Some guys at school

[RedTheViking]

At school i get teased alot cause
A) i have red hair
B) my sister was a spastic that went there and left (meaning everyone hated her and now they hate me cause im related)
C) and because i dont back down and dont take any crap from anyone, no matter who they are or how old.

i get into heaps of fights i dont even start them people just start them for no reason.
Like yesterday i was waiting in line for the canteen and this guy just pushed straight in front of me i pushed him back and he fell on his ass and i bought my things and then i walked off and he hit me in the back of the head, i stumbled and got up and kept walking. he was year 10 i am year 8.

Whenever i tell the teachers they just say dont go near them.
ive been suspended twice because sometimes i get so pissed :mad: off i hit back and the last guy i hit had a broken nose and his eye swelled up like a balloon.
ive told my mum and she keeps telling me to leave but i have my friends and the nearest school apart from the one i go to is about 15k away and too much trouble to get to.

ive been bashed a couple of times, last time i had boot marks on my back for days. It doesnt really hurt im just worried that it might escalate.

So what do i do? (apart from go to the cops )

[Oblivion]

Well after you go to the police it should clear up.

Try staying away from them, and if they pick a fight just walk away. Try going around in a group with your friends so they won't get you alone to fight. If worst comes to worst just pretend to call the police every time they come near you, and if they come to close, actually call the police.

[MrPinnick17]

I'm surprised they still fight you since you hold your own.
But maybe going to a different school might be what's best for you becuase of your safety. Do your friends stick up for you when your getting picked on? If they do maybe it'd be nice to always have one of them around to help you out. I don't know about schools and Australia but schools here in Cali have a zero tolerance for bullying, if you do it you get suspended no questions asked.

[RedTheViking]

My friends do stand up for me OUT of school , but not in school becasue their all goodie toochoes:P , my school does suspend people for bullying just theres no proof and they cant do anything that happens out of school .

[byee]

I think in order for this to change, you have to change. It's unfair, I know, for the victim to be the one who changes, but you're the one who's bothered by all this, so the burden falls on you.

Ok, you don't have control over your hair color or who your sister is, but you do have control over your reaction to all this. I think it might be best for you to 'hold your fire' and learn to tolerate the stuff that's being directed at you. Right now, it sounds like you're fighting back, probably b/c you've just had enough and you're taking it all too personally. And although that's understandable, it's not changing anything.

Try practicing self control, ignore them. It really does go away when they don't get a reaction from you. It's OK to let someone cut ahead of you, it's not personal. Make a sustained effort at being 100% here, just don't show your feelings.

[Hyper]

I think in order for this to change, you have to change. It's unfair, I know, for the victim to be the one who changes, but you're the one who's bothered by all this, so the burden falls on you.

Ok, you don't have control over your hair color or who your sister is, but you do have control over your reaction to all this. I think it might be best for you to 'hold your fire' and learn to tolerate the stuff that's being directed at you. Right now, it sounds like you're fighting back, probably b/c you've just had enough and you're taking it all too personally. And although that's understandable, it's not changing anything.

Try practicing self control, ignore them. It really does go away when they don't get a reaction from you. It's OK to let someone cut ahead of you, it's not personal. Make a sustained effort at being 100% here, just don't show your feelings.

Sorry don't agree with you there.. Fighting back is the best thing. Infact if someone pushed me I'd push them back without a second thought. If they tried to hit me I'd problably break their face to tiny pieces, you can't ignore real violence unless you want to sit in a corner in the fetal position never fighting back.

Self control is always a good thing, changing your image if YOU want to is also a good thing.

And no it doesn't go away with ignoring it, it goes away with ignoring when your in kindergarden or primary school. If people are bashing you with their feet then you either kick the shit out of them, change schools, or fight for yourself.

If they just hate you because of your sister and your hair color then they might never stop, I don't kow how big it is or what kind of people their like but they sound like the kind who you just have to defend yourself against..

