Should i or shouldn't i?

[Hudor]

Basically I don't know how to make head or tail of a friend(call him A) that I have been seriously been considering for a relationship.
A little background story. My best friend told A about me half an year ago. He let me know when he told A but A never made any move to talk to me back then and we both guessed he had got cold feet. Then three months ago, A sent me a friend request on fb and soon after I accepted, I had a message in the inbox from him. We clicked very well. We had a lot of similar interests and he sounds very very similar to me.
I told my best friend about A and asked him for some info about A. He told me he's a nice guy and that he took guarantee for him. For the past three months, we've been talking over text and phone about anything and everything ( we haven't met yet but we both plan to). And I feel we click really well.


Now the problem.
1. I don't get to talk to him a lot these days because first he went for a trip for a fortnight leaving behind all gadgets. Though he messaged me the day he returned, a few days later he deactivated WhatsApp because apparently he didn't like the interface and communication was only possible now was if I called him. We mutually decided to keep calls restricted to only Saturdays. But then even before he left he seemed more and more aloof to me. It was always me who was initiating convos which at best seemed like I was prizing replies out of him. So I want so sure of calling. I thought it may be the exam pressure and he might not want to be disturbed. But the problem is he didn't call back either. Anyway the next Saturday I was ill so I texted him to let him know and he immediately called and we talked. And two days ago was my birthday and he was the first person to wish me.

2. Basically I don't understand what goes wrong when we are messaging. On phone he sounds pretty interested and involved in everything i have been doing and we can talk for hours. But when i am texting him on fb (because he returned yet though he plans to deactivate it) or convos are strained at best even if i talk to him after a few days to a week.

3. Then on my birthday i called him up later in the day but he didn't pick the call. I texted him later to let him know i called. And all he said was "I know."
Now there have been instances when he called and I didn't pick up the call but I always called back later to ley him know why.
We haven't talked since then. I sent him this. "Just let me know when you don't wanna talk in future. Communication gaps are shitty." I haven't got a reply since.

I don't understand what to make of it. Any advice would be appreciated.

[Microcosm]

That last part kind of got to me. It really sucks when you send something blunt like that but you don't mean for it to like offend them or anything and you never get a response. I've done that before and I always feel extremely bad like I did something terribly wrong. Of course, I don't think you did anything wrong, here. It seems like his denial of your attempts to contact him has really hindered you being able to bond with him. So, the fault is not yours, but I think it's his.

However, I think the best thing you can do to revive the relationship is to meet with him in person. Asking him if he wants to meet in person would show him that you are willing to take the initiative and be there for him. It also shows him that you are really interested.

[Hudor]

That last part kind of got to me. It really sucks when you send something blunt like that but you don't mean for it to like offend them or anything and you never get a response. I've done that before and I always feel extremely bad like I did something terribly wrong. Of course, I don't think you did anything wrong, here. It seems like his denial of your attempts to contact him has really hindered you being able to bond with him. So, the fault is not yours, but I think it's his.

However, I think the best thing you can do to revive the relationship is to meet with him in person. Asking him if he wants to meet in person would show him that you are willing to take the initiative and be there for him. It also shows him that you are really interested.

I actually have a plan to meet him in June. It's a slim chance but I let him know anyway. It's a slim chance because I am trying to make the visit happen but I'll most probably be going with my parents who want to visit a relative, so it they cancel their plan, I would have to cancel mine too. But I let him know that and he was like let's see. He doubted it would happen and tbh I doubt it too. But every time we talk he's like we'll do this and that when we meet. But yes I agree I should make a definite plan and try to meet him soon.

I am trying to be there as much as I can for him.
We discussed long distance relationships and he had no problem with one but he seemed unsure to be in a relationship. I asked him what he would do if someone he liked back proposed to him and he was confused. I've let him be and am okay if he wants to take time out and isn't ready for a relationship but this about more than the relationship factor. I feel our friendship is being jeopardized by these communication gaps.

Even besides that I think he might not be getting the right signals. I'm not the most expressive person. Maybe I'm not communicating effectively that I am interested in him?

[Foamy]

I had a similar(ish) experience during the fall semester. I met this guy (through a "friend") and we started clicking pretty quickly. At one point he wanted to go further and I was still a tad uneasy about having a boyf. I came around pretty quickly though but he wasn't fond of the idea like I wasn't at first. Then over the winter break we had the communication gaps like you have now, and when I brought those up he officially broke off the chance of the relationship happening. He still wanted a purely sexual relationship which I wasn't to keen on.

How my situation relates to yours is the communication gaps basically. Once I brought them up it was basically the rest of the break for me to get over him. You could be more direct but I have no idea how A would react, if at all. I hope things work themselves out. ^.^

[Hudor]

EDIT: Turns out I was overreacting. There was nothing wrong with him and things are back to normal(with him) kinda. Anyway thanks people. :)
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