Pressure to lose my virginity...

[The37thElement]

First off, I apologize if I didn't put this in the correct place. I haven't dated a girl in a few months, but I've been coming across more and more people (in my class) who aren't virgins anymore. This includes one of my ex-girlfriends (this really bugged me). Everyone is indirectly making it seem as though being a virgin is bad. Even though I know this isn't true, I still feel as though I don't fit in because I haven't had sex yet. To make matters worse, it seems like everywhere I go, 13 year olds are already having regular sex. I just don't know what I should feel like.

[Vermilion]

Your 14 there is no rush

[Broken Toy]

First off, I apologize if I didn't put this in the correct place. I haven't dated a girl in a few months, but I've been coming across more and more people (in my class) who aren't virgins anymore. This includes one of my ex-girlfriends (this really bugged me). Everyone is indirectly making it seem as though being a virgin is bad. Even though I know this isn't true, I still feel as though I don't fit in because I haven't had sex yet. To make matters worse, it seems like everywhere I go, 13 year olds are already having regular sex. I just don't know what I should feel like.

You just do you. There is no problem being a virgin, i only necked on with someone once up until like june and im 16. I still havent done nothing sexual but most people i know have and they ALL have a regret.
Some of them feel bad that they did so much stuff early, some of them regret the person, and some of them think theyve done it with too many people.

In a couple years they will all be regretting some of the people they done things with and you are going to be laughing at them because you took your time and chose wisely

[Lukir]

whaat 14 and shame cause virgin?
u gotta be kidding me, here in my country its a shame if someone isnt virgin at 14 (espec girls).
I hope those kids are lying they are not virgins ._.

[SethfromMI]

your 14 man. some people do it at that age (I did) but there is NO rush to do it. there is never a reason to be ashamed about being a virgin. never let someone pressure you into doing something, do it because you want to

[ClaraWho]

Any chimp with genitals has the capacity to have sex. There's nothing special about 'shagging', if anything, it's primitive.

So you have to decide, do you want to just have sex with some cheap girl just to say you have? Or do you want to make it something special and intimate you only share with the right girl?

This 'indirect pressure' is entirely in your own head, you are creating that narrative to what you are hearing around you. If you choose to make it special, then own that. Make it your new narrative and let them make their mistakes.

Cheap, quick thrills never beat long-term happiness. Fools rush in!

~ Clara

[Dying Ember]

Jesus you're only 14 WHY ON EARTH IS THERE NEED TO HAVE SEX AT THAT AGE

[Babs]

Yo dude, I know everyone says this but there really is no reason to rush anything. It really doesn't matter if you're still a virgin at 14, 18, 25, whenever. That's YOUR personal business, and no one else's.

[Syzygy]

Any chimp with genitals has the capacity to have sex. There's nothing special about 'shagging', if anything, it's primitive.

So you have to decide, do you want to just have sex with some cheap girl just to say you have? Or do you want to make it something special and intimate you only share with the right girl?

This 'indirect pressure' is entirely in your own head, you are creating that narrative to what you are hearing around you. If you choose to make it special, then own that. Make it your new narrative and let them make their mistakes.

Cheap, quick thrills never beat long-term happiness. Fools rush in!

~ Clara
----

[Hudor]

Sex shouldn't be a milestone that you have to cross in order to be a proper part of society. If everyone around you is having sex that's their choice and their bodies. It's your choice when you want to have sex. I feel the act is as much about the pleasure as the bond you share with that person. Reserve that privilege for someone you truly value. Make it special that way rather than doing it because it is supposed to be special.
Don't let others steer your life for you.

[Januarist2000]

You should actually be happy that you are a virgin! I don't think it should be something to brag about or be rushed to do.

There can be consequences with having sex at an early age. You risk yourself getting STD's or a deadly disease transferred through sex, and it can effect your marriage later in life.

[Broken Toy]

In all fairness some people are like shocked he is being pressured into not being a virgin at14, but i know someone who has bucked 31 people and shes 16. And i also know some people who lost their virginity at 12.

[fast8]

You shouldn't do anything until you are ready don't do it because others are doing it some may just be lying to try and fit in others may have really done it but that's there life you live yours better off waiting for the right partner before doing it you don't want to get any kind of STDs some can even kill you there is nothing worng with being a virgin

[Steve Jobs]

Trust me, the respect you gain from being a virgin at 18 or 20 is far greater than any shame you get from the twatty kids at your age.

The time will come and it'll come naturally, so don't even worry about it for now.

