I need help asking this girl [14/f] out on a date or to homecoming. (I am [14/m])

[Zantronix]

OK. So I met these really cool girls in a group chat that was set up for one of my classes. I got to talking with them and we talked like really late (this was over labor day weekend). We made our own group chat with the three of us and chat on/off daily. Both of these girls are into the same music, you tubers, and shows that i'm into, but i like one more. I have 2 classes with them and meet in the mornings to chat. I have been trying to figure out how to ask her out but I can't figure it out. We hung out at a school football game, and while there this girl behind us asked if me and the girl I am not interested in were dating. I sort of gave a blank stare because I was dumbfounded, but the girl i was sitting next to quickly said "What? No! we have only known each other for like less than 2 weeks!" and i added "Yeah! why would you think that Hahaha". Because of that i think that i shouldn't ask the one i'm into out, as her friend that we weren't dating BECAUSE we hadn't known each other that long. Also at that game i asked if either were going to homecoming and if they had dates, and they replied with "Oh yeah we are going with a bunch of our friends, you should too! And we are each others dates!" (I have confirmed that they are not lesbian and were joking). So you see the predicament i am in. I want to ask her out but i don't want to ruin the friendship and stuff. They are also best friends and always sit together and i can never talk to one alone. I *think* the one i want to ask out might be into me, because she looks at me in class a lot, but i don't know. Should I wait? Go for it? If i go for it how do i do it? No chance? Thank you for any advice!

P.S. I have to add i am a fairly handsome guy and get along well with both of them, and i am also kinda in the same "social class" as them at my school

[hockeyboi99]

Well, you'll never know if you don't try, right? Never an easy situation to be in when it involves two friends. Much less best friends. But you should never let a possible opportunity pass. If it goes bad at least you know you tried and that counts for a lot. Stepping out of your comfort zone is important when it comes to asking a girl out. Perhaps you should give it some time before you make your move? Get to know her a bit more, and try to subtly showcase your interest in her to see if she drops any hints that she may return your interests.

Some girls won't show show their interest until you show yours first in fear of rejection.

I can't give much advice as to how to ask her out. Most of my past relationship experiences were having the girl ask me out. You don't have to do anything extraordinary though. Simply tell her that you like her and would like to know if she'd be interested in going out with you. It could be pretty complicated if her friend really does have feelings for you however. I'd give it some time and observe the way both of them act around you. Try to detect any signs and etc.

Hope all works out well for you!

[kayla...]

Better to try and fail than not know what could be

Just be yourself and sincere about wanting to spend time with her

[Zantronix]

Well, you'll never know if you don't try, right? Never an easy situation to be in when it involves two friends. Much less best friends. But you should never let a possible opportunity pass. If it goes bad at least you know you tried and that counts for a lot. Stepping out of your comfort zone is important when it comes to asking a girl out. Perhaps you should give it some time before you make your move? Get to know her a bit more, and try to subtly showcase your interest in her to see if she drops any hints that she may return your interests.

Some girls won't show show their interest until you show yours first in fear of rejection.

I can't give much advice as to how to ask her out. Most of my past relationship experiences were having the girl ask me out. You don't have to do anything extraordinary though. Simply tell her that you like her and would like to know if she'd be interested in going out with you. It could be pretty complicated if her friend really does have feelings for you however. I'd give it some time and observe the way both of them act around you. Try to detect any signs and etc.

Hope all works out well for you!


Thanks for the advice! Homecoming is soon but i don't think ill be dealing with that... Ill be sure to get to know her better and to drop some hints. Just one more question- is a "hint" like saying "i like your shirt today" or "Your hair is very nice today"? because that kinda just seems like a general complement and anything more than that seems like it would be obvious (I.E. saying she is hot to her face or something).

[hockeyboi99]

Thanks for the advice! Homecoming is soon but i don't think ill be dealing with that... Ill be sure to get to know her better and to drop some hints. Just one more question- is a "hint" like saying "i like your shirt today" or "Your hair is very nice today"? because that kinda just seems like a general complement and anything more than that seems like it would be obvious (I.E. saying she is hot to her face or something).

It can be something smaller than that. Something as simple as body language can be a hint.

[ImCoolBeans]

Well, do you want to be her friend, or her boyfriend? At some point you need to make your intentions clear to her in some way. Whether you tell her how you feel, ask her to the dance, or what, otherwise she might either move on or just consider you to be a friend after a while.

I would rather be the guy who tried and failed than the guy who missed his chance, I say go for it and ask her out. Just be yourself, and do it in person, she will appreciate it a lot more in person.

If it doesn't work you could always ask the other one out xD

[Daniella98]

Be your self and let her know you are attracted to her and be confident about it.

[Uniquemind]

Ask the one out you want to ask out.

Do not hesitate to be politically correct in the emotional arena.


There's a window of opportunity in timing you need to seize, also there's a saying "all's fair in love and war".