My life is over

[Malcolm Tucker]

Okk so 2 weeks ago, the day before I went to America, I was chatting to my friend, and it went to homosexuality (me=bisexual) and I asked "Would it really matter if --- was gay/bisexual?" He answered no. Then I considered if this was the ideal time to come out. I thought it was, so I asked "How about me? Would it matter?" He replied no again. So I went away, I didn't come out, but when I came back from America, I found out that he told all of the rest of our group of friends that I was gay, and that I was almost crying. I was furious, but I didn't think about it until that night. My friends, who from their reaction are homophobic, but I feel that my friendships are over, and that I was outted purely on a assumption, and that he had the nerve to do it while he knew I was 5,000 miles away. What do I do? I'm not ready to come out, but I can't lose my only friends....

[Rawrbaby]

Well what I would advise is just come out already. I mean it isnt going to get better and Its better than just trying to move around it. And about your friends, if they are truly your friends they will still accept you.

[Oblivion]

Well what I would advise is just come out already. I mean it isnt going to get better and Its better than just trying to move around it. And about your friends, if they are truly your friends they will still accept you.

I agree.
You shouldn't have to try to be someone else to satisfy your friends.

[byee]

Oh my gosh, how awful, Michael.

First, your issue is really with the friend you had the initial discussion with, and it's not about your sexuality, it's about betrayal. I'd recommend you calm down first, take some time to gather your thoughts (about how he made an assumption, how he then shared that assumption without verifiying it's truthfulness, AND getting your permission to tell everyone.) And I would let him have it with both barrels. Point blank, too. Then, I'd tell him he needs to make this right with the others. Finally, i'd never speak to him again.

There are just a few instances where I think that looking into the whites of someone's eyes and then really letting them have the best piece of your mind is really ever justified, and frankly this is one of those times. What he did was just beyond the pale.

[Requin]

True.
What a bastard. Really if you have to pretend to be someone else to be their friends and even when you are he just stabs you in the back then you shouldn't be friends with them.
I know this is difficult, i wouldn't want to lose my friends either but if they decide not to like you just becuase of your sexuality, you have to ask yourself what kind of people are they?
What SAM said is the best thing to do. Wair for a while, calm down, let it settle, they might forget about it after a while. It's your life, they don't control you, you come out when you feel like your ready.