What is up with me?

[Attax]

Me and my girlfriend have been going out for almost 3 months. I left for debate camp about 2 weeks ago and got back last week, and the whole week she was talking about how she missed me, yet when I got back she never wanted to see me. And now for some reason over the past 3 days 2 of them I have just been extremely sad, and felt unloved and lonely, as I do now (I am turning here for some help or comfort at least). I can't do my summer work for school and I can't lose my grades, without them I won't get scholarships. . . and the only person who seems to care for me is her, she is the only one comforting me through this, and now today I took her home after she came over to hang out and she wouldn't even let me walk her to the door. Not even a hug goodbye. And after she left I got so sad, and it hasn't left me yet. I can't figure this out because the only person helping me through this is the one that seems to be causing it.

[thesphinx]

You have to also consider that she may have been having a bad day, in other words it may have not been you.
If you have a good enough relationship you should talk to her about it, and make sure you don't start thinking about it too hard before you talk to her because that just makes things worse.
Good luck!

[Zan0ra]

Yeah. She misses you. Give it a few days and she will be happy to see you.

[Sapphire]

It is difficult when someone you care about is being a bit out of sorts and the fact that you've been away is going to make it harder for you. But, the others are right, it may not be you that is the reason for her behaving a bit differently.
Do you have friends you can confide in a little bit or spend time with?

Talk with her. Find out if anything is on her mind. Above all, knuckle down and get some work done. It is easier said than done, I know, but it needs to get done. It will do you good to ditract yourself with it for a bit too.

[byee]

Ouch! What you're experiencing is emotional abandonment, which always hurts a lot. You went away feeling one way, believing there was a stable relationship/attachment, had no reason to even question this while you were apart, and then, upon your return, she's emotionally unavailable to you. My friend, I don't think it get's much worse than that.

I think you need to ask her point blank what is going on and if she still cares for you.

Sure, things happen, but in that context it is reasonable and appropriate to expect an explanation. You have a relationship with her, and when people are in relationships, they address eachother's concerns and provide either the explanation or reassurance the other needs to deal effectively with the change. In a relationship, attax, no one's needs are ever more important than the others. That's what 'taking care' of eachother means.

You need to ask her, and she needs to tell you, even if she is dealing with something totally unrelated, she needs to either reassure you she's still 'there' with you, or not.

[Attax]

I get what yall are saying, and things got someone better, but now she doesn't get to see me during school and she said that she feels like this is hurting our relationship so she thinks we need to talk before we break up or 'take a break.' However; everytime I ask if she wants to come over to spend time she says 'I don't feel like it.' Before school things were great! And now back to this again! I can't take this, it makes me just kind of want to die right now, why can she not see how much torture she is putting me through!

[byee]

It might be time to let go, then.

As difficult as that sounds, it might be best to detach emotionally from her. There's not much there now, it's important to assess how things are NOW rather than relive the old memories when things were good.

[Sapphire]

How long have you both been at school?
Might it be that she's under pressure from her parents to work hard at school and she wants time to relax on her own or isn't allowed out?

She is right. You both do need to talk about things before rushing to end it. If she is impossible to pin down in order to talk about it then phone her up. Talking about this over the phone isn't ideal, but it may be the best or easiest option.