Why is it "wrong/bad" to self injure?

[cottonkitty]

Hi, I'm sorry if this thread has already been done before or if it's breaking any rules (since it may look like I'm particularly encouraging SI), but I have a simple question: Why do so many people, SI-ers included, think it's wrong to self-injure? I know it sounds really stupid but I honestly don't understand.. I've been wondering for years and had no idea of where else I could post this.

I can see why you'd want to prevent yourself or someone else from self mutilation if the person is in fact putting their life in danger (for example, cutting at the wrist with a great deal of pressure rather than just minor cuts/scratches or if that person isn't familiar with first aid and is at risk of serious infection).

I am not coming here with the intention of criticizing anyone or starting up an argument. Aside from close ones trying to stuff you into a psych ward or calling up counselors that you could see, I'm just a little confused with the whole "omg no don;t do that ::hug::"-thing. I see that a lot and it sort of bothers me, especially when the person isn't even looking to stop.

In my opinion, I really don't think it's of anyone's business. I mean we all have our ways of coping with our problematic emotions, don't we? This isn't like alcoholism or drug abuse, where we actually end up getting in someone's way. I don't see why it's fair to take away someone's from of escape without even giving fair reasoning in return. when he or she is ready to stop, they will and they'll also probably find an alternative way to coping on their own as well.

+[I]'cause scars r bad is pretty duh and we're all long aware of that, so I'd appreciate not having to read that.

I'm sorry if I'm coming off a little strong, and thanks a lot for your time. Hopefully I didn't anger or upset anyone. <.<; If I did, then sorry for that, too. That's totally unintentional.
Thanks again.

[Waste-of-space]

I think I understand where you're coming from. Why should people even care if I'm cutting myself? I'm not hurting anyone else. My cuts aren't that deep and I feel like they allow me to keep acting normal.

On the otherhand, there does seem to be a huge stigma around SI. Because of this, I would definitely hesitate before telling someone that I did it.

[Φρανκομβριτ]

well, where should I start.
It is not healthy to harm yourself. You put yourself at risk of infection, and / or death. Wether you like it or not, people love you, and don't want you to be in harm.

Next, it's extremely frowned upon in todays society. Why does this matter? It hinders you fom getting a job, etc.

Self harm means that there's something severely wrong going on in your head. You ahve a lot of pain/ anger / depression that you need to get out, and there are much more healthy and constructives ways of doing so.

Finally, even if it is not intended, it draws negative attention to yourself. It sucks, but it's the truth. It may be none of societies business, but they don't really give a fuck.

Hope this has helped.

[Rebel]

I understand why you are wondering why it is "bad" to self harm. Most people feel its bad because theres a big danger of you killing yourself if you aren't careful. It's also because it's not exactly socially acceptable. I was kinda mad at my mom when she got so upset over my cutting because she smokes and it's like the same thing! Most people smoke to release stress which is the reason why most people cut and everytime you smoke you are hurting youself even though it doesn't leave scars.

[theOperaGhost]

***I'm going to try to put this as sensitively as I can. If mods think it's over the top, please remove.***

Firstly, I understand that it is a coping mechanism, however there are astronomically more ways to cope than by cutting yourself. Drugs and alcohol are also ways to cope, however they are extremely detrimental to your health. SO IS HARMING YOURSELF. There is absolutely nothing healthy about doing that, as well as the fact that it IS addicting. The cutting itself isn't the addiction, it is the chemicals released in your body when you are in physical pain.

Secondly, self harm just adds to the stress and/or problems. Now instead of the stress that caused you to harm, you've got to worry about covering the cuts, hiding it from people, cleaning up the mess, etc.

Thirdly, what does self harm achieve? It's not going to change anything in your life or make it better (it in fact makes it worse). If you want your life to get better, you need to get up and work on it. This is not saying go to an institution or a counselor (although they CAN help you), this is saying work at making a positive difference in your own life. Change your attitude. Make a change for the better yourself. Cutting is just an easy way to get rid of your problems, but it's only TEMPORARY. You have to work at a permanent change in your life. Get up, get help and change your life yourself instead of sitting in your own self pity slicing your body up; it doesn't help your life in ANY way.