Bleh I'm off course. I'm not really sure what to do.. I sometimes think my own experiences clowd my judgement or that I just don't understand how things work elsewhere. But for me the only thing that would've helped in the end was broken bones and blood for people who tried to do the same to me

[sabotaged111]

Sorry don't agree with you there.. Fighting back is the best thing. Infact if someone pushed me I'd push them back without a second thought. If they tried to hit me I'd problably break their face to tiny pieces, you can't ignore real violence unless you want to sit in a corner in the fetal position never fighting back.

Self control is always a good thing, changing your image if YOU want to is also a good thing.

And no it doesn't go away with ignoring it, it goes away with ignoring when your in kindergarden or primary school. If people are bashing you with their feet then you either kick the shit out of them, change schools, or fight for yourself.

If they just hate you because of your sister and your hair color then they might never stop, I don't kow how big it is or what kind of people their like but they sound like the kind who you just have to defend yourself against..

Bleh I'm off course. I'm not really sure what to do.. I sometimes think my own experiences clowd my judgement or that I just don't understand how things work elsewhere. But for me the only thing that would've helped in the end was broken bones and blood for people who tried to do the same to me

Agreed!

[RedTheViking]

so what ur saying is fight back? i do fight when its one on one but i bash one then about 4 come on to me and my friends wont do anything in school and we all walk a diff way home so they cant help me when im walking home. ive tried saying ill fight you one on one here and then about 8 of them turn up and when i start winning they all jump in so what?

[george]

You know honestly, I'd say have some type of weapon or, a much better way, tell the police about this. But yeah, weapons always turn the tables whenever its 1 v alot. I'm not saying like bring a gun or knife to school or anything like that!! Idk maybe have a really sharp pencil? But tell the police about this first!!

[Zephyr]

Don't fight,
It never solved anything.
Just get a few people to stand witness to you being bullied.

[george]

Like cops :) Or people that will and can actually do something about it eg. teachers, parents?, the principal?

[serial-thrilla]

i dont believe in tattling. you'll lose alot of respect from the entire school. I think your doing a good job standing up for yourself. dont take shit from anyone.

[kerry]

Sorry don't agree with you there.. Fighting back is the best thing. Infact if someone pushed me I'd push them back without a second thought. If they tried to hit me I'd problably break their face to tiny pieces, you can't ignore real violence unless you want to sit in a corner in the fetal position never fighting back.

Self control is always a good thing, changing your image if YOU want to is also a good thing.

And no it doesn't go away with ignoring it, it goes away with ignoring when your in kindergarden or primary school. If people are bashing you with their feet then you either kick the shit out of them, change schools, or fight for yourself.

If they just hate you because of your sister and your hair color then they might never stop, I don't kow how big it is or what kind of people their like but they sound like the kind who you just have to defend yourself against..

Bleh I'm off course. I'm not really sure what to do.. I sometimes think my own experiences clowd my judgement or that I just don't understand how things work elsewhere. But for me the only thing that would've helped in the end was broken bones and blood for people who tried to do the same to me


I agree if someone hits you , you should hit them back it is self denfence

[WahhLa]

just be very nice to them. or tell your most caring teacher.

[byee]

so what ur saying is fight back? i do fight when its one on one but i bash one then about 4 come on to me and my friends wont do anything in school and we all walk a diff way home so they cant help me when im walking home. ive tried saying ill fight you one on one here and then about 8 of them turn up and when i start winning they all jump in so what?


Thanks for confirming the wisdom of my advice here.

It might feel better to think that fighting is the answer (and it might be easy to suggest that), but the reality is that violence rarely stops the problem.

The goal here is to stop the behavior, not to make a statement about your 'macho ness', or improve your reputation, but to stop the behavior.

The easiest way to stop the behavior (when you take out all the ego involved), is to get the biggest weapon you can. Which in your case, isn't your fists, but your brain (something your tormentors seem to lack much of). Brawn is really never a match for brains. That's because people who use their brawn to intimidate others are really just cowards, and the easiest way to beat a coward is to outsmart them and shine a light on their impotence.

People with brains go to the people who have the REAL power to stop the behavior, which in your case are the school authorities. Tell your folks, make a plan with them to meet with those authorities, and stop the behavior. It's not 'Tattling'. It's true intelligence. and its the best weapon out there. Use it.

[WahhLa]

yeah i think that would be better. martial arts takes brains though. not 8 on one.