Is it wrong?

[Smoph]

Is it wrong that i resent my boyfriend for being the reason i can't cut? When i really want to do it i actually consider breaking up with him so i can spend all day doing it. How wrong is that? I feel so evil, how can i think like that. I want to break up with my bf so i can cut. Does anyone else think like this sometimes. That they want to push away people that they love just so you can sh?

[treeman666]

i have i losted that person ever

[Atonement]

Personally, I do not have a significant other. But, if they are the one thing keeping you from cutting, does that not mean its good? I mean, yes you want to cut, but you know its not GOOD for you. If I were you, I would take advantage of the fact that you have support and a person to be there for you and keep you from cutting.

Be safe and take care. :daisy:

[ShatteredGlass]

I push away ppl all the time. I want ppl 2 stop loving me so I can go, i dont want ppl 2 care. I know the feeling.

[ShatteredWings]

Well...

See there isn't really anything to say it's wrong or right. It's not a good thing to be sure. Cutting can seroiusly harm you (no duh...), and could kill you if it's too bad.
But, self ham can feel *right*. Not that it is, but bad things can seem good.

I do push people away. Unintentonally, I keep people from loving me. I've kinda made myself 'unloveable'. It's all a lie though
Everyone can be loved -- barring serial killers and evil people, but you're probably not evil.

[Triceratops]

It isn't wrong, but it isn't right. I do push people away too, but not on purpose. I think I'm just too afraid of hurting them. Same for you mybe, the reason why you feel like you want to break up with him to cut yourself is because you really care about him and you don't want to hurt him? Well, don't break up with him. Keep staying strong. My advice is if you haven't already told your boyfriend about your self-harming, tell him. Talk to him and tell him how much it's hurting you and he will understand.
If you really want help go and see a counsillor.

Good luck with everything :)

[byee]

Oh, c'mon, guys! It IS wrong to feel resentful towards someone who loves you and wants to protect you from yourself! We're supposed to feel appreciative, and thankful, and gratified, and all warm and fuzzy when the presence of someone else in our lives gives us that safe and secure feeling! We should choose the warmth and safety and love of a good relationship to self harm all the time!

I think you're noticing that self harm affects your judgement, it distorts so much, that you can actually resent a warm, loving boyfirend! That's the problem with self harm, it distorts reality, it prevents you from seeing and experiencing things accurately, so the painful actually morphs into the desirable! It also indicates the necessity of treatment to realign your feelings and actions with actual life, to experience pain as something to avoid, not embrace.

Fortunately, these things respond well to therapy, the goal should always be to find a caring, experienced therapist who can help realign your senses here and figure out what happened to you, and give you alternate ways of experiencing yourself, and to cope with the things that upset you.

[ShatteredWings]

Sam, no one can deny feeling something. If you're feeling some way, you are.
Is it wrong to be happy? no
Is it wrong to be sad? no
Is it wrong to be angry? no

Just because you can't understand why someone might think or feel a certain way doesn't make it wrong. It's not something you can judge in black-and-white terms

[byee]

girl;425525']Sam, no one can deny feeling something. If you're feeling some way, you are.
Is it wrong to be happy? no
Is it wrong to be sad? no
Is it wrong to be angry? no

Just because you can't understand why someone might think or feel a certain way doesn't make it wrong. It's not something you can judge in black-and-white terms


Of course you can judge certain things in black and white terms! That's not the same as dismissing someone's experience or 'judging' them, or 'passing judgement' on them. It's about the process that goes on in the mind of cutters I'm commenting on, not the cutter themself (you know that!).

Resenting someone you love for protecting you, even if it's just their presence there in your life that changes your perspective on SH, is 'wrong'. It shows bad judgement and faulty reality testing, which is at least part of the reason why people cut in the first place.

[Smoph]

Resenting someone you love for protecting you, even if it's just their presence there in your life that changes your perspective on SH, is 'wrong'. It shows bad judgement and faulty reality testing, which is at least part of the reason why people cut in the first place.

I think that I agree with you Sam. I know what everyone else is saying, that for a cutter to think this is not wrong or abnormal, but what your saying is that it is wrong for a person to think like that and that it needs resolving. At least that is how I interrupted it.lol. I do know that I shouldn't think what I do but its like its not me, well it is, just its the side of me that I don't like.:P

[byee]

Listen, whatever you call it, whatever it is that prevents you from cutting is a good thing!

[Sapphire]

Is it wrong that i resent my boyfriend for being the reason i can't cut? When i really want to do it i actually consider breaking up with him so i can spend all day doing it. How wrong is that? I feel so evil, how can i think like that. I want to break up with my bf so i can cut. Does anyone else think like this sometimes. That they want to push away people that they love just so you can sh?
I have found myself feeling like this a lot lately.

I see where everyone is coming from on this topic.
I don't think that it is wrong to feel any certain way. We are all human and as such we will experience a range of emotions. None of them can, IMO, be judged as wrong or right. I do, however, think that it is wrong for you or I to act on these feelings. In other words, to actually push them away on purpose would be wrong.

Maybe it is all down to the point of view you have. But, to deny yourself or to punish yourself for feeling/thinking supposedly bad things isn't a good or healthy thing to do.