I hope I've given good reasons why self harming is bad.

[Sapphire]

I don't see self harm as a horrendous thing tbh with you. It helped me through years and years of torment and I still see it as the thing that kept me sane for so long.

It is, however, a sign that something is very wrong. Maybe you are unhappy or depressed. Maybe you have lots of pent up anger. Whatever it is that causes you to self harm, it isn't good. This is why self harm is, in my eyes, a bad thing

[ShatteredGlass]

Well why i feel SI is bad because it is in the bible not to: Therefore do not mark or tattoo your body/ temple of God. So that would be why I would not.

[cottonkitty]

Thanks a lot for the input, everyone.
This post is going to look huge but keep in mind that in it are individual replies. ^_^; Don't worry about having to read or reply to it either, even if a section is being addressed to you.
Thanks again!


I think I understand where you're coming from. Why should people even care if I'm cutting myself? I'm not hurting anyone else. My cuts aren't that deep and I feel like they allow me to keep acting normal.

On the otherhand, there does seem to be a huge stigma around SI. Because of this, I would definitely hesitate before telling someone that I did it.
Yeah, that's pretty much what I was going for.
That's another issue that brushes the subject, but yeah, it's definitely not something that I'd ever want to share as well.

well, where should I start.
It is not healthy to harm yourself. You put yourself at risk of infection, and / or death. Wether you like it or not, people love you, and don't want you to be in harm.

Next, it's extremely frowned upon in todays society. Why does this matter? It hinders you fom getting a job, etc.

Self harm means that there's something severely wrong going on in your head. You ahve a lot of pain/ anger / depression that you need to get out, and there are much more healthy and constructives ways of doing so.

Finally, even if it is not intended, it draws negative attention to yourself. It sucks, but it's the truth. It may be none of societies business, but they don't really give a fuck.

Hope this has helped.
As stated before, suppose the person knows the safety precautions that he or she need to take in order to avoid risk of infection or severe blood loss.

The next sort of falls under the "'cause scars are bad" category. There are many different places that aren't exactly exposed to the public's eye. Depending on which you're thinking of: yes, scars in said places might more than none turn the gender in interest off and that does indeed bring up a problem, but if we were just talking about arms/legs, then it should be mentioned that wearing long sleeves, light jackets, or maybe even bracelets, don't necessarily stop you from getting the career that you want. I'm sure there are places that require mildly revealing attire, but those are usually not as important or significant in numbers (meaning potentially permanent work fields such as medical, business, police, law, etc.). I understand that there are some places with exceedingly strict uniform rules but those really are so rare or rewarding that they hardly come off as a threat.

I'm aware of what self harming reveals about your mind and turning to those constructive methods has also already been partially covered--that it takes time for a person to find such ways and eventually they most likely will, without having to be reminded. Going on a short journey of self-discovery to find an alternative doesn't sound so effective during a time of madness or hectic period in your life.
At times, that alternative would crumble and the person is left stripped all over again. I don't see why it would be wrong to briefly go back to the phase that helped you cope for so long and has helped keep your sanity in tact. They already knows the basics, their life is not at risk.

Scars r bad again~ But yeah, that does indeed seem to be a common problem among many, but what's done is done. Another hidden scratch won't make much of a difference once it's aged and displayed near its neighboring marks.

This definitely helped. Yes it may have seemed like I disagreed with most of it, but that's a fault in my character and your post indubitably did lift a lot. It means a lot to me that you bothered to sacrifice your time to respond. :] Thank you.

