Going to the gynecologist?

[lilrese]

I am 17 years old and my mom has made me an appointment to go see the gynecologist next week.
I am very nerves because my mom dose not I am having sex. I also dont want to tell the doctor I am having sex because I am scared. What should I do? What would happen if I go the the gynecologist? What was your experience like? Was it bad? Would I have yo get an exam? Should I be nervous?

[ClaraWho]

Hi Charese and welcome to the forum.

I'm not sure how it works in the States, but in the UK all conversation is kept confidential (patient-doctor confidentiality), unless you are believed to be at risk (suicidal intent). This would mean all talk about your sex life is never shared with parents/guardians.

I WOULD tell them you are sexually active. These check-ups are carried out by qualified medical professionals who use both the information you provide them and examination, to ensure you are healthy and safe. They aren't there to judge your life choices or inform your parents on you. So tell them, yes it's all going to be horribly uncomfortable, but they do this 1000's of times a year.

Nobody ever died of discomfort!

Good Luck

~ Clara

[SkyClad33605]

Never ever withhold anything from your doctor. The doctor's office is a safe place. For her or him to give you the best care they need to know everything.

The first time I went to my obgny I told her that I was sexually active and for her to please not tell my mom. My doctor assured me that everything was confidential.

You are the doctor's patient not your parents.

I was crazy nervous the first time too. But honestly it's not much different than any other doctors visit. There is no shame. :)

[ObliviousCat]

The gynecologist nor your regular physician will not tell your parents that you are sexually active without your permission - they don't have the right to, at least in the state in which I reside. It has to remain confidential unless otherwise stated by you.

I'm currently 15 and had my first visit to the gyn a few months back. At the clinic I went to, there was a nurse who called me in and she asked me a few general questions. She asked me how long I've been sexually active, if my then partner and I were both monogamous, if I do any drugs or drink alcohol, etc. It's important that you answer honestly. After that she sent me back out to the waiting room and a few minutes later I was called back in and was sent into a room. The nurse pulled this curtain over the door and closed it behind her and I was ordered to strip down (after she left, of course). I removed all clothing and put on this gown and lied down on the patient examination bed thing and waited for my gyn. She came in and she was a nice old lady. We didn't really talk - she just examined my breasts and privates and told me everything was okay! My mom told me that the tube or whatever thing they use and put inside you would hurt but it didn't hurt me at all...it just felt a bit uncomfortable. After that she ordered some lab tests - a urine and blood test (blood test was for HIV). They never called to tell me the results and I was worried at first until my mom reassured me that they will not call you unless the results are positive. So, if they don't call you, you're good! You don't have anything. :D Hope this helps!

[sonnenstrahl]

it is determined the doctor whether you have sex or not. as it is bound by its confidentiality and your parents will not find out about it

[clairey]

I went recently for the first time too. I was so nervous before but it honest wasn't as bad as I expected. The doctor was really nice and gentle and very quick. We didn't have much to talk about but she did say anything we discussed would be confidential.

[lacey02]

hope you had a nice doc and that all went well

[Elysium]

hope you had a nice doc and that all went well
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