I can't fight back...

[Cindex]

If any of you remember, I posted a big thing before about Vanessa and Eve. I couldn't choose one so I was trying to make neither a girlfriend. Vanessa was moving back and Eve was a lifelong friend.

I tried to refuse both, but now I have both of them! I feel like a frigging whore and I don't want to hurt them... But I am.... I always prided myself on not lying to my girlfriends, and I never lied to Vanessa once until this came up. Now I end up sitting around with Eve talking and it develops too far... I don't mean to but I just can't say no!

Vanessa and I hardly get alone time because her mother has been restricting her heavily. She has her phone taken every day after practice and I can't even talk to her. We never do anything more than kissing, because I want her to know I'm not trying to just get into her pants. I've gotten to see her a few times lately, but I always end up with Eve again!

It just makes it worse that it's so easy. For years Eve and I have been the best of friends. Now when we hang out alone no one thinks anything of it. As soon as I leave it's as if it never happened. We act the same as we always have.

I'm going crazy.... I'm texting both of them as I write this. Eve is telling me about when she lost her virginity, and Vanessa is talking to me about her dad lying on his deathbead. Both of them are so close to me, and I can't stand to push either away! But I can't keep this up.. I'm ripping myself apart.

I'm so confused....

[Gumleaf]

i think you already know the answer. whether you like it or not, you can only be with one of them and you need to choose who, and do it quickly. secrets like this where you have multiple girlfriends have a funny way of getting out and the lying will eventually get out if you don't sort things quickly. i can't give you any advice other then you really need to choose who you want to be with the most and focus on them and be there as a friend only to the other girl.

[byee]

I think there's a diff btw'n a g/f and a 'friend'. Just b/c they're girls doesn't necessarily mean that your relationship has to be b/f+g/f, it doesn't have to be romantic. Girls are people first, it's really OK to have them, as many of them as you want, as 'just' friends.

I think yopu might want to clarify the expectations these 2 chicas have before you jump to conclusions and make a 'choice'.