I do not know what to do anymore

[Lilly1122]

Hi!
My name is Lily and I am 17 years old (I am not native english speaker but I hope you will understand me). I am really different. I love my friends but not as much as I did when I was younger. They do not make me really happy. I really like talk with them, listen their problem, gossip... But that is not enough anymore. My friends want me to go out with them and having fun and drinking. But I hate it. I am maybe boring but I like to be good girl. I enjoy obey rules, wearing nice clothes (nothing really dark or controversal)... I am not a rebel. My parents are quite strict, especially my father, but I still love them and I do not want make them worry or sad. This summer I spend as a nanny. I look after kids everyday (our friend pay me to look after her daughter who is seven years old, but I also take care for her cousin and my brother and our neighbour (they are all boys at age 14). At first boys said that they can take care of themselves, while our parents are at work, but then they change their mind. I cooked lunch everyday and played with them. First week they wanted to stay in living room, play our xbox and watching movies. But then a girl said that this is boring and we become talk a lot, playing games like cluedo, memory or monopoli and playing oudside (games with ball, hide and seek, hunt...) in ourbig gardern and boys quickley join us. We do it all the summer and it really was the summer of my life. I lose some weight (because I run with them everyday and eat less), I come home everyday dirty and messy and really tired but happy, plus I earned some money and it was pretty cool too. We live on a countryside and our neighbour (the one who played with us), has a small farm. His brother (he is 19 and I fell in love with him a little bit, but it is other story) every week teach us how to ride a horse and bake a corn and we helped him feed cows and pigs and pick up fruit and vegetables...That was the life I could live forever. With children, on a farm, without all worries and problems (I know it is not that simple, but still I have so much fun). I was afraid that I will not have time for writing anymore (I write my novel), but girl loved my stories and I told her everyday one and even boys listened and they have funny comments all the time and it was great. But the summer ends now. We all have to go back in school in thuesday and I will miss them so much. I am also very sad because I know I will not see my 19 years old neighbour anymore (he is going to college and he was the best guy I have meet.).
When I was not take care of this children I was seeing my friends from school. And this friends invited me to a party tonight. It is a concert in a city and they want me to come with them. I do not really wanna go because I know they will be all drunk and they will smoke. I never do it. Like I said-I am a good girl. My best friend asked me and our other friend to sleep at her place and I do not that either, because I know they are going to be waisted and they will want me to drink too and they will tell me to drink and tell me that I can not relax and that I am boring. Today I am aslo feeling pretty sick-I have a terrible headache and my ears are hurting. But if I do not go, all are going to say that I was afraid to go and that I have no social life...I have not see my family for a while (my parents worked a lot) and today we can be togehter again, talking and watching our favourite TV show. I kind of want that.
I feel like there is something wrong with me. Is it normal that you prefer playing with children and spending time with your family than drinking and having "fun" with your friends? Will you go to the party or stay at home if you were me?

[wolf g]

