I have little sex drive. is that normal?

[Jean Poutine]

that's it. pretty sure it's some kind of weird now.

thing is I don't think I've felt sexually attracted to anyone past a certain age. I wasn't always like this - when I was still in the lower teens I could feel lust. I've grown older (and more stressed, I developed clinical anxiety, etc), and the feeling just disappeared.

when you hear me say I think a girl is beautiful, I mean it in much the same way that I would say that a painting is beautiful. for me, physical appearance is just another way to tug at my romantic feelings. I can feel, and I have felt, something like romantic love before...but sexual lust? no wai.

I don't think it is in my persona to enjoy sex. the simple thought of it is unappealing. first of all, being so close to someone else scares the hell out of me. I've always been very introverted, so this is nothing new. I know it's normal to be a little scared, but when it ramps up to the point where you'd keep yourself away from the world's oldest sport - is THAT normal? it seems to be blown out of proportion. I also think it has to do with the kind of relationship I seek. I hate games, I hate flirts and I also hate beating around the bush. I'm a no nonsense kind of guy. when I'll date, it'll be in search of a serious relationship with an emotional side. I would much prefer having a good girl friend than a girlfriend, if you catch my drift.

I know I would enjoy much more a relation where the only component is purely emotional. a girlfriend in words but not in deeds, if you want. one where sex is something to worry about is just...meh.

I was simply wondering if this were normal - and if there are others like me here.

[BlackBetty]

Yes it is normal....

[Oblivion]

Yep, its normal
Some people don't feel a great desire to have sex

Asexual- One who has no sexual drive/experiences no sexual desire (Not considered a sexuality by some, rather a lack of a sexuality)



Check that thread out, its very helpful ;)

[Requin]

that's it. pretty sure it's some kind of weird now.

thing is I don't think I've felt sexually attracted to anyone past a certain age. .

Hoorah! Someone like me. I feel the same way, only it's not really sex with me, it's just that I don't feel attracted to anyone. It's a pretty normal stage within puberty, not all people have it but some still do, like me for instance. So don't worry about it and let life wash over you at the moment. Don't think about it and just live your life, and forget about sex etc. I have done this and it has seemed to of worked.
It'll come back...I just don't know when, I hope soon though. Oh and don't listen to the other's who are flirting and having sex with any girl that has breasts and a pulse....some don't even care about the pulse!

So the main thing here is to not worry about it and just know that it's not a permanent thing. :yeah:

[Picard]

Redj au bureau : I have a similar problem. I do have some sex drive but it's much lower that everyone else's my age (I'm 18). However, hormones are raging in my body lately, so that >might< be the cause.
But we're only 18, and that is a confusing time of life. We are no longer boys, we're supposed to be men overnight. You are now legally a real citizen (in my country you are, when you turn 18), a part of society of adults, with all the rights and responsibilities that go with that. In a way, you're on your own now (well not really, but that's how it feels, right?), and that can scare the hell out of you. Then, put raging hormones into the (already steaming) cauldron, and you get a lot of confusion, fear and trouble. The best thing to do right now, is to relax and wait for your brain to sort it out itself, but it's easier said than done... Look at me, I'm giving advice I can't follow myself :)
Anyway, in my opinion, from 11 to 23-25 of age, nothing is abnormal. Don't worry too much (whoops, I did it again)

[Jean Poutine]

I'm relieved I'm not that much of a freak.

what made me ask in the first place is the feeling I get while thinking about the act. "dirty" is not exactly the right word...rather I feel "repulsed". you know that feeling you get all over your body when you eat something that you don't like? that is it, pretty much.

as I said though, I'm definitively not homosexual. girls don't turn me on, but boys turn me off horribly. there's a slight difference.

It's probably my hormones and other factors as you've said. I never had much of a sex drive but as I aged it completely vanished. I'm just not interested in the world's oldest sport anymore, and frankly, that's a subscription I won't have to obtain and I'm relieved.

my interest in girls, even emotionally, remains slim.

anyhow, thanks.

You are now legally a real citizen (in my country you are, when you turn 18)
in mine too.

So the main thing here is to not worry about it and just know that it's not a permanent thing.
honestly it doesn't bother me at all if it is. the way I live is a way I could see me living by for the rest of my life. I'm just not unhappy enough to really search for emotional or physical contact. although, as I said, i would prefer a relationship based on emotional support, my desire for one is still pretty small - was just saying it was preferable to secks.

Asexual- One who has no sexual drive/experiences no sexual desire (Not considered a sexuality by some, rather a lack of a sexuality)
seems like a logical explanation, and the one that fits me most. I'll consider it.

[Avalikia]

I can relate to a lot of what you said. Anxiety, especially if it's to the degree of clinical anxiety, is a huge sex drive killer. If you're still having problems with it, that alone could be the reason you don't have much interest. I've had to deal with a lot of anxiety myself for a very long time, and though I've kept it down to what I consider to be a "tolerable level" for a couple of years it's only been within the last year that my stress levels have been low enough that I'm starting to feel more interest. Even now it's a pretty low level of interest, but I suspect that it will continue to increase as my anxiety decreases. Or it could hormones. So if your lack of interest doesn't really bother you, I suggest simply waiting a couple of years and see what happens. That will give you more time to deal with your anxiety, give any hormone problems a chance to settle, etc. There's no hurry at this point anyway; you have a lot of years between now and when it will be a major issue anyway.