Problem with my GF

[PastaProMaker]

So.. this is going to be a long thread and I hope I'm in the right section. I'll try to make it simple and be as gramatically correct as I can (living in Italy, it's quite hard to speak proper English).
Basically, at the beginning of May, I felt pretty damn useless because I had pretty much no friends (apart from the ones I have online), until I met this girl, who we will call B. B decided it was time for me to get out of sadness and start living again, and she actually managed to. B made me meet G, my current girlfriend. We dated for a bit, until on the 12th of May we decided it was the time for us to stay together. I was very happy and bla bla bla.. until B started smoking. Now I'm not against smoking: you can do whatever you want with your life, it's none of my business. I tried to stop her, because I didn't like seeing her life "ruined", being she such an awesome person. Along with that, G started becoming colder and colder towards me: slow text replies (I do that too, but I don't ignore messages if I see them) and if she has a minimum amount of distraction, she doesn't talk to me at all. If we hang out alone, she might interrupt our petting with her phone. If we hang out with her friends (which are also mine), she doesn't talk to me unless she wants a kiss, a hug or in general something physical. What if I try to joke with her when her friends are there? She ignores me and goes to talk to other people. I'd like now to introduce M. M is a piece of s*** who thinks he is the king of the world and everyone should respect him. Everyone in our friends' group hate him, but G apparently prefers joking with him rather than me. Our first month of relationship goes by and we start touching each other for the first time. I like it, but a side of me says "Are you sure bro?". Could someone PM me whether that's normal or not?
I then started thinking she wouldn't just randomly leave me alone and I still think that's true. Last weekend, we decided to hang out and because she couldn't be bothered with me at all, while we were all walking I decided to randomly disappear (I told a friend of mine to tell me about her reaction). What happened is.. she started looking for a hug from me but of course she didn't find me, so she left the group and started looking for me. When she found me we got back to the others and she started not caring about me again. B then started handing cigarettes to G, which I didn't particularly like. if someone doesn't smoke, why would you help him to start the habit? That led me to argue with B and I'll ask her sorry tomorrow. Hopefully it will work Is this how a relation is supposed to be? Rare talking and lots of petting in private?
I can't leave her if you think that's the solutions. All my friends would think I'm a dick and I don't feel like losing all of them. I might try making her feel jealous and stop looking for her when with others, hopefully it'll do the trick. What else can I try?

[The37thElement]

I think you should address your concerns to her. I know it seems scary, but she might listen. This will test whether or not she really cares about you. If she does, than she will accept the fact that she is doing things that make you concerned. If she pushes it off or becomes RUDE (rude and upset are two different things) with you, then this tells you that she isn't worth your time and effort. Good luck!

[PastaProMaker]

I tried talking to her already, it wasn't very helpful.. we came to the conclusion that she "would try to care about me if she notices she is ignoring me"

[The37thElement]

That seems like a fair deal. In that case, I would try to exploit her promise. Avoid her (without making it seem too obvious) and she will probably think that she is ignoring you too much as a natural reaction to not seeing you.

[PastaProMaker]

Thanks a lot, I'll do that tomorrow (y)

[The37thElement]

No problem! Let me know how it goes!

[Uniquemind]

I also suspect there's tension between B and G. It's very subtle but I sense it.

I can't quite say for certain it's over you but it could be.

I certainly think you are being played by G.

And power games are at work here...be warned experience has taught me this complicates relationship communication unnecessarily.

[PastaProMaker]

We are currently hanging out with 3 other couples, however she prefers talking to B while all the others are kissing. Regarding a possible tension between B and G.. I can't completely exclude it but it's very very unlikely (they act and behave as best friends)

[DoodleSnap]

First off, might I say that your English is great! - A lot better than my Italian :P

As to your issue, my best advice is to speak to her.
Communication is one of the most important parts of any relationship. Unspoken issues that remain unsolved weaken relationships, I can say that from personal experience. If someone is honest and communicates with their significant other, then they can solve problems together with both perspectives, rather than by themselves.
When you realised that you were worried about the situation when you started touching her, that means that you need to talk. She clearly isn't being open with you, and doesn't want to start speaking, so you need to initiate a conversation. Be honest, work together, and let each other calmly state both perspectives. Whatever happens with your relationship, you can be sure that if you communicate effectively, then you will be on honest, speaking terms with each other.
I hope all goes well, and good luck.

[PastaProMaker]

Thanks for all of your replies :D anyhow considering the whole day we spent together, it went a bit better than normal, she wasn't just minding her own business all the time. Hopefully it'll stay like this. We're going shopping tomorrow, we'll see how it goes. I'll keep you updated.
Doodle read my previous replies, we talked about it and we didn't come to great conclusion... let's call it an improvement rather (which I'm quite happy with)