Guy friend asking (begging/ pleading) for a bj

[lisa S]

So the other night I'm hanging out with this guy I'm friends with. We're on the same page--friends, that's it. We've fooled around before but it was just that, random fooling around. Whatever, no biggie. Anyways, he starts saying how horny he is and he can really use a bj. I was kinda taken aback by how he just flat out asked....it's not like we were fooling around and he wanted more.

Just curious guys, does that actually work? Do you think girls are easier cause you've hooked up with them before? Ladies, does it bother you when guys flat-out ask for a bj? Do you comply?

[Meganium]

Oh, fuck that. No way in hell would I ever be that...is rude the word? I don't even know.

Not only because I think it wouldn't work, but because its just...wrong to me for things to be casual and sudden like that.

[Broken Toy]

I would say, if i was a girl, no because thats a shit tactic. Like he could try and work it up but he didnt even try. Tell him to fuck off

[Abhorrence]

I don't think anyone should just expect something like that from anybody. That was a stupid thing he did, though I guess it is better than him forcing himself on you. Still a bit of a penis in my opinion, though.

[Emerald Dream]

That's completely ridiculous - just because you fooled around with someone in the past, that doesn't mean they have a standing invitation. People have sex for different reasons - for physical satisfaction, an expression of love, etc...It's a good bet that any two people have different views on sexual expectations.

Besides, real life (and real sex) isn't straight out of a porn scene. Causally being asked for a bj (or sex in general) is really awkward and embarrassing, especially when you don't even have a relationship with that person - at least in my eyes.

[Uniquemind]

No I could not comply.

But I'd have an internal laugh, and slight nod that at least their being honest and not playing any games.

I'd only comply if I secretly wanted more than just a friendship.

[Riley2015]

You should only do it if you want to do it.

If you don't want to than don't do it, you're not here to be his sexual servant

One of my girl mates gave me a bj a while ago, but she was the one who asked me not the other way around! No boy would refuse if its on offer, but i'd never try and make a girl give me one. It's her choice if she wants to

:)

[Babs]

If someone tried that shit, I would probably laugh. That shit's just... Jesus Christ. People can do better than that.
Pro tip: begging for a bj is fucking weird, whether you've fooled around or not.

[MeliWelli]

No way. Your friend needs to lean some manners. Hope you told him to fuck off. Not sure if he has ever done anything with you before, but sounds like he is totally clueless about sex and girls. Might forgive him if he was drunk, otherwise you should probably ditch him.

[Iam-Marie]

this guy would be no longer a friend of mine

[Let Me Be a Pony]

Genius idea, yes.
If that guy was in prison, I bet everyone would be craving for a bj from him.

[Broken Toy]

It really shows the cultural divide of my home to everyone elses. Everyone thinksnits bad he is like expecting to get a bj and i have an issue he hasnt got a good tactic.

Cmon guys, id do anything for my mates if they were proper grafting for it like, if they try hard like hehe

[ClaraWho]

So the other night I'm hanging out with this guy I'm friends with. We're on the same page--friends, that's it. We've fooled around before but it was just that, random fooling around. Whatever, no biggie. Anyways, he starts saying how horny he is and he can really use a bj. I was kinda taken aback by how he just flat out asked....it's not like we were fooling around and he wanted more.

Just curious guys, does that actually work? Do you think girls are easier cause you've hooked up with them before? Ladies, does it bother you when guys flat-out ask for a bj? Do you comply?

Never would be in that position, but it would kinda spook me. He may find himself clutching his privates on the floor.

Fact a lot of people are missing here is your past. You have shown you're casual about sex and he probably doesn't think you care who/what/when you do so long as you get some action. You were horny before, now he is horny. You made sex between you a mechanical, routine process for alleviating arousal. So he was horny and asked for sex. Isn't that how friends with benefits work at the most basic descriptive level?

Sure, you may not appreciate his bluntness and are always entitled to refuse, but that's the relationship you have created. Either ditch him and learn from the experience, or talk through your new relationship going forward with him.

~ Clara

[shamrockgirl02]

I've had one guy friend just flat out ask me to blow him, and he was the boy I lost my virginity to months before. I did it because of our history and he asked me privately, but if I had a guy ask me in front of a bunch of people, I'd be pissed because it's like he's letting everybody know that he just sees me as a cum depository. But if I was in your situation I might do it, although the "begging" aspect is a bit of a turn off.

