Opening mail

[Maverick]

My dad seems to think its OK to open my mail. I don't get that much mail but I get regular bank and credit card statements and various other things. It really pisses me off that he does this. We get along very well but I don't think opening my mail is right. I have nothing to hide but I don't feel I need to be monitored in such a way and I don't think its any of his business.

I am 18. I don't want to make a huge deal of this and give the impression I'm hiding something. Should this be something I have to deal with until I can get my own place and move out? Do other older people deal with this?

[ScotsGirl]

My mum used to think it was ok to do that too!

I told her it wasnt, and that it was illegal.
It was mainly my bank statements.
We had a chat about it all though, she said she was "just making sure". And I said that if I needed her input/advice about money I would come to her.
And unless I specifically asked her to do it, could she stop.

And thankfully, she did :-)

I think a lot of it was due to her general nosiness of what I was spending money on though.

Maybe you could talk to your dad about it? Let him know how it makes you feel and that you think he is invading your privacy. But reassure him, if you need his advice that you know you can come to him. I dont know if you would have the whole "you've raised me, so believe in what you have raised" chat with him or not.
Sorry I'm not much help!

xxx

[Gumleaf]

well i can't speak for myself unless you include my mum trying to read love letters from my girlfriend. but my mum always opens my sisters mail, be it bank statements and other stuff and she is 21. so i think its quite common. and oh yeah, she gets pissed off about it too.

[theOperaGhost]

My mom opens all of my mail. Mainly the only mail I get is bank statements though. But I don't have anything to hide, because I don't spend any money. I'm 18 btw. I also get a lot of mail from colleges, but that's about it.

[Oblivion]

Both my parents are very nice about privacy :D My mo could see anything i say with my phone, or in the mail or anything... But she just doesn't :D same with my dad :) Im just lucky i guess... They would NEVER open my mail :jester: (My new fav smiley)

[Maverick]

Well I figured out that I can get electronic bank and credit card statements through email and opt out of mail statements so I decided to just go with that.

I pick my battles and I don't want to bother bringing up so no one takes anything the wrong way.

[Sugaree]

My parents have never opened my mail. It's always been given to me for me to open not them.

You just need to tell him that if there is any mail for him then put it in your room or the kitchen table so that you can see and deal with it. Tell him it's not his bussiness and that you aren't hiding anything.

If he keeps at it then get a P.O. box at your local postoffice so that he can keep away from your mail.

[Patchy]

I got that when I was 13..it really bugged me because my mum was looking at all my bank statements even though its nothing to do with her

I confronted her about it and we agreed that she wouldn't open it since as she put it "if it bothers you so much then fine I won't"