How to talk to mom?

[Moonshine95]

Alright. This is how it is. I see things. I hear things. And I'm terrified everywhere I go.
My best friend was over the other day. We got to talking about it but I didn't tell her the full extent of everything. She said it sounded like Schizophrenia so I did loads of research.
I looked up symptoms and here are some..

Paranoia. I'm really paranoid about almost everything.

Hallucinations I guess. I see some people that other people obviously cannot. I have this friend Matthew, but no one else seems to know him. And 2 others. They talk to me. I talk back. I'm afraid when I meet new people that they aren't really real and I have no way of telling.

I swear people are always talking about me. I think they put cameras in my house to watch me but I can't find them. The way they look at me too makes it seem like they can read my thoughts.

I also have trouble organizing my thoughts. My math teacher does a lot of one on one help with me and when he asks me what some simple math questions are I take a while to answer back.

I used to be really good at paying attention and remembering stuff but that has recently declined.

I have difficulty relating to peers as well and keeping friends.

I also have really bad anxiety and I get anxiety attacks.


So I need help. Please don't tell me I need to talk to my parents or doctors. I know that. I need help telling my mom. Everytime I tell her that I think something is wrong with me she dances around it. She seems disinterested and embarrassed. And I'm really embarrassed talking to her. She once asked me if I want something to be wrong with me. So ever since then it's been hard to talk to her. She thinks I'm so smart and talented and I think that makes her think that I can't have a mental illness.
There's no doubt in my mind that she loves me. We just have communication problems and it's difficult to talk to her.

[Oblivion]

Hmmm If you can't talk to your mom about it, what about your dad?
Or maybe you could talk to a school counselor?
You should definitely be checked out, because it does seem as if you have some illness.

[Hyper]

Well you either just blurp it out straight away.. Or do the dramatic write it down on paper and hand it to her since we usually close up when we try to say what we think.

[Moonshine95]

I don't think "blurping" it out would work because she'd just shrug it off the way she did before. I think it might help if my friend was with me to help me tell her. Maybe she'd believe it if I had some one else tell her who saw it too?:confused:

[Oblivion]

Maybe leaving her a letter on your way to school, or emailing her?
Then she will have a while to think about it before talking to you,
And maybe she will realize its serious.

Other than that, I like your idea about the friend... maybe then she will realize its serious, AND you may be more calm with a friend by you that believes you

[Moonshine95]

I still need to talk to my friend about doing this. I'm sure she'll be fine with it but what if she's not? I feel like my mom won't hear it other than that way. I can't write to her because I feel like I need to tell her to her face and be able to look her in the eye. I feel like either way she won't get it, that this is serious.
How can I make her understand...:(

[Atonement]

A great w ay to talk to parents is to have a counselor there too or just another trusted adult. Maybe go to your school counselor and talk to them and ask themif they will help you approach your mom with this issue.

As for your friend, if she isn't fine with it, then sorry to say she isn't a very good friend. Trust that she will support you and if not, sorry to say that she probably isn't a good friend to trust in.

[Moonshine95]

My friend is an amazing person and she is in no way bad. I'm not trying to sound defensive I'm just saying. I don't think she'll say no to help me I'm just afraid that she'll be skeptical. If some one asked me to help them tell their mom or dad something as big as this I'd be skeptical. I'd be afraid of the parent.
I'm just so afraid that I'll have to tell my mom alone. And that's enough to make me decide not to tell her at all. She's not a bad mom, she's just a bad listener. I just don't want to have to deal with this anymore..:cry:

[Atonement]

Like I said, try talking to a school counselor. Ask them if they will help you too. They are professionals. If you ask them to be with you when you tell your mom, I am sure they iwll comply.

[Moonshine95]

I don't know if I'm completely comfortable with that. This is just a mess.

[Atonement]

Well any trusted adult would do to. And yes, it may be uncomfortable,but if you want to tell your mom enough, you will find a way.

[Moonshine95]

I guess so. Thanks for all of your help. I don't know when I'm going to tell her. The right time doesn't seem to be coming anytime soon. I'll just have to talk to my friend and then take it from there.