mixed emotions

[Gumleaf]

i've been having mixed emotions lately. up until now i haven't really wanted to talk about it, but its eating me up so much i think i need to. those of you who know me would know that i have a gf, joanne, who i love very very much. it would be hard not to know that with the amount of times i talk about her and stuff. so then, why would i now have a crush on another girl? for the last little while i've been having feelings for another girl friend of mine. i don't want these feelings, but they are there and they won't go away. i've tried dealing with it, but it doesn't help and its only eating me up more and more. the whole thing kept me awake last night just thinking about it. i just couldn't get her out of my mind and now it makes me feel like i'm kinda cheating on joanne when i'm not. the thing is though, when i'm with joanne, everything is normal, but when we aren't together, these feelings keep coming back. i don't know what to do and i don't know how to deal with it. i wish there was something i could do to make these feelings go away because i don't want them? :(

[Requin]

I'm sorry to hear about that stephen. That's a sticky situation. Really, I have no 100% idea that would work how to stop thinking about this other girl.

Maybe you need to clear things in your head first?? Try and tell yourself that you are not cheating on her etc...this would at least make you feel better won't it??
It's interesting that you only feel like this when your not with joanne, maybe you crave for her more??

I have had no relationships at all...so I'm not the one to give ideas or tips.
But I'm just trying to make you feel better I guess.
You know that you love joanne, what's missing from your relationship then? Something must be happening (or not happening) to make you feel like you want another girlfriend?

I guess you need to wander if you maybe want to take things a little furthur with joanne. Go out more??? I don't know...I guess you need to find out what you want to do with joanne?

[Θάνατος]

Stephen that really sucks for you. One thing I would ask if you don't want these feelings then maybe stop talking to the other girl. If you want to only be with Jo then you need to stop talking to the other girl.

It is nice that your helped her out but the time has come for you to stop talking to her for a while until you quit having these feelings, I wish you luck mate.

[Gumleaf]

i don't know if i could stop talking to this friend. that would make things suspicious to everyone else if i suddenly cut contact with her like that. idk, i guess i will just have to learn to deal with it i suppose. idk, its so mixed up. i don't want to like her that way, i want her to be my friend and thats it. but, these feelings just don't go away, they just don't. :(

[AllThatIsLeft]

ugh, that is a horrible situation. the same happened to me and i couldn't deal, everytime i saw my boyfriend i would feel so guilty.

my advise would be to convince yourself that you dont. Because you do love your girlfriend, and no matter how she makes you feel, your girlfriend is more important.

Try to distance yourself from that friend as much as you can, without being suspicious.
it will help, and everytime you think of her, try thinking of your girlfriend instead. Tell yourself why you love her, and why you would never do anything to hurt her.

hope i helped!

[Gumleaf]

yeah, that does help. i've been trying those methods already. i just hope it passes and soon you know. its been especially hard too, because joanne has been so great to me in the last few days, it makes me feel dirty having these unwanted feelings.

[AllThatIsLeft]

i get yah, ... you could also try to see the negatives of your friend.... and why you shouldn't like her (besides the fact that you have a girlfriend)

[Cindex]

Sometimes crushes just develop I guess. It happens to the best.

There's not going to be an easy way over it, but love conquers all. I think...

I haven't been here long enough to know your relationship with Joanne, so I can't help as much as others could. The only piece of advice I have is don't touch her. Try to avoid getting closer than you would with a guy friend. The closer you get, the more those unwanted feelings are going to take over.

[Gumleaf]

i don't have that sort of friendship with her where we touch eachother or anything whether it be with hugs or anything, so no worries there. but yeah, i will try all these ideas. this is seriously bringing me down and isn't good.