I understand why you are wondering why it is "bad" to self harm. Most people feel its bad because theres a big danger of you killing yourself if you aren't careful. It's also because it's not exactly socially acceptable. I was kinda mad at my mom when she got so upset over my cutting because she smokes and it's like the same thing! Most people smoke to release stress which is the reason why most people cut and everytime you smoke you are hurting youself even though it doesn't leave scars.
Yes, and most of those people are right. I'm talking about a person that knows that the self harmer absolutely knows what they're doing, though.
Nothing wrong with wanting social acceptance, but I don't see why SI has to be a shared bit of information with anyone in the first place. Many things we do aren't exactly socially acceptable, but we still do them anyway and life goes on. Can't be a perfect human from a 50's TV show, you know?
That's a pretty interesting comparison. Although smoking comes with a whole bundle of more risks and consequentially hurts the people around as well, it does have its similarities. It sounds bizarre, but I guess if lungs were on the outside of our bodies, the differences between SI and smoking cigarettes wouldn't be as far apart.
Moms care though. If you took up smoking, she probably wouldn't have been any more enthusiastic to learn that either. ;p

***I'm going to try to put this as sensitively as I can. If mods think it's over the top, please remove.***

Firstly, I understand that it is a coping mechanism, however there are astronomically more ways to cope than by cutting yourself. Drugs and alcohol are also ways to cope, however they are extremely detrimental to your health. SO IS HARMING YOURSELF. There is absolutely nothing healthy about doing that, as well as the fact that it IS addicting. The cutting itself isn't the addiction, it is the chemicals released in your body when you are in physical pain.

Secondly, self harm just adds to the stress and/or problems. Now instead of the stress that caused you to harm, you've got to worry about covering the cuts, hiding it from people, cleaning up the mess, etc.

Thirdly, what does self harm achieve? It's not going to change anything in your life or make it better (it in fact makes it worse). If you want your life to get better, you need to get up and work on it. This is not saying go to an institution or a counselor (although they CAN help you), this is saying work at making a positive difference in your own life. Change your attitude. Make a change for the better yourself. Cutting is just an easy way to get rid of your problems, but it's only TEMPORARY. You have to work at a permanent change in your life. Get up, get help and change your life yourself instead of sitting in your own self pity slicing your body up; it doesn't help your life in ANY way.

I hope I've given good reasons why self harming is bad.
Thanks for being considerate enough to keep your sensitivity in check.
I'm guilty of wondering though if you just skimmed through my opening post, as I notice you mentioned a few things that I suggested I'd find irrelevant. i.e. drugs and alcohol and seeking better options for coping. Not blaming you though since I didn't exactly highlight those bits.

Self harm might not be healthy but neither is it necessarily unhealthy, in the case that I present, at least.
Yes, there are alternate methods to cope but like I said in my post to ΦρανψοΒριτ, such methods at times might no longer work and might even end up giving you further emotional pain. This slightly strays away from my original topic of concern since it sort of introduces a new scenario, but, if desired, a thorough example of this would be if the former SI-er turned to art as an escape.

After years of devotion to paintings and sketches, they'll begin noticing mistakes that have never shown themselves before. They will learn that an artist's work will never be final and a hobby that they once saw as something relaxing will suddenly gain weight and bring anxiety upon the artist when creating and burden when completed.
Not to say that such a phase lasts for months on end and it may sound over dramatic, but it happens often that heightened artistic awareness will hurt the artist by making them feel that they are losing something important and it would, for the time being, no longer serve as a rewarding remedy. The effect is that he or she is once again at point A.

During a period like that in your life, I don't understand why it would be wrong to trace back your steps and give in to a few slip-ups. Repeating myself, you're being ultimately safe here. The time that you're finally ready to re-approach your love to create, if not seek a different route instead, will naturally reappear as well. The same can be applied to a starting out self harmer (though generally not as favored because you might question just how safe they're being or feel that it's not too late yet [meaning they still have a weak number of markings that are able to be brushed off as something accidental]). Since you already understand how this works as a coping mechanism, I trust you'll be able to see how it may help this sequential SI-er. [do need a better term for that]

About the chemicals that are released, yes, such addictions definitely at times are a problem. I fail to see why though if said person is, forgive me for saying the same thing over and over, being totally careful. When the time is right, they will eventually stop on their own. Nothing we do is ever forever, especially this. Like you said, it's only a temporary sense of relief. Many things are, this is easily one of them.

