Here's why i am doomed.

[DamWayne]

I am a guy.
I am short, i am fat. I have red curly hair. I am very hairy (talking back hair joining chest hair with shoulder hair hairy). I am ugly (big nose, round face, pimples, glasses) i have tons of freckles. Im not in anyway muscular or atlethic. I am bulimic, i am depressed.

I am extremely shy, i am very bad at school, i dont have any brilliant big money making job ahead of me. I have a small penis, i have never even kissed a girl.

I am not funny, i am not smart, i am not passionate. I am not a musician, not a n artist in any way shape or form. I am a nerd, i am a gamer. I think of electronic junk and video game all day long. I can't do a single push-up, pull-up or sit-up.

Now, please, ladies, and guys for that matters, i want you to be completely honest, dont try to be nice, don't try to be a saviour or to make me feel good.
What would you do, if you knew me... if you saw me... Would you think i'm attractive? Would you think you want to have sex with me? Would you want to hang out with me? Would you think of me when you're about to fall asleep?

Of course not. Nobody would. Who would ever lay their eyes on a fat ugly short red hair guy. No girl in their right mind.
I know what i should be. I should be tall, taller than them, i should be blond or black or brown hair, i should be ripped, i should have abs, i should have a hot face...
I should be good at school or athletic, or play guitar or piano, or draw amazingly well...
I should be experienced in sex, having a big penis... i should make them dream, laugh, see the passion in my eyes... Thats what i should be to be able to have one day a girlfriend...

But i wont, and i know i wont, and you know it too. The nasty portrait of this ugly fat red hair guy you imagined in your head, its much much worse than the reality.

[hockeyboi99]

Every girl, and guy for that matter, have their own preferences and definitions of what good looking is. I understand how it feels to have low self-esteem, and be extremely unhappy with your appearance. Mind you, however, that does not mean everyone else you will come to meet will have that same outlook on you. Being shy does not make it any easier. But as I said before, everyone has their own perception on what it is to be attractive.

You also do not have to have a certain color hair, or athletic build to be deemed attractive either. I am certainly not athletic, and am actually quite scrawny and shy, yet I have met someone who (for whatever reason) finds me good looking. I know it is a bothersome situation to be in, but you can't spend your life wishing to look a certain way. When you set such expectations for yourself it usually just ends up in disappointment. And, even if you did achieve such goals, would you truly be satisfied?

It is always best to embrace yourself for who you are, and feel pride for being that. You are you! And that is a very special thing, even if it seems insignificant. I am not trying to cheer you up, or be a savior. I am simply telling you things I've learned from my own personal experiences.

But also allow me to tell you that sexual experiences are not everything. Sex is not of any vital importance. It is just a tool used for pleasure, and reproduction. Sex is just sex basically, and you'll grow more experienced with it in time.

Your area of interests are fine as well! I'm quite fond of video games myself. Nothing wrong with that. Intelligence isn't simply defined by how well you preform in school. Intelligence is vast, and caters to so many different areas. Do not let bad grade marks give you the impression that you don't have a sense of intelligence.

[DamWayne]

you are scrawny= skinny, skinny=possible visible abs. you're doing thusands time better than me.
i talk about hair color because virutally every girl in the world finds red hair guys gross. Not just back hair gross but "i would never approach this freak gross"

and nobody finds fat attractive, nobody finds pimples or bodyhair attractive.

i know what people will tell me, "go eat a salad and run, you fat pig!! why dont you shave your hair and dye the redness?"

but i cant, its above my strengh, i cant lose weight, im bulimic, and i deserve to be alone and hated, because im fat, so i shouldnt even complain here.

[Primenumber]

you are scrawny= skinny, skinny=possible visible abs. you're doing thusands time better than me.
i talk about hair color because virutally every girl in the world finds red hair guys gross. Not just back hair gross but "i would never approach this freak gross"

and nobody finds fat attractive, nobody finds pimples or bodyhair attractive.

i know what people will tell me, "go eat a salad and run, you fat pig!! why dont you shave your hair and dye the redness?"

but i cant, its above my strengh, i cant lose weight, im bulimic, and i deserve to be alone and hated, because im fat, so i shouldnt even complain here.

Hey I love red hair! Both on girls and guys, red hair is awesome. Also, you should not care about what girls find attractive, change, but only for yourself.

Losing weight does not have to be that hard. I lost some weight recently, simply by eating a little less and more regularly and doing SOME exercise like situps and swimming etc. It took some time to see the results, but once you get into routine, it barely bothers you. i acctually enjoyed the "clean feeling" it lgave me, eating healthy and exercising.

Anyways, physical attractiveness is only the less important part of who you are. If i met you, looking just as you described yourself, and liked your personality, i would definetly not dismiss you because of your looks.

[Kirina]

Pushups is lifting your own body weight. You can't think "Oh I can't do pushups, so I'm weak". You are heavy, even those that do exercise probably can't lift you.

Those that exercise for the first time It's recommended starting out with like 20kg. Before you do pushups, you need to get lighter or stronger.

If you eat better, you will lose weight.
Stop with soda, snacks, junkfood. Like eat some chocolate on saturday to keep the spirit up, but that's it.

Take a walk everyday. Even if you can't walk for more than a minute (you can tho). Like take a walk everyday and if you just walk for 5minutes, a week later and you be able to walk 10minutes.
Keep that up and maybe 1 month in and you can walk for an hour, then you may start jogging and you won't be able to do it for long in the beginning, but just like anything in life. You will improve.

