NikkiNicole
May 17th, 2015, 07:47 PM
This is just going to be a short (or long) rant. Don't know yet, I'm just getting started. :rolleyes:
I have two extremes. Either I'm on Cloud 9 and happy as can be or facedown in the dirt filled with anger, self hate and disgust. I have no middle ground.
Life for me lately has beeenn alittle. . .up and down.
I've found a job and I'm pretty happy with that but I find it kind of hard fitting into the in crowd. Everyone else there has been there so long i just feel kind of out of place sometimes. The Anti-Socialist in my makes it hard for me to open up and make new friends but I try. . .
Graduation is in a week. Not for me, but for the a BUNCH of my friend. My whole entire class is graduating this year and I'm stuck one year behind them. It should have been me but. . .whatever.
I look around me very often and feel sort of without. I lack something everyone else seems to have. I know no one has it all together but I'm the most "non-having-it-together" person I know and it makes me feel kinda hopeless.
I don't have many friends. Well, I DO but once again, that anti-socialist won't allow me to get close to anyone to have a substantial solid friendship. It's like I don't see myself worthy of it so I don't try.
I'm hungry.
Haha, sorry. Off track. I often wonder what is wrong with me. I wonder this often. I've considered seeking help but I dunno. .
I pray over the Summer I can manage to do some serious soul searching and help myself but I find that this that has been going on for months is far past the stage of Self Help. .
I have two extremes. Either I'm on Cloud 9 and happy as can be or facedown in the dirt filled with anger, self hate and disgust. I have no middle ground.
Life for me lately has beeenn alittle. . .up and down.
I've found a job and I'm pretty happy with that but I find it kind of hard fitting into the in crowd. Everyone else there has been there so long i just feel kind of out of place sometimes. The Anti-Socialist in my makes it hard for me to open up and make new friends but I try. . .
Graduation is in a week. Not for me, but for the a BUNCH of my friend. My whole entire class is graduating this year and I'm stuck one year behind them. It should have been me but. . .whatever.
I look around me very often and feel sort of without. I lack something everyone else seems to have. I know no one has it all together but I'm the most "non-having-it-together" person I know and it makes me feel kinda hopeless.
I don't have many friends. Well, I DO but once again, that anti-socialist won't allow me to get close to anyone to have a substantial solid friendship. It's like I don't see myself worthy of it so I don't try.
I'm hungry.
Haha, sorry. Off track. I often wonder what is wrong with me. I wonder this often. I've considered seeking help but I dunno. .
I pray over the Summer I can manage to do some serious soul searching and help myself but I find that this that has been going on for months is far past the stage of Self Help. .