In love with my straight (i think) bestfriend...

[ItsJustJack]

Hi,

So basically i have my closest friend, and he is pretty much perfect; cute, hilarious and a good person to be around. kinda a problem though, im bi and he's straight (i think) and im properly in love with him.

A lot of people will tell me to tell him about my feelings for him but its not that simple. Hes the kind of person who can flip very easily and who wouldnt deal too well with that kind of thing.

However, there's a very slim possibility that he might be bi or even just willing to experiment. There was one time when he was staying over at mine and we were in the same bed and he was lying there with his head on my chest with his arm half hugging me, then i said something, he laughed then kind of sat up a little and put his head over mine so his lips were a few inches from mine. then he looked into my eyes and kind of moved in a tiny bit but i didnt move or anything cos i was too scared if i kissed him it would all go wrong. so he just kind of laughed again then went back to his old position.

i guess i can never tell him or try anything really because i value our friendship too high and dont want to risk all that by making it awkward or making him feel uncomfortable.

i dont know im lost and just want to hear some words of advice...

[Vermilion]

You need to tell him that you have feelings for him, I know you said you can't but he should understand. he mite feel the same way

[jssixna]

If you fear he will end the friendship, I would not tell him. Look for more signs about him and his sexuality. Ask him Qs but don't make it too obvious. Also if he is actually straight there isn't much you can do to change it.

[Seahawks15]

Be very careful with him.Get more information about his sexual orientation before spilling all the beans that you like him.If you out of the blue say that you like him he could suddenly end the friendship.Go slow and take your time.You don't want to rush these kind of things.You also don't want to plan out experimentation because that never works.

[Abhorrence]

Does he know you're bisexual?

[ItsJustJack]

Thanks for all the support and advice guys it means a lot!

One thing i forgot to mention is that when we were really drunk (one reason i only really properly remembered now) is he decided to have a shower and asked me and another friend to join him completely naked in the shower. me and the other guy got out after a while and he just stood there naked chatting to us, not covering up or anything.

idk i still think im kind of holding onto thin air but...

[DoodleSnap]

First of all, I think that it would be beneficial for you to think about what it was like for you discovering what your sexuality was, and understanding the feelings one has as part of your orientation. Think about what it was like being confused and unsure of your sexuality. I know that I personally didn't even consider the feelings I had towards boys as anything but looking up to them, and didn't even think I could be anything other than straight. Only after finding out that these feelings I had were ones of attraction and had a sexual dimension to them did I even consider looking into giving myself a different label. All of these sorts of feelings are common to any teenagers and people who are maturing, and your friend (by the sounds of it) may be too. I think that speaking to him about sexuality, from your point of view, may give him food for thought to contemplate his. Try speaking to him about your experience with finding out your sexuality, and how you interpreted the feelings you had. Coming out to him, and giving him an insight into your own mind might provoke him to give it further thought and maybe even come out to you in the future, if he decides that a label other than straight is appropriate for him. As I always say, communication is the basis of any relationship, so speak to him. Just remember that everyone goes through a different way of approaching the confusing world f sexuality, so be patient and let him take his own path. Only once you have approached and resolved the subject of sexuality would I urge you to consider pursuing a romantic relationship. Just take it slow, and be clear and reasoned. Good luck.

[CallumLikesBoys]

Are you not out yet?

[ItsJustJack]

Not outt