Is It me or him?

[Tree]

Ok so for some reason its extremely hard for my boy friend to get me off. And I know girls take longer and all that stuff, but this is different. Like I try so hard to just concentrate on it, and after like 30 minutes, I still don't. Unless I move around in some weird position or something. He's starting to get really frustrated with me and I don't know what to do. And I know it can't be him cause he's wonderful at it and I love him more than anything and don't want to keep getting him mad. Anyone have any suggestions?

[Gumleaf]

general puberty - r&d

[Maverick]

Just to make sure, this is about when you two have sex right?

[ThatCanadianGuy]

Looks like it to me. Does he know WHERE to touch you and things? Just show him what you do when you masturbate (how you rub it; whatever). Of course I'm assuming that you do masturbate. If not, then START :D. Once you know for yourself what "gets you off" then it will be really easy to TELL HIM what to do. The key thing here is communication; you can't just let him keep blindly going at it and HOPE for the best. If you aren't comfortable with talking about your sexuality and sexual things with him; then you're not ready for sex and shouldn't be at this point.

If you ARE looking to improve, showing him what YOU would do to get yourself off is the only really good solution.

[Tree]

Yeah I've been there, done that. It still didn't work. He just gets more frustrated with me, and then it gets me frustrated with myself.

[sabotaged111]

Looks like it to me. Does he know WHERE to touch you and things? Just show him what you do when you masturbate (how you rub it; whatever). Of course I'm assuming that you do masturbate. If not, then START :D. Once you know for yourself what "gets you off" then it will be really easy to TELL HIM what to do. The key thing here is communication; you can't just let him keep blindly going at it and HOPE for the best. If you aren't comfortable with talking about your sexuality and sexual things with him; then you're not ready for sex and shouldn't be at this point.

If you ARE looking to improve, showing him what YOU would do to get yourself off is the only really good solution.

^^ THIS IS GOOD ADVICE

any way if hes getting frustrated, hes not exactly and ideal boyfriend. He should support you and help, it all about teamwork, after all it takes two:D

[ScotsGirl]

A girls orgasm isnt just physical, its psychological as well. I have to agree ^^ the fact he is getting so frustrated, is hardly going to turn you on... :eyebrow:

It seems like there is a whole LOAD of pressure for you to orgasm, not just from him but from yourself as well. Its hardly surprising that you havent been able to.
I think you (and him) need to try and concentrate less on orgasming, and more on feeling the pleasure and enjoying yourself. The orgasm will come (excuse the pun :P ).

It might be an idea to explain to him that your orgasm isnt just about having the right technique. Maybe have an evening of relaxation and communication (starting with massages, leading on from there...) everything nice and slow. Like TheCanadianGuy said, show each other what you like and what feels good. Communication is key.
The moment you forget that you need to orgasm, will probably be the moment you actually just do it.
Have fun! :-)
xxx

[Hyper]

A girls orgasm isnt just physical, its psychological as well. I have to agree ^^ the fact he is getting so frustrated, is hardly going to turn you on... :eyebrow:

It seems like there is a whole LOAD of pressure for you to orgasm, not just from him but from yourself as well. Its hardly surprising that you havent been able to.
I think you (and him) need to try and concentrate less on orgasming, and more on feeling the pleasure and enjoying yourself. The orgasm will come (excuse the pun :P ).

It might be an idea to explain to him that your orgasm isnt just about having the right technique. Maybe have an evening of relaxation and communication (starting with massages, leading on from there...) everything nice and slow. Like TheCanadianGuy said, show each other what you like and what feels good. Communication is key.
The moment you forget that you need to orgasm, will probably be the moment you actually just do it.
Have fun! :-)
xxx

^ That, do what works for you just without the ''need an orgasm'' part