Everything has its positives and negatives/pros and cons. I don't want to speak for the entire population, but the feeble stress that comes from the need to hide the evidence might be well worth it, just how [although probably not as powerfully] the stress of knowing that your painting might come out looking like crap is also bound to be put up against gratification.

Regarding your thirdly, I thought you said you understood how it works as a coping mechanism. That's exactly what it achieves; containing sanity.
Finally, I do agree with you that it's always best to face life with such an optimistic attitude, but for some, it's a whole lot easier said than done. Figuratively speaking, some problems people face are pretty much just dead ends, and working your way around it might be a mile long. An easy way to rid of such problems surely does sound a whole lot more attractive when you're running short on time. Changing your attitude is often an unspoken promise that is in actuality very gradual, this goes for "getting up," too. Until then, self harm is usually a pretty useful source of fuel for doing just that.
Also, I don't think it’s fair to just generalize everyone as those who "sit in their own self pity and slice their body up." That's a pretty common stereotypical way of thinking and I hope I'm just misunderstanding you when I read that..

You've definitely given reasons to think about. Thank you.

I don't see self harm as a horrendous thing tbh with you. It helped me through years and years of torment and I still see it as the thing that kept me sane for so long.

It is, however, a sign that something is very wrong. Maybe you are unhappy or depressed. Maybe you have lots of pent up anger. Whatever it is that causes you to self harm, it isn't good. This is why self harm is, in my eyes, a bad thing
I'm leveled on a pretty similar footing as you.
I understand what you mean but self harm doesn't exactly change the fact that there is something wrong with you, so I really don't see why SI [I]itself is bad.

Well why i feel SI is bad because it is in the bible not to: Therefore do not mark or tattoo your body/ temple of God. So that would be why I would not.
Makes sense, thanks. Didn't even think about that being a possibility. Nonetheless, I wouldn't use that as a reason to try and get someone to stop since that's a matter of personal belief.




SI being socially unacceptable does seem to be a popular reason, so I guess I got my answer. I was just wondering if that's all that there was to it.
Many thanks for your time and input, everyone! Thanks to those who bothered reading this thread, too. I honestly appreciate it.

[Antares]

It's bad because it gives the harmer a self sense of...peace??/ Someone can help me with that word. Anyways also, it looks bad. It labels the person as someone who can't control their emotions and can't channel their emotions into something constructive.
I refuse! To read the post above mine but lol those are the most prominent ones...I can think of atm

EDIT:
Ill make it easy.
i agree with jared :P

[theOperaGhost]

I'm sorry for the "sitting in your own self pity..." line. That is the one I regretted putting in there and basically the only reason for the warning at the top of my post.

Also, I did read your what you said about drugs and alcohol in the opening post, I just happened to disagree and stated my views in my post. Thank you considering my response. I hope I helped you realize things and if I didn't, at least I tried.

Please take into account that these are ONLY my opinions on self harm, as I don't know how society views it. I have to be honest that I have very little experience with self harm and have only done it a handful of times. I try to look at things from both perspectives as much as possible and I try to understand why someone would think self harm is alright. If you ever want to talk more, feel free to PM me.

[grass]

Ah wow, someone I actually agree with, well said cotton kitty.
I realize that for some people it is a problem and something they need help with
but for me and I assume others I think of it more as a choice.
I could stop but I enjoy it so why should I ?
Although I realise I'm bias, this is ironically due to the overreaction of people when I was discoverd.

[Mzor203]

Ok, I used to think like this myself. I used to think that everyone should just get off self-harmers' backs, because it wasn't hurting anybody. But I've realized just from cutting a few small times, that there is a problem with it.

Self harming can almost be compared to marijuana. Actually, forget the almost part. It can be very directly compared to marijuana. Pot doesn't really do anything to your body, but it's mentally addicting, and it can be incredibly hard to pull yourself out of it. The same with self-harming. You can very easily get addicted to it, and while it may not hurt your body, exactly, it can be extremely hard to pull yourself out of that addiction.

