I Know It's Wrong

[Dragon Fire]

Ok I know this is wrong and all, but I am finding myself attracted to my cousin who is a few years younger than myself and im 17, she is 15.. I sometimes find myself masturbating and start thinking of her and what it would b like.

When im around her i constantly look at her and i have to leave the room so i don't get erect.

I Have tried to stop this by thinking of other people or not thinking at all, but every now and then, she just comes to mind and i can't control it.

Anyone got some advice for me please???

[Ryandel]

Try to tell yourself that this is all wrong.

Im really unsure.

[Rutherford The Brave]

While we are not encouraging incestual behaviors it is ok to have fantasies. It's just hormones probably and eventually you will forget all about this.

[Dragon Fire]

Ryandel - I have tried telling myself that it is wrong, but i get more excited by it, the whole thing of it being incorrect and wrong makes it more exciting for me :S

KGTM - I would never actually do anything with my cousin cause thats just to much.. As for it being hormones I hope that you are correct and that it will pass..

Anyone else got some advice for me please?

[raiders rule]

Well, technically it wouldnt be wrong if she was like your 4th or 5th cousin because then she wouldnt be blood related, if you really want her and shes your 4th or 5th cousin i would say go for it if you want to, one of our former presidents married his cousin

[Dragon Fire]

She is my 1st cousin, blood related.. and i Don't know much about the presidents because im from Australia lol

[Ryandel]

Eh... Why not quench that excitement towards someone else?

[raiders rule]

Ok, well then your going to HAVE to focus your attention on someone or something else, if you two were ever to have sex, there could be some serious defects with that kid, i would just try to avoid her as much as i could.

[Dragon Fire]

I have tried focusing on something / someone else but it keeps going back to her.. :( i would never have sex with her though.

[Lucid]

Every time, every time she is near you, direct your attention away from her, and if you think of her, direct your thoughts away from her. Im not and expert so..

[Requin]

If your just having fantasies then that can't be helped.
It's puberty and it's a confusting time for your mind and body.
You get strange feelings and you have to control them, becuase she's related to you, tell yourself, NO!
Hope it passes soon dude.

[byee]

Fantasies cannot get you into trouble, only actions can. Being aroused by a relative doesn't mean anything other than your eyes work properly. I'm not dismissing your experience, just putting a little perspective on it. You're not actually doing anything here that is troublesome. It's the feelings that are so upsetting.

So the task is to manage the feelings better, to control them. Part of what's happening is the OK stuff of having those thoughts and images at night when you're alone has crossed over to the daytime, when you're with her. I think you've associated the intense pleasure you experience at night (which is in your head) with being with her, and you just experience her 'real time' as an extension of that. You probably have a very vivid imagination. We need to decouple that.

Two things come to mind here: First, exercise a little will power and self control. At 17, you've probably learned to control a lot of that overwhelming sexual stuff (think about your ability to control unwanted erections, for instance), and do the same when you're in her presence. You can avoid gazing at her breasts, it's not THAT impossible! Just catch yourself, be aware of the urge to look, and use that urge as a cue to NOT, before you actually gaze downward. If you use your awareness of the urges as the cue to do something else, to avoid what is about to happen, you'll be able to do just that, avoid it.

The second thing to do is to remove or modify the image/fantasy/story you have in your mind when you're alone at night 'with' her. There are a lot of girls out there that you might be able to substitute for her when you masturbate! Using another image helps decouple her from the erotic (and pleasurable) act of masturbating, so when you're with her, it won't remind you so much of how good it feels to think of her and masturbate to her.

These 2 suggy's take some time to work, you're breaking an old pattern and replacing it with a new one, but they should work. Just stay with it, and don't get discouraged.

[Maxismax123]

If she's hot, then keep jackin off to her, and if she's not.... I don't know why you do....

[The Batman]

It's not uncommon for a teenage boy to be attracted to a family member, in fact it's kinda good to be. The people we are attracted to are dependent upon the people who we are with throughout life that includes our parents, siblings, cousins, and relatives. So when we see them we actually use them to help decide what type of partner we want in future relationships rather it be the same type of person or someone completely opposite. For example, a lot of married guys actually compare their wives to their mothers. Do not worry this is completely normal and it will pass eventually.

[demon7]

if u wanted to try another method to keep her off your mind you could resort to pinching your self whenever she comes to mind or u could try masturbating before she gets to your house to calm your sex drive.

[BlackBetty]

if u wanted to try another method to keep her off your mind you could resort to pinching your self whenever she comes to mind or u could try masturbating before she gets to your house to calm your sex drive.

That is really good idea, serious.

The best thing is to try that ^^^^. Or just quite going around her and don't think about it.

[Kuervo]

hmm you and me both dude. i have a crush on my cousin also. but shes older than me

[Playamansteveo]

its ok i guess, puberty makes us like all kinds of people, even the same sex. It'll pass, just dont let it get out of control.

[pontiacdriver]

While it is not normal to do anything sexual with a family member when you are in puberty pretty much anything is going to turn you on. The best way around your situation is to think of your cousin as your sister so that any feelings you get towards her will immediately go away. I am sure no normal person would ever think of doing anything with their sister, and as long as you think of this girl as part of your immediate family, then you will be all right. Think of this girl as a friend, and when you think of something sexual about her simply laugh it off. If you equate sexuality with this girl with it being ridiculous, then you will gradually stop thinking about her looks.

You are not a freak for your feelings, but it is important that you never act on them. It is an unfortunate coincidence that your cousin is good looking, but as long as you think of her as your blood kin first and hot girl dead last, then you will be all right.