Hi!
My name is Lily and I am 17 years old (I am not native english speaker but I hope you will understand me). I am really different. I love my friends but not as much as I did when I was younger. They do not make me really happy. I really like talk with them, listen their problem, gossip... But that is not enough anymore. My friends want me to go out with them and having fun and drinking. But I hate it. I am maybe boring but I like to be good girl. I enjoy obey rules, wearing nice clothes (nothing really dark or controversal)... I am not a rebel. My parents are quite strict, especially my father, but I still love them and I do not want make them worry or sad. This summer I spend as a nanny. I look after kids everyday (our friend pay me to look after her daughter who is seven years old, but I also take care for her cousin and my brother and our neighbour (they are all boys at age 14). At first boys said that they can take care of themselves, while our parents are at work, but then they change their mind. I cooked lunch everyday and played with them. First week they wanted to stay in living room, play our xbox and watching movies. But then a girl said that this is boring and we become talk a lot, playing games like cluedo, memory or monopoli and playing oudside (games with ball, hide and seek, hunt...) in ourbig gardern and boys quickley join us. We do it all the summer and it really was the summer of my life. I lose some weight (because I run with them everyday and eat less), I come home everyday dirty and messy and really tired but happy, plus I earned some money and it was pretty cool too. We live on a countryside and our neighbour (the one who played with us), has a small farm. His brother (he is 19 and I fell in love with him a little bit, but it is other story) every week teach us how to ride a horse and bake a corn and we helped him feed cows and pigs and pick up fruit and vegetables...That was the life I could live forever. With children, on a farm, without all worries and problems (I know it is not that simple, but still I have so much fun). I was afraid that I will not have time for writing anymore (I write my novel), but girl loved my stories and I told her everyday one and even boys listened and they have funny comments all the time and it was great. But the summer ends now. We all have to go back in school in thuesday and I will miss them so much. I am also very sad because I know I will not see my 19 years old neighbour anymore (he is going to college and he was the best guy I have meet.).
When I was not take care of this children I was seeing my friends from school. And this friends invited me to a party tonight. It is a concert in a city and they want me to come with them. I do not really wanna go because I know they will be all drunk and they will smoke. I never do it. Like I said-I am a good girl. My best friend asked me and our other friend to sleep at her place and I do not that either, because I know they are going to be waisted and they will want me to drink too and they will tell me to drink and tell me that I can not relax and that I am boring. Today I am aslo feeling pretty sick-I have a terrible headache and my ears are hurting. But if I do not go, all are going to say that I was afraid to go and that I have no social life...I have not see my family for a while (my parents worked a lot) and today we can be togehter again, talking and watching our favourite TV show. I kind of want that.
I feel like there is something wrong with me. Is it normal that you prefer playing with children and spending time with your family than drinking and having "fun" with your friends? Will you go to the party or stay at home if you were me?
you know you are good girl really the girls think that i am borring like you but i will tell you something it's not from their busniss if you will take my advice don't and stay with your familly these is the real fun it's beside you parent don't think that if you don't go to partices so you are borring you are amazing girl trust me
if they do things you don't wan it don't go because it's your life not their
stay at with your parents and don't care about them

[Lilly1122]

Thank you so much wolf you help me so much.

[Hudor]

It's your life. Don't give in to pressure by anyone to do anything that you don't want to do. If you like to spend time with your family over friends that's totally normal and there's nothing wrong in it. In the end, it's about you doing what you feel happy doing and therefore I guess if I were you I'd stay at home.

[Lilly1122]

Thank you Hodor...I stayed at home and had amzing night
But still...is that normal that I prefer family and small children than my friends?

[StoppingTom]

People are different. What you like and have fun with doesn't have to be the same as what your friends enjoy, and it's not odd to have fun doing what you do. It's all a matter of personality, like I wouldn't probably go to parties either, I prefer staying home. Do what you like to do, and don't worry about what other people think if it makes you happy.

[Uniquemind]

It's totally normal.

I've had those moments where in my gut, instincts are telling me not to hang out with friends or when they do certain activities.

I was in a similar situation once, and I bailed. I stayed home to study for a biology test.

Well my stupid friends decided it was smart to go drive around town drunk. They're a mixed gender group of friends, and well the two guys thought it was halarious to attempt shop lifting....they were caught and spent the night in jail.

Lucky I wasn't with them and stayed home.


Never feel peer pressured into anything, live your life by these rules:


You do what you do because YOU wanna do that as long as you're using common sense to stay safe. Reputation be damned, and so-called "friends" be damned.

Exception: sometimes you'll need to take jobs you don't like because you need money. But once you have enough money, go back to the main rule.

[ClaraWho]

Next time you post, maybe do a first draft haha. That was long to read and a lot of it was irrelevant, which puts a lot of people off reading to the end.

If you don't enjoy partying or drinking, why would you do it? It doesn't sound like you have anything in common with these so-called 'friends', and that they are all rather generic.

The issue in this world, is that boring, stupid people make up the majority. They live for cheap, reckless, quick thrills that sacrifice long-term happiness. If anyone is pressuring you by making nasty comments to do something you have clearly said no to, they aren't worth your time.

Personally I've never drank in my life, never will. I've never been to a party. I'm popular but I only hang out with a close group of friends.

I see nothing wrong with enjoying still ' being a kid' as it were, and why do you let it bother you? Is it important to you that these people are seen to be hanging out with you?

In terms of the guy you fancy, if you think he feels the same way, speak to him! He can't mind read and you only live once.

I cannot tell you what I'd do if I were you, because you are entirely your own person. You know what you enjoy, what makes you happy, and I see no reason why you shouldn't simply pursue those activities.

~ Clara