With both of these things, you can end up being completely reliant on them, and that isn't good. When you're at the point where you absolutely need to cut to let go of your feelings, then you have a problem. You're going to get to the point where you're isolating yourself from the world, where you can't go on without cutting, and you're eventually going to crash, hard. When you're in that state, sometimes you'll just keep cutting deeper and deeper, not realizing what you're doing, and eventually you'll cut so deep in hard that you damage your body very, very badly. Self harming is just one big spiral down into a bottomless pit where you may never be able to pull yourself out of.

When you start it, it may not seem like a bad thing But it'll get worse. It's addicting, and eventually it will suck you in.

[Noodle]

i agree with mzor SI-ing it can be conpared to any drug b/c the felling of "high" it can give you even though it may not seem like so it gives a high just like any other drug and can become reliant upon >.<

scince this is here....

what about the people that do it just for the feeling of it (i.e. people that like pain aka masochist) they feel like >.<(i cannot descride it) but SI-ing isn't good for your phiscal state as well as the mental state it can make you be isolated (not all of the time b/c some people are acticve and Si them self) >.< well if this doesn't help i am sorry i am not good at helping poeple

[cottonkitty]

*Don't worry about having to reply and all that stuff*


It's bad because it gives the harmer a self sense of...peace??/ Someone can help me with that word. Anyways also, it looks bad. It labels the person as someone who can't control their emotions and can't channel their emotions into something constructive.
I refuse! To read the post above mine but lol those are the most prominent ones...I can think of atm

EDIT:
Ill make it easy.
i agree with jared :P
Thank you for sharing your aspect on the matter. It helps.
I did mention to a similar response though that a person can avoid said labels, if not already too late for that anyway.

I'm sorry for the "sitting in your own self pity..." line. That is the one I regretted putting in there and basically the only reason for the warning at the top of my post.

Also, I did read your what you said about drugs and alcohol in the opening post, I just happened to disagree and stated my views in my post. Thank you considering my response. I hope I helped you realize things and if I didn't, at least I tried.

Please take into account that these are ONLY my opinions on self harm, as I don't know how society views it. I have to be honest that I have very little experience with self harm and have only done it a handful of times. I try to look at things from both perspectives as much as possible and I try to understand why someone would think self harm is alright. If you ever want to talk more, feel free to PM me.
Ah, I see. Sorry, that confused me for a second because the particular view you shared isn't one that I disagreed with. I didn't dwell on it, but yeah, alcohol and drugs tend to hurt the user just the same.

Truth be told, any response would have been efficient for me at the moment since this is the first time I'm getting any sort of feedback towards the subject, but your reply without a doubt did give me something to think about. Thank you for that, and I appreciate the time you had to give up in order to answer.

Of course~ I did come in here with the intention of gathering your opinions, after all. I'll be sure to keep them, with their roots, in mind.
Thank you for being so welcoming.

Ah wow, someone I actually agree with, well said cotton kitty.
I realize that for some people it is a problem and something they need help with
but for me and I assume others I think of it more as a choice.
I could stop but I enjoy it so why should I ?
Although I realise I'm bias, this is ironically due to the overreaction of people when I was discoverd.
It's always nice to see eye to eye with someone.
I feel that this is a subject of choice as well.

Ok, I used to think like this myself. I used to think that everyone should just get off self-harmers' backs, because it wasn't hurting anybody. But I've realized just from cutting a few small times, that there is a problem with it.

Self harming can almost be compared to marijuana. Actually, forget the almost part. It can be very directly compared to marijuana. Pot doesn't really do anything to your body, but it's mentally addicting, and it can be incredibly hard to pull yourself out of it. The same with self-harming. You can very easily get addicted to it, and while it may not hurt your body, exactly, it can be extremely hard to pull yourself out of that addiction.

