Why are all of my friends doing this stuff?

[Techno Monster]

ALL of my friends are changing, as of like, now, the LAST person I ever thought that was clean started drinking, omg, this sucks so bad.... Why am I taking all this so hard? Everybody I know is throwing their lives away, and making bad choices. Ok, so now, socializing is drinking and getting high? I really don't want to get into that stuff. GOD I wish it wasn't so damn hard! If somebody doesn't smoke, they drink or have sex all the time... am I being to uptight here? Because that is what EVERYONE keeps telling me. I wish I could find someone like me who doesn't let themselves waste away. I wish my brother would quit being so mean, and try to help me instead of laughing in my face. Right now, I feel... so alone.
Because they all do this stuff ALL the time.

[Gumleaf]

i know its hard seeing friends make bad life choices, it actually hurts to see it happen both for them and you. its also hard to know that you're doing the right thing and feel like the outcast because its fun to make stupid life choices. all you can do caitlin is try and show your friends that what they are doing to themselves will only hurt them. thats really all you can do. its their lives, and up to them to make choices. hopefully they'll learn from their mistakes and turn things around. i feel sorry for you caitlin, because i'm sure it feels like you are being punished for not making bad life choices. i hope your friends will see sense, and that your loneliness will go away.

[Nihilus]

Hey on Vt you got me. I don't do any of that stuff because I've seen the problems it creates for you and others. You have me on vt and you can go and try and make new friends.

[Underground_Network]

Caitlin, if you don't like what your friends are doing, find new friends. You're a great girl from what I know of you. You're funny, intelligent, etc., there have to be people out there that would want to hang out with you that aren't addicted to drugs or alcohol. You're seriously a great person, and if I know you in real life I would want to be your friend, if you don't like how your current friends are acting, try and get some new friends. Don't just ditch your old friends right away, just try and find some new friends as time progresses. You'll slowly see your old friends fade away, and if any of them truly like you, they'll come back to you and you can tell them that you'll only "refriend" them if they get help for themselves.

[byee]

Welcome to 14. Sometimes, people need to lose themselves in order to find themselves. I never understood that, the need to reinvent yourself in order to discover you probably weren't so bad to begin with. Maybe it's all those hormones and stuff that's so unsettling that people find these things so irresistible.

I agree with you, though, that it's unnecessary, and that you also don't need to go there with them. There are people out there who are secure enough with themselves that they don't need to get involved with this stuff, but they're harder to find. Dig a little deeper, find different sources, maybe clubs or places with different people that you share other interests with, and you'll get to them.

[Hyper]

I stand firm on the opinion that kids need to do stupid things to grow out of them or to learn how to do them maturely because they want to not because it is considered cool

[ShatteredWings]

I stand firm on the opinion that kids need to do stupid things to grow out of them or to learn how to do them maturely because they want to not because it is considered cool

says the evil 15y/o mod...:rolleyes:


but probably true... i mean not too stupid [ie not illegal like what your friends are doing], but dumb stuff.

putting it bluntly, you need new friends:yes:

[Sage]

This is why all my good friends are only known online. ._.

[Hyper]

girl;327982']says the evil 15y/o mod...:rolleyes:


but probably true... i mean not too stupid [ie not illegal like what your friends are doing], but dumb stuff.

putting it bluntly, you need new friends:yes:

Says the 14 y/o girl :P

[ShatteredWings]

Says the 14 y/o girl :P

i have moments of sanity

[AutumnDae]

Have you tried talking to them about it? I mean if you tell them what could happen, maybe they would stop. You could say that you don't want to be friends with them if they continue doing this. If you say that, go through with it.

If you keep on hanging around them and they continue to do this stuff, sooner or later something bad is going to happen. Whether it be to them, or to you. I mean your parents could find out about the stuff, and then you could get in trouble because you are friends with them Good luck.

[MrPinnick17]

I hate to be blunt because it seems like everybody else won't. It really is life, and there is nothing you can do about it. People go out and try different things on there own, especially going from junior high to high school. Your 14 so I don't really know what grade your in but yeah, drugs, sex, alcohol it's all out there and not that hard to get a hold of.

