Puberty, Pills or just depression?

[wavey]

Hey, i'm on pills for behaviour since i am on the autistic spectrum, i've been in a few schools and now in a one for the problem i have, its got about 80 kids in it and its a "bad lads schooL" which pisses me off when ppl say it because its not, we're just misunderstood kids, anyhow.

the last few months, i've been feeling down, i'm 15 and over the summer i went to cornwall with a friend and had to come home early because i was home sick. i lasted like 6/14 days. if that.

i'd always been home sick, missing mom, worrying about home and contents, so anyhow i thought nothing of it and went back to school where it started to get worse. i was on the dormetry at the times see, so i was away from home after 6 weeks, on a wednesday / thursday which i have changed to a monday thursday in hope that the 2 nights wouldnt cause me home sickness, although i am at school just 10 mins drive away .

so anyway, i had a really bad night and was signed up for CBT - Cogrative behaviour therapy which is like for anxiety, although they're not sure if its depression or anxiety, i am sure its depression, i feel this tingle in my throught as if i'm about the cry most of the days.

I need help, i dont talk face to face because i'm very self concois about what ppl think about me and i dont want people knowing about this at school but if it continues they'll soon know. i am 15 fgs, i have GCSE's in like a year a few months, i need to study, how am i supposed to do that with this awful problem hanging over me.

some days i feel good and the other i feel like shit.

before the holidays i had a bad time on the dorm aswell, and the dorm staff claimed it was probebly just a phase of puberty so i beleived them.

I am obsessed with my mom as i seems, i always wana know, what shes doing, wheres shes at, who shes with, when she'll be back and so on. the first question i ask when i phone her on a night over the dorm is, "are you in the house" people have started to notice and with me getting worse at it its not good.

also, i've been ill for a week so the first week back was really bad for the dorm after 3 weeks with mom an i decided to taket he thursday off, then i fell ill for a week and now i'm going back tomorrow after a week being in the house wiht my mom being ill.

people have asked me why i feel thi way, i think its becuase, i have stuff that MY MOM. bought me, and i am scared to lose it or if it breaks. just like at home, if i cant find sumit i'll start to cry until i find it.

Anyhow, thats just a brief bit of my issues, can somebody please explain why i'm feeling this way and what i can do to prevent it or make it milder. it feels realyl extreme atm and i feel i might get thoughts of suicide.

something i've thought mildly before but never actually said it or thought of it much.

I need to sort my lif eout, come on guys / gals, help me.

please, some1 ........

[Oblivion]

You need to consult a professiona!
They are trained for years to help people through crisis's like this!
They can assess whats going on, and help you through it.
There are medications that can help with anxiety, and depression, etc.
They can help. You should ask your mom, or teachers about it next time you get the chance.

'Pills for behavior' won't fix things.

[Atonement]

Its rough bud.. Its a bit of everything which can be hard to treat for doctors.

Depression and anxiety usually go hand in hand. But since you're on the "autistic spectrum" it can complicate.

No matter what it is. Yes, puberty has a big part in your mood, depression, and anxiety because our minds are growing, hormones are crazy, whatever, it messed with our heads. But no matter whats causing it, it doesn't make it normal. You need consult with your doctors about it. It will really help if you just lay it out on the table to your psychiatrist, and if you have a therapist, them too, your parents, and who ever else you have to help you.

Hope all goes well :daisy:

[Hyper]

You are a definite anxiety case. Usually you get the depression with anything that sucks so you most likely have both.

But your already going to CBT which is good. CBT is basically the best thing for someone who has the problems your having.. It might suck at first but I suggest you just try to go with it, it WILL help with good work from you and the theraphist...

You should focus on getting better. Otherwise you can't study so put your mental health first