What's the right way to ask someone out?

[Seven Seas of Rhye]

Okay, so. I have this dance coming up, and I'm going with a friend of mine. We flirt a lot and all that crap, but I don't know. I'm still deciding whether or not I want to be more than friends. But the point is, if I do decide to ask her out at this dance, what would be the right terminology for it?

I've had girlfriends before, but they just kind of "happened". I've never had to actually ask to be together. What should I say if I do decide to do it? "Will you go out with me?" seems to vague as it could also be used in asking out on a date.

Normally I'd ask her out on a date, and if that went well continue to do that, but lately I've found that the line between "friends on a date" and "boyfriend/girlfriend" becomes fuzzy and things just turn out badly when I do that, so I kind of want to stay away from that option. But, if I do end up taking that route again, how can one tell when it turns from friends on a date into a relationship?

Also, an egotistical friend of mine who thinks he knows everything about women was telling me that there's basically no chance of getting a girl if I can't drive and if I don't ask directly ask her how she feels about me. I know this isn't something I should really be worrying about, especially knowing the person it's coming from, but crap like this always gets to me, so any words of encouragement would be nice. :D

Sorry about all the questions and the long post, but all help is greatly appreciated.

[byee]

Welcome to Vt!

Firstly, if you have a friend who knows everything about women, the rest of the male world would really appreciate him sharing his wisdom.

OK, OK. Onto you. I think the best chance for 'going out' with someone is to start by being friends first, then dating, then 'going out'. To me 'going out' means exclusivity, it means a committment to each other. That takes time, and the other, preliminary steps are required to get to know the other person (and they, you). I donlt think you can successfully skip any or find a short cut. So, in your case, i think you might want to just ask her to this dance, see how that goes, and take it from there. But, don't get too far ahead of the story here, regardless of what your past experiences might be.

[Seven Seas of Rhye]

Welcome to Vt!

Firstly, if you have a friend who knows everything about women, the rest of the male world would really appreciate him sharing his wisdom.

OK, OK. Onto you. I think the best chance for 'going out' with someone is to start by being friends first, then dating, then 'going out'. To me 'going out' means exclusivity, it means a committment to each other. That takes time, and the other, preliminary steps are required to get to know the other person (and they, you). I donlt think you can successfully skip any or find a short cut. So, in your case, i think you might want to just ask her to this dance, see how that goes, and take it from there. But, don't get too far ahead of the story here, regardless of what your past experiences might be.
Thanks for the welcome. :)

Dating first is usually the way I go, but my problem of late is that I'm not sure when dating turns into a relationship, and I don't know how to go from one side to the other. Any advice on that?

[ShatteredWings]

just. ask. her.


seriouslly, don't go all obnoxious trying to 'impress' the girl, just ask her.

you don't have an age posted, but i'm assuming you're 14 or 15, as you seem to mention you can't drive. so what? Holy crap, alot of 9th-10th graders can't! lol. that was total BS

[Indy]

And don't be afraid about dating as friends. I've done it before with a girl and it wasnt a big deal, we just had fun. We saw The Dark Knight FTW!!!!! Just don't say will you go out with me if thats what you wanna do because she might find that akward. But don't be afraid of going out as friends, thats no big deal.

[Avalikia]

If you're worried about directly asking the question, you could always ask before you ask the question: "If I were to ask you to officially be my girlfriend, would you say yes?" This question is a lot easier to ask (and for her to say no to without hurting anyone's feelings) than asking the real question because, after all, it was completely hypothetical... ;)

[broadwaydude]

I recommend that u refer to the sticky entitled like advice on asking ppl out r something but it has some good advice on asking ppl out