How often...

[jjmcray]

Two questions.

These only apply if you are not single and have a boyfriend/girlfriend.

1.) How often do you see your boyfriend/girlfriend outside of school? (if you don't go to school, well, then, how often do you see them at all?)

2.) How often do you talk on the phone with them, and about how long do your conversations last?

[Gumleaf]

1. outside of school we see eachother a lot still. we'll still see eachother maybe for another couple of hours on a school day after school. but the fact we live in the same street makes it very easy for us to see eachother.

2. we text a lot, but usually most nights we will talk on the phone. depending on our moods and stuff, our calls will last from anything from maybe 15 mins to 3 hrs+. but on average probably about an hour a night.

[Mr. Smithers]

1.) Well this person is a lot older than me, so I can only see them on the weekends.

2.) Almost everyday, sometimes an Hour, sometimes longer.

[Fiending_the_freedom]

well i'm not in a relationship but WHEN i was,
we didnt go to the same school so i went to his house after school probably 4 out of the 5 days and stay till 8ish and on weekends go there around 2 and probably stay the night.

[byee]

This is about your other q, right? You're wondering if you're being needy, possessive and unreasonable, or of she's detached, right?

I think there's 2 parts to this. The first is the number of times you speak or how long it's for, and that depends on many things, like life in general and all it's demands and stuff.

The second part to this is the feeling you have within you about that person, that sense of connectedness to them, and from them. That doesn't change, it's pretty constant. That sense of emotional attachment is there regardless of frequency or duration of actual contact. So, I can go a while without speaking to my beloved, maybe b/c I'm really busy with something that needs to get done, yet I feel they're very close to me. Which is a function of not only, my feelings towards her, but hers to me. The actual amount of contact is irrelevant.

I reread your last post elsewhere, and i have to say that what you described doesn't sound overly needy or inappropriate on yuou part. Wanting to speak to someone more frequently doesn't make you needy, it makes you loving, you want ot be with her and connect, even if it's over the phone. Likewise, I think your insecurity here is that you lack the sense that she's really connected to you, that her not speaking isn't so much that she's just busy with life, but rather that she relly isn't attached to you, 'Into' you.

True attachement takes time, and perhaps mostly, experience and maturity. Your chica doesn't sound like she's there yet, that for her, being with you is different than it is for you, it's assymetrical. You want an attachment, she seems to want a friend.

All you can do here is really let her know what you want, and see if she can respond. iI not, you can either tolerate things the way they are, or try to find someone who's needs are more symmetrical with your own.