how can you tell?

[Medical Kid]

well lately its been hard making friends at a new school, so can I get some advice? well Ive been really nice to everyone, but it dosent seem like enough, you have to cuss like every 5 seconds just to seem normal, and I'm only 13, I shouldnt even cuss that much, so why should I be any different just for liking to be polite? does that make me nerdy or weird?

[Patchy]

right firstly dude your not a nerd or weird, I was a bit like that at your age (not that long ago I know) but eventually after a few months I got into the swing of things made friends with a few people who pulled me into a bigger group of friends. Yeah I admit I now cuss a lot cause of them but it just depends who Im with.

Just find someone to talk to and keep in contact with them and im sure they'll help you out.

[byee]

You're not 'nerdy', actually, you seem really nice.

13 is a hard age, b/c you're just starting all this stuff, adolescence is really new. So, a lot of people just don't know how to be 13 (i.e. a 'teenager'), so they do stuff that they think makes them seem older, it's like a caricature of how they see older people. Cussing is something most associate with grown ups, right? Most kids get reprimanded for cursing, so now that they're all 13, they start doing it.

Be yourself, if that means that you (thankfully) don't cuss and swear and spit on the sidewalk, if you don't horse around a lot, then don't worry about it. The good news is that most 13 year olds are so self conscious and full of themselves that they cannot notice anyone else! (That's a joke, sorta). Just be careful not to react judgementally when they do their 13 y/o thing, b/c that they'll notice. Just smile and laugh along with them, even if you don't participate.

[Nihilus]

To make new friends go join clubs and sport teams.

[DrDrDrDrDr]

just wait, you'll make friends eventual. the only thing to do is be yourself
the ultimate healer is time

[pontiacdriver]

I totally respect your decision not wishing to use vulgar language, and it definitely shows a lot of maturity on your part not wishing to use words that can not doubt offend others. It is always super hard going into a new school, and there is no magic bullet that can instantly make you accepted. If you get anything out of this post, then make sure that you be yourself at all costs, and never sacrifice your dignity or positive aspects of your personality just to fit in. It is far better to be alone and have your dignity than it is to be in a group and surrender all of your freedoms and thoughts to that of a group of people. If someone cannot accept you for who you are, then they never worth your time, period.

Regarding the use of swear words, you are definitely not a nerd for abstaining from using such words. If anything, the fact that you don't use swears shows that you are raised right and respect other folks. My guess is that the other kids are using swears to show that they are tough or "grown up," but there really is no substance behind their words. The fact that you choose not to swear demonstrates that you are more mature than those kids are at this point.

I would suggest that you do the following to expand your social horizons:

1) Get to know good kids in your neighbourhood who attend your school, and see if you can hang out with them.
2) If there is a park by your house, then see if you can meet folks your own age there.
3) If you take the bus to school, then get to know folks at your bus stop.
4) As the others have mentioned, join a school club or organization that interests you.

Your profile lists your living at Ft. Meade, and if you are a child of a soldier, then I am guessing that you must move around a lot. If you live on base, then know that nearly all of your classmates are just like you in terms of their having to move around, too, and you are not alone in feeling isolated. Perhaps some of the kids who are currently friends might have known each other from one of their parents' previous deployments or are children of members of the same unit.

Things will work out for you, and just know that a positive attitude is a big factor that is needed in overcoming an problem.

[DaretoFallup]

No, I respect you for wanting to be polite. You need to find friends who like you for who you are, that means you don't have to make yourself different. You shouldn't have to change who you are just to make friends.

Friends are out there you just have to find them, I move sooo much im still looking for my friends, I know they're out there somewhere. Keep a positive attitude, you'll find friends.

[Simonsays]

well lately its been hard making friends at a new school, so can I get some advice? well Ive been really nice to everyone, but it dosent seem like enough, you have to cuss like every 5 seconds just to seem normal, and I'm only 13, I shouldnt even cuss that much, so why should I be any different just for liking to be polite? does that make me nerdy or weird?

I'm a complete nerd, although don't really advertise it at school. I am 17, everyone knows me at school, not in a bad way. I am friends with everyone but wouldn't be considered popular, I still spend Friday nights right here in front of my monitor.

I don't cuss very much, maybe about 10-15 times a day and stray away from the f words mainly. I try to subsitute most bad words with another word that's not as bad, like frickin' a, or biotch and crap. Really the only two I ever use, ass, bastard, all that fun stuff doesn't seem as bad.

I had a tough time making friends from about 11-16. It was really tough in school, no one liked me I hung out with pretty much one person. Now I walk through school as a senior this year, and know everybody and can say hi to anyone I want. Mainly started my Junior year though, so give it some time. Everything will be alright! :)

-Nick