Is it safe to talk to my counselor about this?

[Michael Davis]

So, over week ago I had sex for the first time, giving a boy who was less than a year older than me a blowjob and letting him give me one but other than on this thread I haven't told anyone about it. If I were to tell my counselor, would he be legally required to tell someone or would it remain confidential? I saw him yesterday but I was afraid to bring it up in case he was required to tell someone. Does anyone know whether or not it would be safe to tell him?

Edit: Both of us are only 15 years old and the age of consent is 18 years old.
Also because it seems some people do not know what a counselor is I got the definition from Google
coun·se·lor
noun
1. a person trained to give guidance on personal, social, or psychological problems.

[cutboy]

donot tell anybody.why tell??

[Sam-9876]

So, over week ago I had sex for the first time, giving a boy who was less than a year older than me a blowjob and letting him give me one but other than on this thread I haven't told anyone about it. If I were to tell my counselor, would he be legally required to tell someone or would it remain confidential? I saw him yesterday but I was afraid to bring it up in case he was required to tell someone. Does anyone know whether or not it would be safe to tell him?

What's a counsellor?

Why do you want to tell anyone?

[AnonTeen-]

Personally I wouldn't tell anyone about it just keep it between you and the other guy.

[ImTrickster]

I would'nt tell anyone up front to a counsellor however i believe they are meant to keep everything confidental unless your in any kind of danger which requires the police to step in, additionally i guess if your legally allowed to participate in intercourse he wouldnt tell any one due to client confidentialty. But i still wouldnt tell him !!!

[Michael Davis]

I am sure the guy would not mind but he lives over six hours away from me so it's not like we have anything to do with each other so I don't see any point in "keeping it between us" and I never asked whether or not anyone thought I should tell him, I only want to know whether or not he would have to tell someone because we were both underage.

[Faolan]

I know at least where I live if you're under 15 they have to tell your parent, you should check for laws in your state online though

[Hideous]

Are you ashamed of your actions? Do you feel like what you did was wrong?

Based off the information you've provided, you two did not participate in penetrative sexual intercourse but of oral intercourse.

You have done nothing wrong, that is, if both parties agreed to participate.

According to this article, here (http://www.legalmatch.com/law-library/article/statutory-rape-the-age-of-consent.html), in Texas, the age of consent is 17. The minimum age is 14 with an age differential of 3 years; thus, those who are at least 14 years of age can legally have sex with those less than 3 years older.

If this is affecting your mental health, you should talk to your parents. Please quote me if I misunderstood. Thank you.

-

It is safe to talk to your counselor.

[Michael Davis]

I know at least where I live if you're under 15 they have to tell your parent, you should check for laws in your state online though
I've looked but I haven't found anything. I have never been the best at finding things on the internet though.
Do you have any idea where I could find out if that is how it works in Oklahoma?

[AnonTeen-]

I found a site that explains the age of consent in Oklahoma.
http://www.oklahomalegalgroup.com/ageofconsent
Dont exactly know if this is what your looking for. Sorry.

[Michael Davis]

This may be a stupid question but does it matter that I live in Oklahoma, the other guy lives in Texas, and that we had sex in Texas?

[AnonTeen-]

This may be a stupid question but does it matter that I live in Oklahoma, the other guy lives in Texas, and that we had sex in Texas?

Hmm idk. I dont really know a lot about these kinds of things sorry maybe someone else who has posted will know.

[Second Chance]

So, over week ago I had sex for the first time, giving a boy who was less than a year older than me a blowjob and letting him give me one but other than on this thread I haven't told anyone about it. If I were to tell my counselor, would he be legally required to tell someone or would it remain confidential? I saw him yesterday but I was afraid to bring it up in case he was required to tell someone. Does anyone know whether or not it would be safe to tell him?

Edit: Both of us are only 15 years old and the age of consent is 18 years old.
Also because it seems some people do not know what a counselor is I got the definition from Google
coun·se·lor
noun
1. a person trained to give guidance on personal, social, or psychological problems.

In my opinion it should not be a problem for you to tell your counselor about your first time having sex. The only time this would have been a problem is if you were an adult and the person you had sex with was a minor, then that would be reported. In this case this is just two teens having sex which happens. As long as your sex was consensual and not forced, then you should be fine to tell your counselor about having sex.

[nklarke]

I agree with second chance. Most of people have sex before 18 years old.

[BakeBake]

So, over week ago I had sex for the first time, giving a boy who was less than a year older than me a blowjob and letting him give me one but other than on this thread I haven't told anyone about it. If I were to tell my counselor, would he be legally required to tell someone or would it remain confidential? I saw him yesterday but I was afraid to bring it up in case he was required to tell someone. Does anyone know whether or not it would be safe to tell him?

