend you throw a little light onto his behavior too, that being a friend means accepting your friend, regardless of the choices they make, esp. those that have nothing to do with them. I think there are times to grovel, and then there are time to explain and be more observational, even if it comes out a little confrontational. That way, instead of maing your behavior the issue, you can help him see that his is much more of a problem here.