How do you love again?

[miguelc]

I recently got out of a 4 year relationship, not only was it long-term, it was my first. When I say that this girl was my first everything, I mean everything: hug, holding hands, kiss, sex, living together, etc. We started dating my sophomore year in high school when we were 15. Now, it's 4 years later we are about to go into our sophomore year in college and we lived out our entire adolescent lives together. We saw and did so many things together. She is literally everything I know when it comes to relationships. How do you get over that?

I can't even begin to look or speak to another woman without thinking about her. I mean, I was at a bar with my friends trying to cheer me up and every time I spoke to an admittedly attractive girl all I could see was Biz (my ex-girlfriend) and think how this girl was not her.

I know that I need to let go of her and I'm trying but it's not easy. I know that while I hold on I can't even begin to try and open myself up to another. Because I won't even be giving anyone else a chance. So I guess my question isn't "How do you love again," it's "How do you move on?"

[Eperty123]

It takes time getting over someone you really love. A good thing for you to do is to stop all communications with her. Delete her number, unfriend her on Facebook etc. It's hard at first but as time passes by you'll get your thoughts straighten out and you'll move on eventually. Just take your time. :)

[DoodleSnap]

Damn, this sucks. It's difficult to go through something like this.

Only time can heal this wound. I wouldn't recommend what is above me, as denying her existence is just pushing the issue under the rug. You have to accept, and get over this.
Try not to focus so much on seeking another relationship right now, focus less on girls, and just work on getting through life with a smile on your face, bit by bit. It won't be easy, but I know you can do it.

Good luck.