I'm not by any means against you wishing to go out and have a great time if you've found your special one, but don't be pressured to do something against your will :P

[Abhorrence]

Guaranteed that some of the people that have apparently lost their virginity at fourteen are lying. I know loads of people who lied about it. Anyways, you don't need to do it just because others are. Do it because you're in love, because you want to, because you are happy and comfortable with a person. Do not do anything just because you want to be like others or because you want to brag about it, that's not only a silly thing to do - it might not be very nice on the person you end up having sex with, they might want to keep it secretive because girls have a hard time during teen years with being called a slut if they're sexually active. It is wrong but ya know, it is what it is.

[Manboy321]

Don't wrry to much

[Body odah Man]

First off, I apologize if I didn't put this in the correct place. I haven't dated a girl in a few months, but I've been coming across more and more people (in my class) who aren't virgins anymore. This includes one of my ex-girlfriends (this really bugged me). Everyone is indirectly making it seem as though being a virgin is bad. Even though I know this isn't true, I still feel as though I don't fit in because I haven't had sex yet. To make matters worse, it seems like everywhere I go, 13 year olds are already having regular sex. I just don't know what I should feel like.

Feel glad you're not messed up like they are. Seriously dude, sex should be a thing you do because you long for the connection it brings between you and the girl. It should NOT be something you do cuz everyone does it/to lose your virginity/ to lose lust/ to satiate carnal pleasures, etc. etc. Just wait for it to happen and wait for the right moment.

[Stronk Serb]

Don't bother with it. There are a lit of braggarts who say that they banged but have only seen a naked girl in a porno. Sex should be a bonding experience, not something casual like hanging out with friends.

[tonymontana99]

Damn you guys in America don't play around. But seriously, there's nothing wrong with it. It's only worrying if you're a virgin by the time you're over 18, and even then you can just go to a brothel and get it done with if it's worrying you so much. Just make sure to have condoms whenever you're going to a party or place where you are sure something's going down. First priority in your head (no pun intended) is to make sure youll be safe from STIs. Also, don't wait for "the right girl", nothing's permanent in these years. Just don't do it with the school's slut or someone who'll laugh at your inexperience and you'll be good to go. (If the girl isn't a virgin, there's no shame in asking her to "guide" you).

Also, depending on your own beliefs (religious setbacks, personal morals, etc.) you maybe should disregard that part of not waiting for the right girl? In my opinion, I think first-time sex is to experiment, know your body and what gets you and girls on, sort of like testing the waters. It'll most likely be miserable. And if you care about your ideal girl's satisfaction and pleasure, you'd definitely pass on keeping yourself for her the first time and just have sex with someone you think you'll feel okay with for you to become more experienced and consequently deliver better performance for your "right girl". You don't run a marathon without training first.

PS: Google "Virgin age meter" and stop jerking off to porn online and go out.

[Daily]

We live in a world filled with whores and scoundrels. Get over with it.

[Paladino]

Your 14 there is no rush

Exactly! When I was 14 all i was interested in was playing football and xbox like so many other boys!! Take your time & do it when you feel ready to.

[Yolodolo]

Don't worry about it!

[everlong]

You should have absolutely no shame in being a virgin. You have plenty of time, there's no need to rush it.

[NorthSeaGirl]

Do not believe - I would say - half of them.

[Tesserax]

16 and still a virgin, don't worry, just be patient and do what feels right for you. People are assholes, get used to it, and just remember that the more ass you get as a child, the more ass you'll kiss as an adult.

[Ollie2000]

15 here and still a virgin, no need to rush into anything. You can only loose it once - so when you do you want to make sure it is right!

[mattsmith48]

First off, I apologize if I didn't put this in the correct place. I haven't dated a girl in a few months, but I've been coming across more and more people (in my class) who aren't virgins anymore. This includes one of my ex-girlfriends (this really bugged me). Everyone is indirectly making it seem as though being a virgin is bad. Even though I know this isn't true, I still feel as though I don't fit in because I haven't had sex yet. To make matters worse, it seems like everywhere I go, 13 year olds are already having regular sex. I just don't know what I should feel like.

Your 14 some of your friends in your class are probably lying about it anyway.
Trust me after you do it you wont give a shit how old you were.

[lliam]

Everyone is indirectly making it seem as though being a virgin is bad.

It isn't about innocence - it's just about having sex. Indirectly, it's nothing but the instinct of reproducing. Also, very few young people have sex with 13 or 14.
Although I wish I was one of those few who have it not. And all this fuss about "losing innocence" or "innocence" itself seens to me pure bullsh..beep...beep. That's why I decided to see it all more relaxed.

[Baileyy]

You do you man.

You should never feel pressured to lose your virginity.