Bad Dream... ugh

[jjmcray]

So I just woke up from a really bad dream. It may not sound like a nightmare to all of you, but to me it is.

I'm real big on abstinence before marriage. No, I'm not straight edge or anything... But that's just how I was raised. When I started going out with my girlfriend, she had assured me she was a virgin and had never engaged in any type of sexual intercourse, and assured me that she was not that kind of person (to go out and have sex before getting married). I trusted her and still do.

But I had a dream, and in that dream I found out she had been pregnant before we started going out, (with someone else, of course) and she wasn't even talking to me. She had been talking to one of her friends and I happened to hear the conversation.

But the problem is that it felt so damn real, and even right now, I feel like punching a wall. I feel like I have been spit at in the face. I feel like she really has been pregnant before and I'm angry that she lied to me about it. But I'm almost positive she is a virgin. But you never know, she has had several boyfriends before. Something could have happened. And I guess it's not my business to ask about it.

What does this mean? As most of you know I am currently having some issues with her right now. Do you think this dream means I don't trust her anymore? That I think she's been lying to me about things, deep down on the inside?

Perhaps it means I know that she is lying to me about some things, but I just don't want to believe it?

[byee]

Yes, I think you might have figured this dream out: You don't trust her. probably the worst thing someone can do to someone else who believes in abstinence is to go out and get pregnant.

I've responded to most of your other concerns about this girl, I'm not sure what your thoughts are about what I've said, but maybe it'll be easier for you to listen to what you're telling yourself. Maybe this isn't the time to be in a relationship? And maybe this isn't he right person for you? Ask yourself why you're holding on here.

[jjmcray]

probably the worst thing someone can do to someone else who believes in abstinence is to go out and get pregnant.


Well in my dream, she didn't get pregnant with someone else while we were going out, it was long before we started dating. Not that it really matters, but anyway...

I honestly have to say the only reason I'm still holding on is probably because she is my first girlfriend, and I just want to make it last as long as possible, and be able to tell everyone else I can last that long in a relationship. I know it's bad to go out with someone for solely that reason, but I'm pretty sure I do love her too. Yes, that's right, I said pretty sure, meaning not 100%.

However I finally managed to ask her out on a date tonight, so perhaps we can straighten things out.

Do you think I should tell her about the dream? Or would it come off as kind of creepy?

[jjmcray]

Alright, fuck it, never mind. She canceled. Screw this. I'm going out with my other friends tonight and I don't give a shit if she knows or not.

Grrrr.... sorry for the double post and the bad language, this is just making me angry.

[byee]

it might be time to let go, even if you don't really want to, and even if you 'kinda' love her. She's just not consistent enough for you, and it doesnlt sound as if that will change anytime soon. Her loss.

Her getting pregnant before she met you still might mean the same thing, it's a betrayal issue. And certaily, there's reason to feel this, she's not very considerate of your feelings, and she is sharing herself with others, even if it's not sexually.

With regard to sharing the dream with her, I would advise against it in this case, b/c it's doubtful she'd understand or be supportive of you. People who aren't supportive of someone's conscious needs (like calling them and talking with them and hanging out with them) are usually not good with their unconscious (dream) issues.

Sometimes it's better to be alone for a while than be in a bad or unsatisfying relationship. The lonliness is temporary, and better tolerated than the neglect you seem to be experiencing now.

[Cindex]

It's just a dream. They don't all need to be interpretated. I had a dream that I was sitting at the computer for the whole weekend on end. Then I went to bed, woke up, and went to school. It means nothing significant.

It was a nightmare. Having a nightmare where you fall off your roof doesn't mean your house hates you. It just means you had a nightmare.

At least she didn't stand you up right? She doesn't know you're mad, agitated about your dream, or worried about you and her. Try to be rash now.

[jjmcray]

Ok, just wanted to make a quick update about me and my girlfriend. We had a really long, deep, heart-felt talk. We are both on the same level now. She didn't realize what she was doing and apologized for making it seem the way it did. Hopefully something like this won't happen again...