Gender Roles?¿?¿

[Canadian.Teen]

Okay so I am non bianary but I use male pronouns. I have been experimenting with makeup for about 4 months now but I have been doing it at night or when I am home alone so my mom doesn't find out. Now I am tired of hiding and I want to be able to wear makeup in public. What should I tell or say to my mom for her to understand that it is okay for "guys" to wear makeup. (I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense lol)

[northy]

Does she know that you don't identify as male? This would be the first thing to tell her. Depending on how she reacts, either tell her about the make up at the same time or wait for her to accept it.

[Desuetude]

Damn that's a difficult one. Society has been conforming the gender binary for so long that people in the generations above us often tend to be closed minded about venturing outside of it.

Rather than explain why it's okay for 'boys' to wear makeup, try and come up with other things that don't conform to the binary to try and make her understand better? For example girls having short hair, its a lot more common now for cis girls to have short hair cuts than it was 10/20 years ago and vice versa with boys and long hair.

Also maybe you can use the idea of rock stars wearing makeup, a lot of them tend to wear eye liner and nail polish and people don't really bat an eye anymore. If she starts to argue that you shouldnt wear it, ask her 'why?'. Her argument will fall right through, just counter it with your feelings and opinions and let her know that the gender binary is falling though, its not so strict anymore. Femininity being related to girls and masculinity, boys, isn't the case so much.

Do you feel comfortable coming out as non-binary? If you try to explain it to her she might be more accepting? Then again if you start wearing makeup and changing your gender expression when/if you do come out it might not seem like such a big thing. I really don't know which one would be better, sorry >.<

All I'd say is that gender non-conforming is quite a recent thing that's come into the spotlight so she might not understand at first. Be patient and give her time, try to let her know that this is important to you and that you want her support.

[DoodleSnap]

Damn that's a difficult one. Society has been conforming the gender binary for so long that people in the generations above us often tend to be closed minded about venturing outside of it.

Rather than explain why it's okay for 'boys' to wear makeup, try and come up with other things that don't conform to the binary to try and make her understand better? For example girls having short hair, its a lot more common now for cis girls to have short hair cuts than it was 10/20 years ago and vice versa with boys and long hair.

Also maybe you can use the idea of rock stars wearing makeup, a lot of them tend to wear eye liner and nail polish and people don't really bat an eye anymore. If she starts to argue that you shouldnt wear it, ask her 'why?'. Her argument will fall right through, just counter it with your feelings and opinions and let her know that the gender binary is falling though, its not so strict anymore. Femininity being related to girls and masculinity, boys, isn't the case so much.

Do you feel comfortable coming out as non-binary? If you try to explain it to her she might be more accepting? Then again if you start wearing makeup and changing your gender expression when/if you do come out it might not seem like such a big thing. I really don't know which one would be better, sorry >.<

All I'd say is that gender non-conforming is quite a recent thing that's come into the spotlight so she might not understand at first. Be patient and give her time, try to let her know that this is important to you and that you want her support.
^This.

Also, if it is any consolation, in a recent YouGov poll in the UK, nearly half of 18-24 year olds described their sexual orientation as neither 100% gay or straight. More people are being fluid these days, with their gender, and their sexuality. A lot of people are with you on this one, a lot of people love and support you for who you are.

[Porpoise101]

Well this is advice for anything in life, but just don't rush into things. Don't shock your mom, just start small and work your way up to being who you are.