With both of these things, you can end up being completely reliant on them, and that isn't good. When you're at the point where you absolutely need to cut to let go of your feelings, then you have a problem. You're going to get to the point where you're isolating yourself from the world, where you can't go on without cutting, and you're eventually going to crash, hard. When you're in that state, sometimes you'll just keep cutting deeper and deeper, not realizing what you're doing, and eventually you'll cut so deep in hard that you damage your body very, very badly. Self harming is just one big spiral down into a bottomless pit where you may never be able to pull yourself out of.

When you start it, it may not seem like a bad thing But it'll get worse. It's addicting, and eventually it will suck you in.
Fair comparison, but "pot doesn't really do anything to your body" is a pretty silly statement. Use of marijuana does a lot worse to your body than a cautious self harmer could ever do. I'm getting a bit tired of having to constantly repeat myself so forgive me for using copy/paste.
Regarding addiction: About the chemicals that are released, yes, such addictions definitely at times are a problem. I fail to see why though if said person is, forgive me for saying the same thing over and over, being totally careful. When the time is right, they will eventually stop on their own.

I can see how addiction can be a problem, as discussed with thePianoMan, but such a downfall doesn't happen to everyone. In cases that I'm familiar with, it seems to help more than it does harm. But yes, the verity of that result does indeed stand. It really all depends on the mentality of the person and I can see why you'd want to convince someone otherwise (if you fear that their condition will worsen although their cuts are still shallow for the time being). This definitely qualifies as one of those reasons that I asked for, but personally, I find it a tad unfair to underestimate someone's sense of control (especially if said person has already stopped on their own before) based on a couple of outcomes performed by others.

(..It is unfortunately true that I am too lenient and trusting in people's own restraint.)

Thank you for your comment.

i agree with mzor SI-ing it can be conpared to any drug b/c the felling of "high" it can give you even though it may not seem like so it gives a high just like any other drug and can become reliant upon >.<

scince this is here....

what about the people that do it just for the feeling of it (i.e. people that like pain aka masochist) they feel like >.<(i cannot descride it) but SI-ing isn't good for your phiscal state as well as the mental state it can make you be isolated (not all of the time b/c some people are acticve and Si them self) >.< well if this doesn't help i am sorry i am not good at helping poeple
Yes, the sense that SI and certain drugs achieve can cause these two to be compared, but again, such a comparison isn't exactly fair as drugs bring on more harm to the user's body as well as [the severity of this depends on the drug] harm to the people around them. I've mentioned this in my opening post. SI is something rather more private.

I don't see how it's so bad for your mental state if SI is what, for the most part, helps keep your sanity in tact in the first place.
For the physical state, it isn't good but neither is it particularly bad. Again, we're talking about a person who knows what their doing.

Whether isolation is something that should be avoided is a topic full of conflicting opinions. If you're just restating what Mzor said about it (that eventually you'll be so isolated to the point of undeniable excessive harm) then my response to that is just above your part of this post. It does seem like something you'd want to approach with caution, that's for sure.

Thank you for your input. :)

[Mzor203]

Fair comparison, but "pot doesn't really do anything to your body" is a pretty silly statement. Use of marijuana does a lot worse to your body than a cautious self harmer could ever do. I'm getting a bit tired of having to constantly repeat myself so forgive me for using copy/paste.
Regarding addiction: About the chemicals that are released, yes, such addictions definitely at times are a problem. I fail to see why though if said person is, forgive me for saying the same thing over and over, being totally careful. When the time is right, they will eventually stop on their own.

I can see how addiction can be a problem, as discussed with thePianoMan, but such a downfall doesn't happen to everyone. In cases that I'm familiar with, it seems to help more than it does harm. But yes, the verity of that result does indeed stand. It really all depends on the mentality of the person and I can see why you'd want to convince someone otherwise (if you fear that their condition will worsen although their cuts are still shallow for the time being). This definitely qualifies as one of those reasons that I asked for, but personally, I find it a tad unfair to underestimate someone's sense of control (especially if said person has already stopped on their own before) based on a couple of outcomes performed by others.

(..It is unfortunately true that I am too lenient and trusting in people's own restraint.)

Thank you for your comment.


