Boyfriend lockdown

[SmokyChica]

My boyfriend and I have differences on sex. He's a virgin and I'm not, and he wants to save himself for marriage, but we started doing some things. We talked about sex earlier and I said I do in face want it, and he does too, but it led to a whole discussion that ended with him not truly wanting to have sex with me... I know I shouldn't take it offensively, I think it's just because of his religious beliefs, and I want to respect that but at the same time it hurts. I have a bad time dealing with rejection, and I don't know what to do with myself now that he said we should stop doing anything sexual. Any advice?

[Babs]

If he doesn't wanna have sex, then he doesn't wanna have sex. There's not much you can do there. It's not because he doesn't find you attractive or anything, nor is it rejection. It's just his religious beliefs, I suppose, and you ought to respect that.
If sex is that important to you in a relationship, then obviously you two are looking for different things. If you don't see eye-to-eye, you should decide if you're okay with not having sex. And if not, then there's no point in staying in a relationship you're not happy in.

[SkyClad33605]

I would respect his decision not to have sex and end the relationship. Sex is fine and perfectly healthy, and don't let him shame you for wanting it. But you clearly don't agree with his religion, so I would end it. Just be friends and be happy with that. If he wants you to respect his beliefs he should respect yours. Again, don't let him shame you. You are normal.

[SmokyChica]

Not to sound rude to you two who have responded, I'd just like to clarify. I fully respect and support his decision to remain abstinent until marriage. It's just difficult when I've had sex and I physically want it, but I want a way to work past that because he is a great guy and I think this relationship can really work out. I don't want to end it

[Babs]

Not to sound rude to you two who have responded, I'd just like to clarify. I fully respect and support his decision to remain abstinent until marriage. It's just difficult when I've had sex and I physically want it, but I want a way to work past that because he is a great guy and I think this relationship can really work out. I don't want to end it

I didn't mean to imply that you should end it. If you can move past it and have a happy relationship with him, then by all means do it.
There's no special "way" to move past it, you just do. If that makes sense.

[SmokyChica]

Ok thank you. I guess I'll find a way to compromise with it. I appreciate the help

[keshasglitter]

boys r slaves. if they don't do wut the girl wants, they arent worth it

[Bull]

boys r slaves. if they don't do wut the girl wants, they arent worth it

Wow, what a concept. Not appealing to me in the least. So I guess, by your criteria I am worthless. I am a slave to no one!

[bruzer]

Sex and is a special thing that you should all accept and enjoy and not forced just ask and give him time it will b better

[Daniella98]

I would respect his decision not to have sex and end the relationship. Sex is fine and perfectly healthy, and don't let him shame you for wanting it. But you clearly don't agree with his religion, so I would end it. Just be friends and be happy with that. If he wants you to respect his beliefs he should respect yours. Again, don't let him shame you. You are normal.

Yes this. I agree

[Uniquemind]

Masturbation and sex toys might help you take the edge off, but really that's all that's available to you at the moment.

I've seen these situations before, in most of them the girl ends up losing the passion for the guy, while simultaneously still thinking of him as a great guy, and the relationship falls apart, each going their separate ways.

The other path I've seen these relationships take is that couples get married young. (I.e. These would be my Mormon friends)

[Zachary G]

If you are sexually frustrated then you should find something to do that will appease yourself -- masturbation, sex toys, etc -- but as far as his convictions go, you have to respect where he is coming from and what he is trying to do for himself. If you cant find any respect for his beliefs then maybe he isnt the one for you.

[AutumnWinds]

My boyfriend and I have differences on sex. He's a virgin and I'm not, and he wants to save himself for marriage, but we started doing some things. We talked about sex earlier and I said I do in face want it, and he does too, but it led to a whole discussion that ended with him not truly wanting to have sex with me... I know I shouldn't take it offensively, I think it's just because of his religious beliefs, and I want to respect that but at the same time it hurts. I have a bad time dealing with rejection, and I don't know what to do with myself now that he said we should stop doing anything sexual. Any advice?

i'd think a lo on if you can accept a relationship without sex. there's nothing wrong with him not wanting to have sex until marriage, but there is also nothing wrong with you deciding you can't be in a relationship unless sex is a part of it. but if you do decide to be with him, it's not right to pressure him to do something he has said he doesn't want to.

[SmokyChica]

Thank you for everyone who gave me advice. I talk to my boyfriend we agreed if we weren't 100% sure we wanted this and had doubts, it isn't the right time. We are still together but decided to put off the idea of sex before he thinks it's right. Thank you all for the help. Also, boys are not slaves. Boys are humans just as girls are, and everyone should be respected. Just wanted to put that out there