My best friend...

[Cindex]

After writing this, I realize I have no reason to write it. I just felt like writing it. It's not really necessary to read....

I know some people will say when you're this young you don't know love, but I love her.

Two days ago she was put in a mental clinic. Everything got to her and she broke down. She was texting me and her mother, the two closest people to her. Just to make it all worse, both of us were sleeping. If either of us would've been awake this might not have happened.

As soon as it happened I was insanely worried... I've never been worried about anything so much in my life. It's one of the few times I've actually lost sleep because I was worrying about something.

She's not the sort of person that likes to be told what to do. Her mother visited her yesterday, and amazingly she's actually doing better! I don't know if they put her on something, but I'm so glad she's happy!! When I heard her mother say that I just felt pressure come off of my chest. If she wasn't okay I don't know what I would do.

Everything would be okay, but I feel like too much of it is my fault. I saw her slowly falling to pieces and all I ever did was talk. If I really wanted to help I could've caught her up with her homework and kept her ex out of her way. She was out of school sick (which I now remember, I gave to her...) for four days, and her homework piled up. She already has tons of stress, and it just broke her.

I know I could've done more. She's happy now, but she shouldn't have had to go to that place. Her mother said she's hoping to get her out by Tuesday. Five days.... :( That's also three more days out of school. Not good for homework.

I miss her.....

[byee]

You're a good friend.

It's always a bit grandiose to think that you (or any mere mortal) can actually prevent someone from doing/thinking/feeling something. Sure, you can love them and care about them and want to help, want to 'be there', but in the end, everyone is responsible for themselves, and they have to make decisions their own way, regardless of how ill advised they might be.

When she gets out, you can by all means tell her how her actions affected you and what you'd like her to do next time, sometimes people get so self absorbed by their own unhappiness that they forget their actions harm not just themsleves, but loved ones, too. And sometimes, that recognition that actions have consequences for others prevents bad judgement. But, you cannot actually 'stop' someone from doing something they want to, all you can do is be the reminder that whatever they do affects you, too. And hope they remember that.

[Cindex]

I didn't really expect any help to come of this thread. But I thank you, Sam, because of all people someone I've never met gave me hope like no one else has.

While I do thank you, I keep remembering that I really could've helped. She will not be told what to do, but when I suggest things they stick. She takes what I say in all seriousness. If I would've merely been awake she would've had someone to talk to and maybe she wouldn't be in the nut house. I miss her more every second passing.....

Thanks again.... You stopped me from drinking the rest of the Rum bottle.