The problem is, you can always say to yourself that you won't go further than a shallow cut. But what happens when you're going through a bad mental crisis and you can't think straight? There are so many times when one acts before really thinking and analyzing their situation.

Now, if a person has stopped cutting before, but has come back to it, that in itself shows an instability in the way that they need to rely on cutting to keep them going. That reliance shows that, this is something that is eventually going to get worse because they're going to become more and more comfortable with it, and as they get more comfortable, the sense of danger associated with cutting too deeply is drastically minimized. Once you fall into a false sense of security, then there are so many times and situations that you might find yourself going too deep in.

Sometimes things are just out of your control. Repeated self harm is an obvious indication of a need to do it, and an addiction, and as with something like an alcohol or drug addiction, when you tell yourself, "I will only have a certain amount of this", how often do they stick to only having "just one glass"?

It's not going to lead anywhere good, that's for certain. And as you become used to the self harming over long periods of time, you're going to start needing more and more to get that satisfaction that comes with it. In this way, yes, a self harm addiction is just as bad as a marijuana addiction. It will end up damaging your body much more than you think it will.

So, my conclusion is, with something as otentially dangerous as this, taking that risk really isn't worth it. It just isn't going to end well the majority of time, and why put yourself in that situation? When actually stop and analyze it like this, it doesn't make sense to put yourself in such danger.

[Hyper]

There is no such thing as ''controlling'' addictive behaivours. You may be able to control how much you push the blade, when your life is mildly stressful

But what you can never control is bad events happening.. And if someone like you who thinks its completly ok, one day finds themselves in a pool of shit, they'll most likely end up slicing their wrists.

And even if someone who can maintain control, saying that its non harmful to your body is complete horseshit

You are taking a sharp instrument and cutting through your layers of skin. Now lets imagine that you use a sterile instrument and lets imagine you tend to the cut.. The fact still remains that your damaging your skin, the largest protective organ of your body.

Mentally you are also damaging yourself, your creating a false sense of security and strength, your using borrowed mental strength that really stems from a illogical behaivour.

Illogical? Yes very illogical as you are damaging your own body.

Illogical from a human point of view.. Your automatically setting yourself up for harassment and social torture, which by itself causes more stress and will push you to use more of your ''method of keeping sanity''

Quite frankly Fair Lady! I do not have the patience to dream up a truly fancy writing here with sparkling grammar and many many extraordinary words.. SO I*m going to put it this way

Saying that SH is just like any other method of coping is absolute bull shit. Furthermore I'd like to state that claiming SH to be a exploration of coping methods is even smellier bull shit.

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

Before I say anything I would like address this comment (and I will make it small so it doesn't take up too much space, I know this post is epic as it is):
what about the people that do it just for the feeling of it (i.e. people that like pain aka masochist) they feel like >.<(i cannot descride it

