absolutly clue less!!

[Mcdae]

ok so firstly I am new to the forum and this is my first post.

I really just need help, advice, suggestions, some1 else personel experiences, anything will help.

but here's my problem...

I have been self injuring for a while now and a couple of my friends have seen my arms an I have had to explain everything to them, some of them have tried to get me to stop but none of them have actually effected the amount that I do it. on Friday a teacher at my school asked me to come and see her in lunch, so I went to her office and I was expecting to get told off for something, she told me to sit down but then just asked how I've been over the last few months this confused me but I said ok, she didn't stop asking about my personal life and I just tried not to say too much, after about 10 minutes she asked if I had been self harming, my instinct reaction was just to pull my sleeves down and look away from her. for some reason I wanted to trust her and I nodded she seemed slightly happy as if she just enjoyed knowing that she was right. she asked a lot of questions and near the end of lunch she said she would NOT tell my parents without telling me first and she asked for me to come back after a lesson, I came back after a very depressing history lesson and I was standing outside her door and I heard her talking on the phone to my mum. I felt like such a fool to have trusted her and I had no idea what to do at that point so I walked out of school and I just kept walking down random roads for 2 hours untill my dad drove past and noticed me, I got in the car but didn't say a word to him.

it's now 2 days later and my parents will not leave me alone!! I feel like I can't talk to them about it tho, I don't know why I just can't and everytime I go to the bathroom I can hear my dad outside listening to find out if I'm doing anything. I feel like they are trying to contol me so much an I havnt had time to think about everything because they are always around I just need space so I can think how to deal with everything. I also have no idea how to tell my parents that it's a lot worse than they think because they both assume it's just scratches but they are proper cuts and I dunno how to tell them that they can't just make me stop over night and that I want to talk to our GP about it and not them.

like I said I'll take anything I just want anything that you think could help me please.

thankyou

[Atonement]

Okay, first off, that teacher was wrong in telling your parents after first telling you she wouldn't. Its ridiculous. to betray someone's trust like that is messed up.

Though, if it is as bad as you make it out to be, take advantage of your parents knowing and reacting kindly (not angry) and get help. Really. If they are willing to help you, take advantage of that. I know what you mean when you say you don't feel like you can talk to them, but try. It will be awkward and uncomfortable, but you have got to try if you want to feel better. Sit them down and explain it. If you want them to understand, then lay it out in a way they can comprehend.

Sorry, I don't know what GP means.

Anyway, I hope it helps. Be strong and you can PM me if you ever need anything :daisy:

[ShatteredWings]

Addison; GP = general practitioner i think.. {aka regular doctor}


Anyway. i don't think it's fair that she told without at least telling you first, especialyl if she promiced.
But, if your parents know, and that they obvously are conserned, maybe you can ask them if you can maybe, like talk to the person you want to about it.


I really don't know if you could understand that, if not, sorry.

[byee]

Let's focus on the 'cat being out of the bag' here, that everyone finally knows how unhappy you are, rather than the way it came out and the teacher's betrayal of your trust. Yes, she shouldn't have promised any kind of confidentiality, but let's face it, she probably heard about these cuts from your friends, and in discussing it with you, obviously (and quite rightly) assessed that whatever you've done to yourself was serious enough that it needed to be discussed with your parents as your legal guardians. The teacher really didn't have a legal choice in that. Maybe she should have known that, but she's a teacher, not a doctor or a lawyer.

Ok, Ok. I think your folks are rightly upset and concerned about all this, and their way of dealing with that is to follow you around and be extra mindful of you and your actions. I think this is an understandable response given the rather upsetting news they've gotten, they're trying to protect you, they think their presence will somehow prevent you from cutting. It is a scary thing! The task now is to use all this attention and awareness to get you to a psychologist ASAP. It's not particularly helpful for anyone here to be in this state of high anxiety, your folks don't really know what to do, and neither do you. The therapist does, however, and in addition to treating your pain, his presence here will also provide the reassurance your folks need to relax a bit and back off, knowing a professional is working with you.

I think it might be best here to have a convo with your folks about what's been going on with you, and it doesn't need to be very specific, but some info and some sense from you about your willingness to work in therapy and attempt to learn other ways of expressing yourself will go a long way to help them better understand (or begin to understand) what's happening within you. Also, I understand that the NHS in the UK can take a while to get someone to a therapist, so you might need to talk with the GP first. However, in the privacy of that meeting, be sure to let him know the seriousness of the situation so that you can move to the front of the waiting list for therapy.

Take a deep breath, the hard part was living with all this, secretly. It can only improve from here.

[eikookmi]

I don't think it was cool that your teacher told your parents since she said she wans't going to.
With me my parents had saw my arm by accident. It was hectic the first few days when they found out. They keep badgering me with questions and i had no answers for them. They mean well and i can tell your parents care too. He's acting like that because he's scared you'll hurt yourself again and your parents don't want that.
Since you can't talk to them. And it seems like your parents care. Use this opportunity to get help so you can talk about your feelings with someone who can help you.