I know how your feeling, I hang out with a lot a different groups of people but one in particular all they want to do is get high. Now, that's just not my thing, I don't want to be high all the time, and I don't want to be known as a "high boy" either. I just had to let them go some, I mean we still are all friends but when they do that stuff, I just go hang out with someone else.

For all the people you loose in life, you gain. You'll make new friends.
And it may only seem like all their doing is drinking and smoking because it's new, and when things are new people tend to go overboard.

Just think about some friends you know that are clean, and don't do this stuff but you don't really talk to them that much. Now you can get to know them, and make new friends. It sucks I know, but you'll make it through and come out with more friends and a stronger person.

I just want to applaud you though, for not getting into that bull. Too many people just give in and do whatever everyone else does because they think it's "cool" or it's "what every one else is doing" but not you, and it takes a pretty strong person to be like that. I wasn't even like that when I was your age, but now I kind of wish I was...

[Zephyr]

It's part of the teenage experience...
Experimenting, pushing your boundaries.
I used to have friends calling me a dumbass,
But I turned out alright in my opinion :)
Not all of them will stay like that.
Your friends are still themselves personality wise,
Unless theyr'e the ones calling you uptight.
In that case, I assume that you dont' want to be around drugs,
Just don't be around them.
If that isn't the case, just don't be around them when they do that.

[DarkWingedAngel]

u no my friends when through that to i just did not hang around them then they called me up one day realy sick and i told them the truth and then they stopped i don't no how ur goin to turn out or how tour frinds r but they will learn from there mistakes and hopfully stop
i wish u all the best and to your friends

[Medical Kid]

Ok dude, I wont lie, I dont have any friends like that, but I KNOW where your coming from on the brother thing, older brothers always seem to act dominate, just ignore him.

[Lonewolf4211]

No, you're not uptight. You just aren't giving into peer pressure.
Kudos to you.

[DarkWingedAngel]

WOW ur not giving in to peer pressure i wish i did that

[Antares]

Dude I know where you're coming from. I felt like that too but you have to make the right choices for YOU. No one else. If they offer you something that you don't want to do do it. If they get mad at you for not doing something then they are NOT your friend. Period.
I know what it feels like to be alone. I felt the same way too with everyone getting in relationships and starting to drink and all of that stupid shit but you have to keep living you. If you have to find new people that respect you and your wishes and make good decisions like you do. You are NOT uptight because I am the same way. I refuse to smoke because that is the most disgusting, sickening, immature, etc. thing in my eyes. I am not a drinker because my family has a history of alcoholism and I am NOT going to end up like them. Sex...well...I will stay safe but the drugs and drinking and smoking will not happen for me. Nor should they for you if you dont want them to.
I suggest that you find people that have common ethics. Join clubs at school do extra-curriculars, volunteer etc. and I guarentee that you will find someone that is a compatable friend.
I wish you the best of luck.

[raiders rule]

Yeah i have some friends like that, but if they are trying to bring you down with them, sorry for the language, FUCK them. Your doing the right thing, stay with it and one day you could look back and say, hey, im glad i didnt get caught up in that shit.

[Zan0ra]

Even if they are bad choices, they are still choices. And however tempting peer pressure may be. Don't follow them. If they egg you on so much then there not a true friend.

[Sage]

The others are right. A reconsideration of alliances may be at hand...

Oooh, I love talking like that. <3

[Sapphire]

There isn't anything wrong with you. You are your own person and should only do what you feel comfortable doing. If you don't like how your current friends are, then make new ones.

Ok, so you are probably all going to hate me for this but I don't see what's so bad here. I mean, who's to say that having a few drinks is a bad choice? Who's to say that having sex is a bad choice? These are only bad choices if made for the wrong decisions and/or taken to the extreme.

Just out of curiosity, what do you (the OP) mean when you say that your friend was "clean"? How does the fact that she's drinking a bit effect this?