Edit: Both of us are only 15 years old and the age of consent is 18 years old.
Also because it seems some people do not know what a counselor is I got the definition from Google
coun·se·lor
noun
1. a person trained to give guidance on personal, social, or psychological problems.

Listen Bro, this may seem a bit harsh, but I think you are overreacting about the situation. You guys are 15 years old, an age where most boys get curious about the same gender. Sometimes this curiosity brings out actions that are unusual from their daily life (your experience with the other boy).

I think that you should keep this to yourself for your own safety. I think your counselor won't be of much help with the situation you are in. What are you feeling is wrong? What is making you think that you need to talk to your counselor? I think that I will be able to help you get through this difficult time.

[Abhorrence]

I think if you really want to tell your counsellor then I would go ahead and do it. Counsellors are generally extremely confidential, they only pass on information with your consent unless they believe you to be in a lot of danger with severe self-harming or suicidal ideation. With this type of thing they probably won't tell anyone unless the law where you live is a lot different. They've probably heard a million similar things to what you want to say and they probably won't even be phased a slight bit by it. It's their job to help.

[Collinsworthington]

you are legally alowed to have sex with someone the same age as you... the laws are weird if it was a girl you were even 1 second older than it would be considered statuatory rape in some states... our legal system is weird... anyways if its bothering you i would talk about it, they would keep it confidential

[KingdomHearts]

As a trained counsellor myself (No Jokes) I know that anything you tell a counsellor will remain confidential UNLESS it will cause harm to yourself or someone else

[Zachary G]

Dude, I would keep it to myself and not say anything to your counselor about it because he might feel obligated to say something to your parents about it. You never know and I am sure you dont want any drama behind that.

[The Faulted]

Even if the counsellor felt the need to tell his parents, it doesn't mean he/she is allowed to. By law, they have to keep everything private and confidential, unless they are in danger.

You're not in any danger from having sex with this guy. And you know what? If you want to talk to your counsellor about it, go right ahead! They are there to listen to you and you can talk about whatever you want, so even if it's just a burning desire to tell someone, you can trust your counsellor. That's what they are there for.

[Whos_ur_Buddha]

A consular legally has to keep a confidentiality agreement trust me I know. They would be going against a code of ethics that they must follow. The only reason they can break the confidentiality agreement is if your life or another persons life is in danger. I dont know if APA laws are different there but in Colorado that's how they work. oh PS APA is American Psychological Association idk if this helps but I belive consulars must follow APA guidelines on ethics as well

[Snydergate]

I would keep it to yourself

[Yolodolo]

Don't tell, what for?

[Tyson S]

The counselor cannot break confidentiality. Its the law. So by all means tell him

[paletanner]

So, over week ago I had sex for the first time, giving a boy who was less than a year older than me a blowjob and letting him give me one but other than on this thread I haven't told anyone about it. If I were to tell my counselor, would he be legally required to tell someone or would it remain confidential? I saw him yesterday but I was afraid to bring it up in case he was required to tell someone. Does anyone know whether or not it would be safe to tell him?

Edit: Both of us are only 15 years old and the age of consent is 18 years old.
Also because it seems some people do not know what a counselor is I got the definition from Google
coun·se·lor
noun
1. a person trained to give guidance on personal, social, or psychological problems.

i don't think you'll get busted for sex with someone the same age as you. everyone knows teens have sex. i don't think you need to worry. :)

besides, why bother telling anyone unless you're just bragging. but you shouldn't brag. that's kind of douchey.

[SethfromMI]

I think in your case they would have to keep it confidential, so if you really want to go for it. but I could be wrong. I guess go with your gut

[sysrq]

I agree with second chance. Most of people have sex before 18 years old.

Not sure, if majority of 15 year old ones say that they are still virgins then how can magically everyone lose their virginity during those three years until the age of 18. Three years is very short period of time.

[ejpete]

Don't tell your counselor. It will only bring up issues. If you want someone you can trust. Talk to your parents. But your counselor. That's risky and a legal suit could follow.

[Bluebyrd]

Telling someone isn't necessary. Only negatives could come out of it.

[Turtl3]

In my eyes, if you just let it lie then you'll eventually get over it! If you really feel like you need to talk to someone about it then your councilor is probably your best option, it is their job afterall

[fandom_king]

Your counselor isn't allowed to tell anyone anything unless you're planning on harming yourself or someone else. Otherwise, they have to ask your permission to tell other people. Those are the laws here.

[james smith]

In my opinion you should not tell him because you can not guarantee that he will not tell this to your parents

[Colton8]

Why would you want to tell anyone

[thegreatgatz]

I think you have to ask yourself whether its an important issue to your mental health and academic wellness before asking your counselor. In Texas where you are, there might not be much tolerance for being gay.

[Zerg]

I would talk about it with your friend, not the counselor. I would keep it between you two