Crush likes another girl

[ZzeWatermelon]

So my crush is into this cute girl all guys are hitting on basically, and our common friend knows about the crush, and he told me that once my crush is over that girl, and he will be over apparently, like all guys that are hitting on her, he'll gravitate towards me cause he knows that I have great chances to be with that guy.
So when will he lose interest in that girl? 2 months, 3, a year? Is my friend right? I believe he is...

[Zachary G]

its really hard to say, its kind of a hit and miss situation, so all you can do is be patient and see what happens.

[ZzeWatermelon]

Thanks for answering so fast x)

[Uniquemind]

You have no choice to play the waiting game.

I don't think 3 months is enough time, minimum I'd give it 6 months, if and only if this new girl doesn't give this boy (your crush) any attention.

Speaking from experience you never want to be the rebound person if, from your perspective, you're wanting a serious relationship.

[ZzeWatermelon]

Cause my friends are saying that all guys will stop being on her at the end of this month (october)

[Uniquemind]

Cause my friends are saying that all guys will stop being on her at the end of this month (october)

If this timeline is fact, and not conjecture, then this leads me to believe there's a small group of boys playing some contest to see who can "get with" the new girl.

[SillyShyGuy]

I am going through that too with this girl I like. It might take a while for him to get over that other girl. Be patient, believe me us guys are really dumb. We do not know how to weigh our options until it is too late. This guy should see you as the catch you are.

[ZzeWatermelon]

If this timeline is fact, and not conjecture, then this leads me to believe there's a small group of boys playing some contest to see who can "get with" the new girl.

Can you explain more? Cause I don't get it.

[Uniquemind]

Can you explain more? Cause I don't get it.

Can you be specific on what you're confused about?

I thought I was clear, with my post being self-explanatory but maybe not.

If you can PM me with updates on the situation and perhaps I can also clarify what I meant. I feel like at this point I'm bumping this post unnecessarily and since it's just us two in a dialogue perhaps a PM is better.

[Melodic]

I'm not sure about the guy himself or the situation. But, I wouldn't actively try to go for a person who's dating life has an expected expiration date.

[ZzeWatermelon]

Okay, and another thing - he always stares at me!!! XD

[AutumnWinds]

So my crush is into this cute girl all guys are hitting on basically, and our common friend knows about the crush, and he told me that once my crush is over that girl, and he will be over apparently, like all guys that are hitting on her, he'll gravitate towards me cause he knows that I have great chances to be with that guy.
So when will he lose interest in that girl? 2 months, 3, a year? Is my friend right? I believe he is...

honestly there are too many variables. all you can really do is try and spend time with him and see if he ends up friend zoning you or not.

on the plus side, i have found that cleavage is great for keeping the friend zone at bay. ;)

[Uniquemind]

Let's also not forget that just because a person has a crush on one person doesn't rule out the possibility that the person can't have 2 or more crushes.


Perhaps he's as confused about his urges and feelings too.

Maybe he's closer to you emotionally, and is just lusting after the pretty new girl.

[ZzeWatermelon]

We actually got much closer to each other than we were before. And now he makes dirty jokes all the time, so is he interested in only that?
And also he touches me a lot, strokes my hair, and looks at me often.
But he's still into her. He does it to her too. But we're the only 2 I think he does it too. Although the dirtier jokes are stronger towards me... :/

[Uniquemind]

We actually got much closer to each other than we were before. And now he makes dirty jokes all the time, so is he interested in only that?
And also he touches me a lot, strokes my hair, and looks at me often.
But he's still into her. He does it to her too. But we're the only 2 I think he does it too. Although the dirtier jokes are stronger towards me... :/

He sounds like a player now, just trying to get sex...

Be careful and really make sure he respects you and genuinely cares for you k?


But it's time for you to genuinely ask him how he feels about you.

[ZzeWatermelon]

He's like 16 though. Is that possible that he's such a player...? At that age?
I think he's just a horny teen.

[Uniquemind]

He's like 16 though. Is that possible that he's such a player...? At that age?
I think he's just a horny teen.

Anybody can be a player at any age.

Being horny, is often a strong motivator for males to be promiscuous I think.

[ZzeWatermelon]

My friend says that he stares at me (cause I know he does, I feel it) and she says she caught him staring at least three times, at me.

[kenoloor]

good lord, anyone telling you to wait for him is off their rocker. never ever wait for a boy. ever. live your life, get a pen pal, volunteer at the local food pantry, learn a language, listen to music, write really shitty poetry. do ANYTHING but wait for a boy.

first of all, boys ain't shit (let's be real, y'all, boys are clueless fucks).
second of all, if you're just going to sit around and let your life become stagnant while waiting for some clueless boy to "finally see you," then what will your life be after that (assuming that will indeed happen)? you'll just be dating, but you won't be any closer to self-actualising (you'll probably be further away, tbh) and that sucks.

to sum it all up, boys aren't worth waiting for. if the timing works out, then hooray, you can date one. if it doesn't, please please please do not wait for him.

[DoodleSnap]

good lord, anyone telling you to wait for him is off their rocker. never ever wait for a boy. ever. live your life, get a pen pal, volunteer at the local food pantry, learn a language, listen to music, write really shitty poetry. do ANYTHING but wait for a boy.

first of all, boys ain't shit (let's be real, y'all, boys are clueless fucks).
second of all, if you're just going to sit around and let your life become stagnant while waiting for some clueless boy to "finally see you," then what will your life be after that (assuming that will indeed happen)? you'll just be dating, but you won't be any closer to self-actualising (you'll probably be further away, tbh) and that sucks.

to sum it all up, boys aren't worth waiting for. if the timing works out, then hooray, you can date one. if it doesn't, please please please do not wait for him.

This is good advice. First of all, you'll never really know when he is ready to move on, based on conjecture. People are far too irrational and complicated to work on a scale like that. The only way to truly know is to talk to them about it.

Secondly, as the quoted says, you can't spend your life waiting for someone. Heck, you don't even know if they are right for you yet, and if they aren't, you will have spent months and months waiting for someone who isn't suitable.

You just need to be pro-active, work on doing things for you. Grow yourself, meet lots of new people, and see where the wind takes. By law of averages, I'm sure you'll end up meeting someone who you maybe wanna pursue a romantic relationship with. You're young, and you're surrounded by opportunities, so why wait?

Good luck.

[ashdyn]

Your crush is probably just showing interest in her cause all the other guys are. Kinda like she's the cool new toy. Just make sure he knows you exist and be friendly with him so when this girl kinda falls off you'll be perfectly positioned already lol

I don't know how old you guys are but y'all sound younger. The younger you guys are the faster he's gunna be over that girl. Like if you guys are in middle school it'll probably be next week. Lol good luck!

[ZzeWatermelon]

They're 14/15, I'm 16 ;)

Yes I'm being as friendly and close to him as possible, I even joined his band lol.

[ZzeWatermelon]

Oh and btw my friend asked him who we liked and he what he thought about her, and he said that he didn't like anyone especially, and that he found her cute but he wasn't that into her either.
So I've got more chances now xD