Mom forcing me to go to Gyno...

[SmokyChica]

My Mom found hidden pregnancy testing sticks in my room... Now she doesn't believe that I haven't had sex (she doesn't know I really have, and I can't tell her). Now she is forcing me to go to a gynecologist tomorrow and I'm scared. I had sex this past weekend but took the pill. Will the doctor be able to tell? Will my mom find out? Please someone help me. I'm freaking out. :(

[BlackParadePixie]

You need to just be honest with your mom and fess up. She found the pregnancy tests...what other reason would you have them for if you're not having sex? That makes no sense at all.

[SmokyChica]

I told her I was holding them for a friend whose parents snoop through her room. She can't know that I've done it.

[Beth]

Moms are not blind as they were one time teenagers them self. I would confess and tell the truth so she can help with the best birth protection for you. Going to the gyno maybe best. Honesty is the best policy.

[nicole97]

Usually Doctors can't tell whether or not you've had sex through examinations. I would recommend and advise for complete honesty, but if you're not willing to come clean to your mom you should definitely be honest with your Doctor. Their only there to help you and due to confidentiality laws nothing you disclose to them will get back to your parents with your permission.

[SmokyChica]

So if I told the doctor that I have done it, she wouldn't be allowed to tell my mom if I said not to?

[jenni31]

Corrine how old are you? Because yes you can request the doctor for confidentiality but if you're under a certain age and your moms in there and she probably will be then you need to be honest with your mom and say mom I was very scared and I know you will be upset with me but I want to be honest with you going forward so I get the best care possible and yes she will be upset at first but she will get over it and that will help improve the communication between you your mom and your doctor I agree with all the girls above

[sweettayla]

I don't think a doctor can tell if you've had sex or not, but in the long run, it's probably easier to be honest with your mum.

[devon girl]

they can see if ur hython is broken (cant spell disletic sorry) but tbh i think u should tell the truth cos ur going to make it worst

[Elysium]

they can see if ur hython is broken (cant spell disletic sorry) but tbh i think u should tell the truth cos ur going to make it worst
That's not how the hymen works. A doctor cannot tell if you've ever had sex based on the condition of your hymen (though in some cases I suppose it may be possible that a doctor could tell if you've given birth). If there's any sort of tearing from recent penetration or intercourse, a doctor will see it, but if it's been long enough after the incident then there's no way a doctor can tell if you've had sex or not.

I'd do some research on doctor-patient confidentiality laws for minors. I don't know the deal with that off the top of my head.

[Uniquemind]

That's not how the hymen works. A doctor cannot tell if you've ever had sex based on the condition of your hymen (though in some cases I suppose it may be possible that a doctor could tell if you've given birth). If there's any sort of tearing from recent penetration or intercourse, a doctor will see it, but if it's been long enough after the incident then there's no way a doctor can tell if you've had sex or not.

I'd do some research on doctor-patient confidentiality laws for minors. I don't know the deal with that off the top of my head.


If a pediatrician or general adult doctor indicated in their files for their own notes about an unstretched or "unbroken" hymen (it never really breaks unless one had a very prominent hymen, and again not all girls are born with a hymen) on a patient they might be able to compare contrast last checkup's notes with what's different in the in-progress checkup.


But they might not be able to assume sexual intercourse broke/stretched the hymen.

1. Sex toys can do the same physical result.


What will give it away though is vaginal tearing if from a rape or really rough sex that was recent. Or scarring from trauma from the above left untreated.

[Elysium]

If a pediatrician or general adult doctor indicated in their files for their own notes about an unstretched or "unbroken" hymen (it never really breaks unless one had a very prominent hymen, and again not all girls are born with a hymen) on a patient they might be able to compare contrast last checkup's notes with what's different in the in-progress checkup.


But they might not be able to assume sexual intercourse broke/stretched the hymen.

1. Sex toys can do the same physical result.


What will give it away though is vaginal tearing if from a rape or really rough sex that was recent. Or scarring from trauma from the above left untreated.
You're right. I should've clarified that a doctor wouldn't be able to necessarily tell, and even if they did note a difference, would never be able to conclusively chalk it up to sex if the patient didn't explicitly say so. With all the variety in hymens and vaginas, it's certainly possible, though not a guarantee, that a doctor could observe a change. The point being, the hymen is not broken once and for all and you're done. And intercourse isn't the only thing that can cause vaginal tearing or disruption; sex toys, yes, but also some forms of physical activity (horseback riding is a popular one) or even using tampons.

[Uniquemind]

You're right. I should've clarified that a doctor wouldn't be able to necessarily tell, and even if they did note a difference, would never be able to conclusively chalk it up to sex if the patient didn't explicitly say so. With all the variety in hymens and vaginas, it's certainly possible, though not a guarantee, that a doctor could observe a change. The point being, the hymen is not broken once and for all and you're done. And intercourse isn't the only thing that can cause vaginal tearing or disruption; sex toys, yes, but also some forms of physical activity (horseback riding is a popular one) or even using tampons.


Soccer, gymnastics, cheerleading, martial arts....*sighs* the list goes on an on.


Basically if the activity involves the legs or crotch movements, the hymen might be gone via other means other than intercourse or penetration.

Also for those whose hymens were stretched that way, it actually might make first time sex that much easier for them. But by no means is an endorsement to be careless or think there won't be discomfort and rush into things.

I've also been told childbirth is more painful than hymen breaking/stretching, so worrying about pain is redundant if a girl plans on having sex with no condom and no birth control pill.


If your goal was to avoid pain this does not logically compute.