Girlfriend and her father, please help

[StanWhite]

Hi, my name is stan and I'm 15 years old. I've been dating a girl named Lacy for about 4 years. I honestly love her with all of my heart, and I would never do anything to hurt her. She's the springtime of my loving and the sunlight of my growing. Nobody in this world is more important to me than her.

Now, we've had sex a few times before. (don't get me wrong. I'm not a sex addicted hormone sack, and I know sex isn't nearly as important as so many other things in a relationship) One time we had unprotected sex. I really regret doing it, and I know I shouldn't risk getting her pregnant and ruining our lives. 99% of the time I wouldn't do it without protection. We were both very worried that I might have possibly gotten her pregnant, so we both decided that it would be best for her to ask her aunt for some birth control, as her mother has been dead for years. She asked her aunt, but she didn't give her any. Instead, she told Lacy's father. (whom she lives with) I was unaware of what happened at the time, and I received a phone call from Lacy. She told me to come over immediately, so I did. I arrived and rang the door bell. Her father answered the door and told me to come in. He lead me to the living room where Lacy sat with tears on her face. We all sat down. He told me that he knew about me and her having sex, and that if I spoke to her again, he'd cut my penis off with a power saw in front of Lacy. I sat there speechless, and scared out of my mind. After a moment of silence, he told me to get the hell out of his house, and that if I called the cops, me and lacy would never see daylight again. I did a he said, and ran home.

I was on the internet trying to see if Lacy would get on Windows live messenger. Luckily, she did. She told me how afraid she was. After a few minutes of talking back and forth, she told me what happened. She had gotten home from her aunt's house, went to take a shower, and a few minutes in, her father walked in the bathroom and said something like, "So this is what your fucking boyfriend has been screwing. Get your ass out of the shower and call him over." Then all of the business went down as I told you in the previous paragraph. After I left, he told her that he was serious about what he said, and that he would beat and rape her if he caught her talking to me.

We're both scared. I'm mostly scared for her. I don't want anything bad to happen to her. I don't know what to do. Please, I need as much advice as I can get.

[DarkWingedAngel]

i hope u r not serious about this because this is just horible
but just incase this is true im goin to answer and say forget about ur dick and do an anoymous call to the police and tell them that there is goin to be potental deth or rape if her dad finds out that u made the call and that he threatend u and her
that is what i would do

[Nihilus]

I dunno what too say! I would tell ur parents and so on. her father has no right to stop ur relationship. You can call the cops because he threatened you with that. I'm sorry I can't give you better advice.

[byee]

Hi Stan, welcome to Vt, I'm Sam, resident knowitall.

I believe this story, and I am truly sorry for you. You went to your aunt for help, feeling you could trust her, and she betrayed you. Shame on her a thousand times, she should have handled this better even if she disagreed with what you were doing. But that's not the issue now.

I think you and your g/f need to cool it for a while. Obviously, her father does not approve (or understand) your relationship, and for safety's sake (yours, but primarily lacy's) really, stay away.

Depending on the type of guy her father is, and the resources he has to deal with this info, he might either come to terms with it and allow some kind of contact b'twn you and her, or he might not. But, sadly, there's not much you can do at this point but not risk any contact with her for fear of what he might do. It's clearly not worth provoking or antagonizing him at this point, he's too irrational, you could both get hurt.

I would talk with lacy about this, and really work on ways for you two to keep some space for a awhile and see what he does with this as it settles in. Also, i would encourage you to help her report any further threats against her, as it would indicate that there's a real risk for her. Being angry is one thing, threatening to rape her is quite another.

I'm sorry, you were betrayed here and you might lose something very precious to you. But, unless he comes to some kind of rational response to this, the risk to her is to high. Give it some time.

[Timmarus]

Go tell the fucking cops!
He threatened you and Lacy!
He should go to jail for that.
Send an anonymous call to the police and tell them to get there IMMEDIATELY.
If he is in jail, he cannot do anything to hurt you.
Threatening to cut your penis off? Now that's just sad.
If you loved her, you would let nothing stand between your relationship.

[Matt_]

fucking cops!


Ouch.

[Sapphire]

I would tell the police about the threats he's made. You are both scared and that is a good enough reason to tell them as any other. They will probably only make a log of the event, but it will be there as evidence if he makes another threat or does something worse.

I don't think that you and Lacy should stop contacting each other for a while because you both need someone to lean on. If you have a way of communicating without her dad knowing that she's talking to you (like MSN or something) then use that. Don't risk meeting up outside of school for a while though. We don't know if he really would go through with the threats he's made so it is too risky.

[Medical Kid]

jesus christ! unprotected sex is very wrong for your age man, but really!, cut your penis off, and or rape her? no Ive heard of over protective parents, but thats INSANE! dude please be careful!

