WHAT should I do?!?!?

[confusedboy]

This may get moved since I don't know where to post it...

Okay,

My dad got davorced from my mom cuz he was cheating on her.

Then he got married to the women he cheated on my mom with.

He's still married to her but says there getting "davorced" since he has a girlfriend (who I like) that she doesn't know about.

Now I see he's going to porn sites almost everday and he's been going "adult friend finders" and sites for singles!! (He has accounts with them too):eek:

MAN... is he screwed up!

WHAT SHOULD I DO? (If anything):confused:

[Requin]

That's a bummer.
Why should you do anything? In fact why should you take responsibility?
If your dad wishes to marry women then break up with them again then it's up to him.

If you mean, should i tell his current wife that he's cheating on her. Then really i don't think we can tell you the answer. You should weigh up your options, think about what would happen if you did these things, and if you have a right to do it.
Now personally i wouldn't tell his 'current' wife about it as i think she would prefer to hear it straight from the horses mouth, so to speak.
But as i said, just wait and see when he's going to divorce her. He sounds like a bastard (soz for that but...come on) so why should you clean up after his mess?

[confusedboy]

That's a bummer.
Why should you do anything? In fact why should you take responsibility?
If your dad wishes to marry women then break up with them again then it's up to him.

If you mean, should i tell his current wife that he's cheating on her. Then really i don't think we can tell you the answer. You should weigh up your options, think about what would happen if you did these things, and if you have a right to do it.
Now personally i wouldn't tell his 'current' wife about it as i think she would prefer to hear it straight from the horses mouth, so to speak.
But as i said, just wait and see when he's going to divorce her. He sounds like a bastard (soz for that but...come on) so why should you clean up after his mess?

Good thought...

You're right, why clean up after his mess? (I guess I do that alot 4 every1 lol)

[Requin]

Of course you would. It's your natural instinct as a human to protect and look after those who we know and who are close to us.
I do it sometimes too.
lol

[MrPinnick17]

Yeah I saw some pictures my dad has on his computer which were a little suggestive. I got worried and wanted to tell my mom but I didn't because I do the same thing. And I wouldn't want my dad to be on my computer and find something, then tell my mom about it. It's just kind of a respect thing, I doubt your dad is trying to find people to hook up with but you never know.

I just wouldn't let it be your business, your worried and it is kind of messed up but your dads a grown man, he can take care of himself and make his own decisions.

If you feel inclined to tell whom ever he's currently with that he's cheating then it's totally up to you.

[Zan0ra]

The above posts sorta wrapped it up for me. ;)

I think its wrong that your dad should cheat. It really can hurt someone else's feelings. In this case I would suggest you keep quiet about it for now. Do you have any proof that your dad is doing this.? After all you could be wrong.

[Jesse]

The above posts sorta wrapped it up for me. ;)

Then why'd you post?

[Zan0ra]

why did you quote me? I was going to try and think of soemthing and come back to it later.

[byee]

Yeah, when we get a glimpse into a parents private life, sometimes what we see isn't so good. And it changes the way we see them.

I guess you have 2 choices. The first is to try to recognize that parents are people, too, and that as such, they make mistakes and do some things that don't always work out too well. That's a big lesson to learn, I think most of us tend to look at our parents as 'Parents', in an unrealistic, idealized, plastic way. Try to imagine your parents as kids or teens. Hard, right? Or the sex thing. Can you picture THAT?

If you cannot wrap your mind around this new reality, that he's no longer just 'dad', but a person with flaws, then you might try to talk with him about what you know. But be clear about the purpose of the chat, it might be uncomfortable for both of you, but if you're so bothered by seeing him differently, then it might be worthwhile to talk with him about it, and find out why he's doing these things. I would suggest making the point that it feels insecure (or less secure) knowing now that his judgement isn't as good as you thought it once was, and let him respond to that.

You found out stuff about him that you weren't expecting and weren't even considering. That can be shocking, but unless all these behaviors affect you directly, it might be wise to remember that it's his relationship with you that matters the most, not whaterver flaws he might have with women or sex/porn. Those don't really affect what you have with him.

And maybe learn form his mistakes.

[TSchulz]

nothing. leave him alone. dont u ever get on porn.

[MomoRacer]

I suggest just staying out of it. taking sides may make it worse.

[confusedboy]

I doubt your dad is trying to find people to hook up with but you never know.

He has an account & was getting messages like "soandso sent you a message"

I'm just going to ignore it.

[Oblivion]

Thats probably the best thing for you to do, because
A) Hes just messing his own life up
and
B) Its not really your business

If you really feel that its not alright for him to have a wife, a girlfriend, and adult friend finder accounts at the same time, then you could tell his wife and or girlfriend

That might make your dad a bit mad though

[Sapphire]

As others have said before, it's not actually any of your business. Yes, it may hurt to find out that he's got these things going on but to start telling the others involved isn't your place or responsibility to do.

If you feel that you absolutely must say something, then talk with him about it. I don't recommend it, but it is better than telling his wife/girlfriend. If you do then expect some fireworks and try to keep yourself from accusing him of stuff.

[Gumleaf]

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