[NorthSeaGirl]

He could ask for a lot of things - but he asks for a blow job. Better give that egoist an arse kick.

[mikielikesit]

I don't really see the harm in him asking, as long as he can accept the answer if its a "hell no". It appears he feels comfortable with you and would you just prefer he not say anything, at least you know how he feels

[THJKIGB]

I would have walked out. The only guy who asked me to give him a BJ on random occasions in my boyfriend of a year and a half. Most of the time I will give him one.

[StoppingTom]

That's pretty poor form. If a friend of mine did that to a girl I'd probably smack him for being so dense.

[ashdyn]

Since y'all fooled around before he was probably like "ehhhh I'll just give it a shot...what's the worst that could happen" lol all the haters posting on here lbr if it worked y'all would be calling that dude a genius ��

[ClaireM]

It sounds a bit weird, but I don't have anything against friends with benefits as long as that is what both people want and understand about their relationship.
Some jerks at my school often ask girls for random sex acts because they are playing up to their mates, they usually get a swift put down, but it can be a bit scary if you are on your own.

[DoodleSnap]

There is nothing wrong with a friends with benefits relationship, but the boundaries need to be clear, and it requires a lot of communication. If you're uncomfortable with something that he said, you need to speak about it, so that you both understand what you are to each other.

[Jordan99]

We've fooled around before but it was just that, random fooling around. Whatever, no biggie.

So, you've fooled around with him before and it was, "no biggie" and now you are offended he brings up fooling around again with you. Hmm, interesting. I suppose he should be a mind reader and just be available when it is "no biggie" to YOU.

Now, if he truly is "begging" you for some action, that's very unattractive and kind of a turn-off, but if he's just telling you he'd like to have one and is being a little insistent that's not a big deal and you could just tell him "NO" and then tell him you hope it doesn't hurt your friendship.

[Cronor]

Jordan made a great point.
Someone here called him an egoist; What?!

Read again, he was 'begging' for it. He didn't say "Ur gunn suk sum dik"....

I see it this way; Your friend is sexually frustrated, he knows that you didn't mind messing around with him, so he turns to you, asking for a blowie.

I don't know how the phuck would he know it bothers you if you considered your messing around a 'no biggie'.

[AutumnWinds]

So the other night I'm hanging out with this guy I'm friends with. We're on the same page--friends, that's it. We've fooled around before but it was just that, random fooling around. Whatever, no biggie. Anyways, he starts saying how horny he is and he can really use a bj. I was kinda taken aback by how he just flat out asked....it's not like we were fooling around and he wanted more.

Just curious guys, does that actually work? Do you think girls are easier cause you've hooked up with them before? Ladies, does it bother you when guys flat-out ask for a bj? Do you comply?

i kinda respect him for it. i mean he knows there was a president and he didn't beat around the bush about it. i think that's cool. i mean how else would you ask your friend for one.

that being said i hope he was cool with it when you said no. if he pushed you or tried to make you feel guilty that's a scummy thing to do.

[itschilled]

He's just trying a tactic on you to get something out, id suggest don't do it. hes just trying to pull a fast one.

[Hannah98]

So, you've fooled around with him before and it was, "no biggie" and now you are offended he brings up fooling around again with you. Hmm, interesting. I suppose he should be a mind reader and just be available when it is "no biggie" to YOU.

Now, if he truly is "begging" you for some action, that's very unattractive and kind of a turn-off, but if he's just telling you he'd like to have one and is being a little insistent that's not a big deal and you could just tell him "NO" and then tell him you hope it doesn't hurt your friendship.

Not very cool to beg for it but I kinda' agree with Jordan---by the way, she is my BFF--but even still, if she weren't I still think she makes a valid point. Try to explain to him that that was then and this is now and you don't see him "that way" and you hope you can still be friends. If he accepts that, you still have his friendship. If he cannot get past it, you may have to end the friendship. And, I'll probably get beat up for this, but I think it is so difficult and it may even be impossible for boys and girls to simply be friends...I think that sex will always get in the way or at least be a simmering thought in the background.