help pleaseee

[krystalm]

okay i've been diagnosed with depression, pstd, anxiety, eds, i have ocd like behaviors and what not.. but my sister who went to school for this told me i always looks like a paranoid scitzophrenic, and lately i've been learning more about it, but don't know if its a result of some of the other things or not.. i always hear people calling my name, and go around my house asking who called me, or i hear someone in my house when it's empty.. i also swear to god i always think someones watching me. ecspecially when i'm showering. and when i go to the bathroom i always check the shower, i put things under my bed so nobody could hide under it, if i'm home alone i won't leave my bedroom. i compulsivley pick at scabs. when i go upstairs or downstairs i run, because i'm almost positive that something is running behind me. i make sure all doors are locked and its a joke in my family. if there is only two people in the car i'll make sure to sit all the way in the back so i can be sure nobody is in it us.. i'm almost positive that people are talking about me all the time. aoprdvhoahfv' i know i should ask my therapist, but i don't want to unless i'm just over reacting because maybe this could lead back to sexual abuse i endured as a child.. alsso i've had alot of these symptooms since i was 7-8 after the abuse.. and when i use to go to the bathroom, my mom had to drill a whole from the kitchen to the upstairs bathroom , and she'd stick a broom in the hole so i would know that she was there, but i'd still run. and no matter where i go, no matter where i live, i'm almost positive the people before put in video camreas and are watching me. i also have really absurd thoughts and my mindset is always insane. helppp

[byee]

I am so glad for you that you are in therapy, it will be a great place for you to understand all of this and make it go away!

I really doubt you're schizophrenic, your thoughts are logical, you make sense. You think clearly. Your emotions are consistent with the stuff you talk about.

I DO think that so much of what tortures you is the result of your history, though. All those symptoms seem like they could have been caused by the horrible stuff you've endured. Eventhough you're safe (thankfullly!), and it's all over, the memories are still quite vivid, and so are the intense feelings.

With time and therapy, though, they'll fade, and with them, the symptoms. Tell your therapist, not so much b/c she'll come after you with a butterfly net (she won't), but so she has a fuller understanding of what your experiences are, thereby helping you better.

Consider going more frequently, too.

[krystalm]

thankyou, everyone jokes around that i act like i'm schizophrenic, and yes i know its from history, i'm reading a book and it says that schiz. can be caused by trauma so i was like oh god... this sort of sounds like me.. right now i'm just trying to target anything that i'm dealing with and it doesn't help that my psychologist always brings on another disorder.. next i'm going in for adhd after my anxiety gets better?... i wish i could get a new psychologist but every doctor i've been too uses her and she helped me find my counselor, but she thinks i have all these disorders, and it makes me feel like i'm a hypochondriac, but maybe i really do have them... i wish i could go more frequently but she is only open 3 times a week :/ thats why i joined the forum!

[byee]

Ok, I'll put you on my "watch list" and keep an eye out for your posts. Anything I can do to help!

Schiz. is a biological condition, it can NOT be brought on by psychological issues. Schizophrenics can have psychological issues ('Environmental" or emotional things), but it cannot cause it. And, Schizpohrenia is NOT a 'split personality'. Your personality is whole and intact (unless you have the exceedingly rare multiple personality disorder, the chances are so low as to be almost impossible). Rather, the "split" in schiz. is with reality, schizophrenics aren't in complete touch with reality, their reality testing is impaired. That's not you. You're in touch with your reality. Too much so, I might add. It's overwhelming you.

Stick with the therapy, and if your doc is overwhelming you with all these diagnostic things, tell her to stop doing that. It doesnt sound like you need someone to figure what you've got (you probably already know what that is, anyway), but rather just be there with you, and help you sort thru all this. And find better ways of dealing with it.

[Mr. Smithers]

I remember when l felt the same way. I'm glad I got the help for it though. I can worry less now. I don't have to remember to lock the door always. That was a big one. The even biggest one was the back seat thingy. I was always like that. I would always get up from the computer because I thought my named was being called from around the house. Its crazy. I had to see doctors and take medication for that though. :(

[Skeln]

This does not sound like paranoid schizophrenia. It sounds like paranoia. Although...one symptom of paranoid schizophrenia is delusions of persecution. Do you experiance anger, anxiety, violence, and delusions of grandeur? But I dont think you have schizophrenia.