Self-harm and masochism are NOT the same thing. Self-harm is not deriving pleasure from pain, rather using the injury as a means of coping with life. Some self-harmers actually report not feeling the pain, just the endorphin rush associated with it. It's not about pain, it's about the illusion that it makes things better. In addition, masochism is most often used in a sexual manner (i.e. the pain gets them off, it doesn't just make them happy the same way that a bubble bath would for you or me). I know this isn't the point of this thread, but it really bugs me when people use the word "masochism" in this context.

~~~

Now, on to the real deal here.

Cottonkitty, you really confuse me. As a former cutter, I can understand the confusion about why it's really so bad to hurt yourself. However, from your responses, it seems as though you're trying to remove the psychological aspect from it.
I understand what you mean but self harm doesn't exactly change the fact that there is something wrong with you, so I really don't see why SI itself is bad.
Are we talking about self-harm or scarification? Self-harm cannot be separated into the harm and the mental state and then viewed as two unrelated conditions, or it loses all context. The self-harm stems from the mental state, and the mental state is then affected by the act of harming oneself. Simply cutting/branding/otherwise creating superficial damage to yourself isn't quite the same as hurting yourself to cope, or to "punish" yourself to ease guilty feelings. Self-harm is as destructive as alcohol or drug abuse, even if the physical effects may not be as permanent. Just because infection can be avoided and scars minimized, does NOT mean that it is ok.

It's bad because it doesn't solve the problem. Just like alcohol can make you forget your troubles for a while, or drugs can get you to a place where reality doesn't matter so much, cutting can distract you from emotional/psychological pain. Also, like drugs and alcohol, it doesn't stay that way. The feelings come back, and you're at square one all over again. This is not the same as your painting analogy:
Yes, there are alternate methods to cope but like I said in my post to ΦρανψοΒριτ, such methods at times might no longer work and might even end up giving you further emotional pain. (...) They will learn that an artist's work will never be final and a hobby that they once saw as something relaxing will suddenly gain weight and bring anxiety upon the artist when creating and burden when completed.
Not to say that such a phase lasts for months on end and it may sound over dramatic, but it happens often that heightened artistic awareness will hurt the artist by making them feel that they are losing something important and it would, for the time being, no longer serve as a rewarding remedy. The effect is that he or she is once again at point A.
Yes, that does sound melodramatic. Personally, writing is something I enjoy and use to cope with my life. I also understand that nothing I make/write will ever be truly "perfect". I often go back to old works and end up revising them to create a better flow, or to use a word that I feel is more appropriate/to the point. Something like writer's block or feeling like I can't find the right word to convey my ideas can definitely be frustrating. However, I have had mental breaks before, panic attacks, long periods of depression. In no way does frustration over art really compare. I think you're missing the point.

Art isn't mean to cure anything. It is not a replacement for actual work, an actual attempt to fix the root of the problem. If you have stress in your life, a hobby can help give you something to focus on when it all seems too much. The best solution, though, is to take some time to think up possible ways to alleviate or lessen that stress. You work to fix what you can, and work to cope with what's left. Painting, for example, is not a solution for depression, stress, and/or anxiety, but a way to channel that energy into something you can feel good about.

Even though no coping mechanism will work perfectly 100% of the time, there are still healthy ways to cope. By "healthy", I don't mean that they don't cause physical damage. "Healthy", in this case, means they work to get rid of the pain and stress, not merely cover it up. According to Merriam-Webster, to cope is "to deal with and attempt to overcome problems and difficulties." That means to "fix" it, so it doesn't become such a problem in the future. Self-harm cannot do this, it merely puts it off to be dealt with later, often in the same fashion. Again, I speak from experience.

This is in no way a pity party but let me explain my situation: I'm bipolar, and have been developing symptoms since childhood. My depression and anxiety began as early as four or five years old, and around the time I hit puberty it got worse. I constantly felt like I had to hide from everyone, like my mood was a defect that I had to cover up, and I turned to cutting. When I was 13, my sister suddenly died of heart failure, and the resulting trauma sent me into the more classic cycling between mania and depression. When it became clear that my problems couldn't be attributed to either post-traumatic stress disorder or chronic depression, I was diagnosed bipolar. I have spent the better part of the last four years working to get better. I now feel happier and more "normal" than I have felt for almost as long as I can remember.

How did I accomplish this? It wasn't through self-harm. Quitting SI was one of the first steps I took after finding a therapist I felt I could work with. At the same time, I learned about other ways to manage my feelings. To understand why I felt the way I did, and how to prevent them from coming up so frequently. I could not have made such a recovery without that help. Self-harm worked in the moment, but dragged me back down in the end. Even now, I feel guilt every time I see my scars. I can't help but remember the look on my mother's face when she confronted me about it, the way she cried when my therapist brought both of us in to discuss the problem and what could be done to help me. SI not only is useless for coping long-term, but it hurts more than just you. It's selfish to thing otherwise for even a moment.

To sum this all up: Why is self-harm bad?

It has no long-term benefits, and creates its own problems
It's an addiction, which covers up the REAL problem
It hurts the people around you
Other coping methods are actually productive
And, to re-iterate for the thousandsth time: It will NEVER make the hurt go away, no matter how long you keep at it. Never.