You play videogames right, so you know that new games are difficult, at least hentes your unfamiliar to.
But after playing them for a week, learning the basics and the games become easy/fun. That's how it is with exercise, that's how it is with everything in life.

Don't think about all your other issues, focus on exercise first. Not only will your body get slimmer, your face will as well.

[DamWayne]

thanks for the answers, but how can i stop eating with my bulimia... i usually dont eat at meals or just salad but i get uncontrollable cravings at night or between meals... and its not the purging type of bulimia, i keep everything inside.
even if i lose 60 pounds i still wouldnt have 6 pack abs... and i would have a flabby skinny torso, weak arms with flabby exta skin... i cant be "hot" even if i lost almost another person's weight in fat...

[Typhlosion]

thanks for the answers, but how can i stop eating with my bulimia... i usually dont eat at meals or just salad but i get uncontrollable cravings at night or between meals... and its not the purging type of bulimia, i keep everything inside.
even if i lose 60 pounds i still wouldnt have 6 pack abs... and i would have a flabby skinny torso, weak arms with flabby exta skin... i cant be "hot" even if i lost almost another person's weight in fat...

I can't say anything about bulimia, but I can say that losing weight shows some degree of dedication, and dedication is sexy. Extra skin is so much more impressive than an overweight body, and, if I may say so myself, I find it kinda cute myself.

You're not doomed mate :j

[hockeyboi99]

you are scrawny= skinny, skinny=possible visible abs. you're doing thusands time better than me.
i talk about hair color because virutally every girl in the world finds red hair guys gross. Not just back hair gross but "i would never approach this freak gross"

and nobody finds fat attractive, nobody finds pimples or bodyhair attractive.

i know what people will tell me, "go eat a salad and run, you fat pig!! why dont you shave your hair and dye the redness?"

but i cant, its above my strengh, i cant lose weight, im bulimic, and i deserve to be alone and hated, because im fat, so i shouldnt even complain here.

Abs are all based on muscle which I lack. Nonetheless, like I said before, it's all based on preference. I have met a few females who have dated males with red hair, so clearly there are some people in the world who are attracted to it.

Body hair can easily be mended by either shaving, or using hair removal cream. And pimples can be removed as well if you find an acne treatment that works well with you.

Does it ever do us any good to dwell so obsessively over our weight? These things do not truly matter unless they are harming your health drastically. It's easier said than done, but learning to accept yourself for who you are all give you peace of mind.

I do suggest you consider seeing a doctor, or possibly a therapist/psychologist. They could advise you on what to do to make yourself feel better, and work towards solving this issue with you.

[DamWayne]

yeah 'some' people, 10 out of 10 millions and its probably seen as a nastyfetish...

and no, abs are about bodyfat, low bodyfat make abs appear, wether you have a lot of muscles or not, thats were peopel are confused about skinny people being ripped... you need to go at like 7% bodyfat to have visible abs, no matter how muscular you are. (i am about like 42% bodyfat... dont know how much pounds i should lose)

[DamWayne]

fat hate is going strong... nobody likes fat guys... id better kill myself rather than be fat in this world where nobody would date a fat disgusting pig like me

[Hyper]

Why are you putting yourself down so much?

I mean even if I believe you - that you are fat, ugly, big nosed, short, small penised whatever...

You need to realise that the world is a pretty big place filled with different people.. To me it seems this self hatred, putting yourself down, is all related to your belief that you are so horrible and disgusting that no one could possibly sincerely like you.

Well I've felt pretty similar - to be fair I'm not short or red haired but I do still have pimples at 22 and am balding so I do hope that gives some credibility to what I am about to say - but I've seen for myself that there are all kinds of people with all kinds of likes and dislikes.

I wont lie to you. if everything you said about yourself is objectively true then yes you will have a much harder time at making relationship but at the same time I also believe from the way you write that you overexeggarete (holy shit is that word typed right?).

But there's still all types out there both female and male - being not perfect as described by cult like idols is not the end of the world - but despiseing yourself for your own appearance is close to it.

I wish I could formulate some awesome inspiring paragraph here but the truth here is that the more you put yourself down the lower you sink. Sadly rising up isn't as simple as ''just believing'' either but the harshest reality is that if you don't believe in yourself then you aren't worth anything as a man to almost any woman on the planet.

On a side note based on what you described I wouldn't mind nerding out with you over games and stuff - the axioms that form ''value'' in the eyes of people are vastly different so don't forget that please, who we want to interact with and who we think are worth ineracting with are based on these vastly differing individual values.

[DamWayne]

I am putting myself down because everyone else's does too.. even if i wasnt ugly and had pimples, i would be called fat, even if i wasnt fat, i would be called short, even if i wasnt short i would be called "ginger" (because red hair on guys is a flaw for some reason) and when ill be intimate with a girl even without any of these problems she would be turned off by my small dick...

I want to love my body, i know that you cant do good to your body if you dont love it (and thats why fat shaming to make fat people lose weight is stupid) but when every single features i have is seen as bad for many and various people... its pretty hard to love your body, the excuse of "wear it as a shield" is hard when everything about you is bad. Even my fingers are ugly with large and flat nails, and i have boring brown eyes.