Argh!

[Midsummer Nights]

My family has been through a lot lately. 3 of my grandparents died in 3 consecutive years. I sometimes think about them and I get really sad and I feel like I'll never be happy again. It does eventually go away, but it takes a while.

I hate it when this happens, because I have to hold my feelings in all day and I really feel horrible at night. I stay up really late crying, or just generally feeling lousy.

Does this happen to anyone else? I mean when you just feel so depressed that you don't know what the point of getting out of bed in the morning is? Can anyone help me?

-- A very sad and depressed flobblewobble:(

[byee]

I'm really sorry for your losses, I know that can be tough. Most people have difficulty with it, so what you're experiencing, however intensely painful, is normal.

Everyone survives loss, it takes time and TLC. The time you don't have much control over, but the TLC part, you do. Make sure you're taking extra special good care of yourself, pamper yourself and be nice to yourself, do the things that typically make you feel good. Like a physical injury, there's something there with emotional wounds, too, even if you cannot see it.

The other way you can take extra good care of yourself is to talk with some people about your feelings, maybe some other family members. Letting it out might be painful as you're doing it, but afterwards it's usually much better. Especially if you're doing it with people who will respond with tenderness and compassion. Often, just being around others who care is good, too, even if you're not talking about your feelings.

It takes time to get over loss, esp. multiple losses, you'll have good days (moments?) and bad ones. But, over time, the pain fades and you're left with all the good memories. And, as the good memories and feelings replace the awful sense of loss, there's often a sense of those relatives continuing presence in your life.

[Requin]

I'm sorry for the loss of your grandparents. And this is a very natural thing really. Any loss of a family member..especially in consecutive years is hard to take.
You are particulary unlucky, I'm sorry dude.

But, the only way I can think of to help is to just say 'chin up' and get on with things. You probably think I'm a heartless evil Brit...but honestly, I can't see how else you can get over it. Remember them, yes...but try and get on with your own life. If you struggle with holding your feelings in all day, then you might need to try and forget about them. Remember the happy times with them, remember what things used to be like.
Try and do the things that you like doing. Doing things that will cheer you up etc. That should make you feel a lot better. It won't make the thoughts go away, but at least you'll be feeling happier. :D

This probably hasn't helped you, but I hope it has. :-)

[Midsummer Nights]

Thank you to both of you. I already feel a little better.