Important help me please.

[Scuicide by star]

Hey, i have a huge problem, well actually my sister does but i consider it mine.

Ok, so my sister is 12 atm and doesnt hang out with a great group of people.She has just confessed to me AND my mom (mom and dad are divorced dad is a dickhead) that she loves the smell of marijuana and wants to try it and maybe some other drugs that her friends say are good. She has also planned with one of her friends to get shitfaced over the summer then have another friend take care of them when they get sick. She also wants to have sex with a boy she just met 4 days ago. My mom isnt helping at much either, she has said that if she does drugs that she will send her to juvi. But she has told her that she has to wait 6months to drink, and wait till 15 to have sex. My family has had a history of drug addiction and an addiction to alcohol. My mom hasnt ever done drugs and doesnt drink because it makes her sick even with just one drink. We have explained to her that she will get addicted easily to that stuff if she tries it because of the history of our family but she doesnt care. I also have a younger sister who is 5 (different dad) and looks up to my 12 y/o sister alot. My mom has raised both me and my 12y/o sister the same exact way but we have turned out completely different, Im 16 and I dont like the idea of drugs and alcohol tastes gross. Im afraid that my sister is just going to start doing that stuff and i will loose her, and then she will influence my youngest sister to do the same. Although my 12y/o sister thinks i hate her and she does hate me I love her to death, I love my youngest sister just as much and dont want to lose either of them. IDk what to do and my mom isnt helping much.

Please help me!


EDIT: She is an unstable person and i have no doubt that she would go on to worse stuff then weed like meth and heroin.

[byee]

Typically, if 12 year olds want to break THOSE rules and get away with it, they don't tell their mothers! So, let's assume that your sister is intentionlly being provocative here, for a reason maybe you can find out. Does she need the attention? Is your mom really 'not there' for her, and this is her way of trying to get her more involved?

2 things come to mind here. First, you might talk with your mom about this, and try to get her engaged with your sister in a good way to provide some structure AND attention. You might be able to act as the diplomat and interpreter for your sister, if mom doesn't quite understand what sister is trying to say, and what she hopes to get. help mom understand and respond.

The second thing you might do is to explain to your sister that what she's saying is really unacceptable and you hope she's just kidding, and you want her to stop. It's really amazing sometimes what happens when you tell someone who's saying something really outrageous to just stop. Maybe she just needs to hear that. I think if you're mildly confrontational you might get her to back down, to see that drugs and sex at 12 is not going to achieve what she thinks it will, at least with you. Then, you can work with her to get the attention from you (and mom) in ways that are more appropriate.

In the end, though, there's not much you can do if someone is determined to do something, even if it's really bad stuff. However, in her case, I think she's looking more for attention, rather than actually informing you of her plans.

Set some limits, then offer what she might be after.

[MrPinnick17]

If your the older sister, you should talk to her. My brother had a talk with me about something when I was younger, I don't do what I was doing anymore and probably never will. She looks up to you also, tell her what's up.

[Scuicide by star]

Thanks alot guys. It helps a huge amount.

[Nihilus]

Ok since you are older I would talk to her. Tell what happens to your body when you smoke marijuana (the bad thing), When you drink. The thing about her wanting sex, she has to wait until 16 or else its a type of rape ( Sorry I forget what it is). You should tell her the risk of the sexually transmitted diseases and that she can get pregnant. I hope all goes well with you and your sister.