[waterplayer]

TELL SOME ONE IF HE WILL DO THAT:mad::mad::mad::mad:

[eskimogal700]

i know this will be hard, but tell your parents. if thats too hard, tell another adult you trust, like a counselor, teacher, friends parent, or neighbor, and have them talk to you about it. they can have a talk with the police, and the police will make sure that both of you are safe. good luck

[iceyfresh]

first of all thats horible and second for your and her safty make a call to the police tell them every detai of what happened and make shure that her dad is arested before he finds out of the police call and harms her and once again thats horrible and im very sory for you

[zoig]

To be honest the easiest option is to bide your time, wait until she becauses old enough and ask your parents if she can move in with you.
If the police do find out but there is no evidence to back up your claim they may not do anything and that can make her situation a WHOLE LOT worse (plus will she want her dad locking up?)
TBH is sounds like he is an over protective dad trying to put the fear of god up you (and it worked) but if you feel he is a genuine threat then really you need to keep your distance and bide your time until he can be factored out legally.

Your problems are:
1) you had underage sex, this is bad for you, if you do get the powers that be involved it wouldn't be too hard for dad + good lawer to turn this into him protecting her against your sexual assault.
2) the police really could arrest you and put you in the sex offender registers for being a nonce (I am assuming you live in the US here, don't forget a girl was done a while back for taking nude photos of herself, they are going to have a field day with you)
3) you went to the aunt (I'm assuming his sister), sibling bonds are strong and you really should have thought about not having any confidentiality, she probably "was worried about her neice" unfotunatly adults rarely factor in kids feelings into these things. Yes she betrayed you but frankly this was hardly supprising, you should have gone to your GP / Doc / FP centre (or whatever is appropriate for your situation).

Clearly this guy is scum, but as I said at this stage of the game you really have to bide your time and keep your distance from her house.
If you can go to the police with hard facts or someone who will back you guys up you can put this guy where he belongs but if they don't fall behind you will be put down as a sex offender.
Few years you will be able to tell him to go forth and multiply but for now your best bet is to talk to your parents and fill them in COMPLETELY, if they love and understand you they will be support you guys and maybe provide a few local options that I am missing.
Best of luck Stan.
True love will endure this is just one hell of a speed bump you have to get over.

[rainebg]

I don't know how to delete a post. I wrote a post and after i wrote it i read what Zoig said. This is the best response and i agree.

[zoig]

Anything happend Stan??

[Buggahh]

I'm sorry if this has already been said, and I'm sorry that you have been betrayed like this, her aunt had no right to tell him. Problems with you going to the police is he will know that it was either you or her, and you could get in trouble about the under age sex. You should talk it through with her if you go to the same school or something, confind in an adult maybe a parent, teacher or your friends mum. I know that that's not easy but you really do need to tell someone older than you that can give you more of an idea what to do and they will be able to protect you and make sure that both you and lacy are safe. Maybe lacy could stay at a friends for a while to sort things out and you could maybe see her there. Whatever you do you need to discuss it with lacy and an adult.
However he should not be able to get away with this and to the people that said he should be put into prison lacy has already lost one parent it would be even harder for her if her dad was put in prison however she would be safe. I hope this is of some help.

[NeWb TeWb]

Well , this might sound really really weird but what you need to do is get hold of your GF and both go to the police station together and then she can tell her story before her dad can bribe her into lying then you can get put into a "safe house" or looked after whilst her dad is taken care of..


Hope i helped :S

[Cindex]

Get her out. Don't let her home after school, don't go home.

Get the police. Call then and tell them to wait at your house, while you stay somewhere else. Call her dad and say you need to talk and to meet at your house. You don't want to mess with him now. Usually I'm opposed to any police activity, but this is serious. Be honest, just tell them what happened. Keep the both of you safe.

This is one F$*@ED up guy! She shouldn't be around him!

[Kiros]

Unfortunately, StanWhite logged off before the first response was even posted, and he hasn't logged in since. He probably sought help from another source and forgot about Virtual Teen, and seen as how this thread was created about three months ago, I do not think this is still as urgent as it once was. We all know how serious such a situation like this is, so unless StanWhite comes back with a response, I think it's best that no one else posts so that this public story keeps a low profile.

Thank you.

[iceyfresh]

i hope u r not serious about this because this is just horible
but just incase this is true im goin to answer and say forget about ur dick and do an anoymous call to the police and tell them that there is goin to be potental deth or rape if her dad finds out that u made the call and that he threatend u and her
that is what i would do

completely agree thats so horible

[Unknown_kid]

Say bye to your pee pee buddy.

[Zephyr]

Riiight.

If the original poster comes back to look at this thread, please PM a G-Mod or Admin to re-open the thread if that is your wish.

~Locked~