Corrupt-A-Wish

[Giles]

He never speaks to you again.

I wish this one woman would shut up.

[Quick_Sylver]

They lose their tongue, indeed shutting them up.


I wish that my touch lamp would stop being tempermental.

[Giles]

It never works when you touch it again.

I wish my school was brighter.

[Alfred Pennyworth]

Your school becomes so bright that it causes the eyeballs of everyone that sees it to explode.

I that i didn't have to wait until i am 16 to get my permit. :(

[Quick_Sylver]

You don't but you crash into a semi, killing two pedestrians.


I wish that my (guy)friends weren't douches.

[Giles]

Your guy friends aren't douches anymore, buy your girl friends are now.

[that kid]

I wish I would get straight As

[L]

the schooling system changes, and As become a bad grade.

i wish my wish wont become corrupt.

[Iron Man]

your wish doesn`t get corrupted, but your face does. i wish i can leave this planet on a starship and explore the stars

[that kid]

Your ship malfunctions and you crash into a star.

I wish I had super powers

[BlackBetty]

You get super powers, and then they are so strong, they kill you.

I wish I had 5000+ post.

[Malcolm Tucker]

You get 5000 posts, then decide to celebrate by running outside, when you are run over.

I wish for peace.

[BlackBetty]

You get peace, when the world blows up from volcanoes.

I wish i had a new phone.

[that kid]

You get a plastic Barbie phone.

I wish I had my own personal universe

[BlackBetty]

Your universe blows up

Wishes the computer wasn't a douche.

[mexa]

The computer is actually you.

I wish I could drive.

[Iron Man]

you get arrested for dui. i wish i could be rich beyond my wildest dreams

[BlackBetty]

you get rich, and then you die suddenly

i wish i was - in the rep.

[Iron Man]

you get banned also. i wish that i could sucker punch osama in the face

[BlackBetty]

Before you draw back, he shoots you.

I wish it won't snow tuesday... *sighs*

[Iron Man]

It does worse than snow on tuesday. i wish i could think of more wishes

[BlackBetty]

I wish you wouldn't think of wishes

I wish all this shit would dissapear. Or take me with you.

[Iron Man]

Some idiot burys you in manure. I wish that Cheney didn`t scare the crap out of me.

[cdtcmdr]

granted, But that's because you die in a non-Cheney related car accident.
I wish I could be on the first flight of the 747.

[cdtcmdr]

How About an Aviadvigatel PS90 Engine? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aviadvigatel_PS90)

[Iron Man]

dont know what that is but it sounds russian, therefore it might explode

[L]

i wish myself and everybody on the planet will have a perfect life and die painlessly at an old age.

[Giles]

Everyone dies painlessly at an old age, but forget to have children therefore the human species on Earth becomes extinct.

I wish I didn't have any after school lessons.

[Katrina]

But you would have no time away from school ie all 24 hours in school studying.
I wish there were no examination.

[Alfred Pennyworth]

there is no exam. instead, you have to right a 20,000 word essay

i wish that it wasn't snowing

[that kid]

It starts hailing 20 pound chunks of ice.

I wish I had milk for my cereal

[L]

you get your milk, but you also become lactose intolerant, and the milk kills you.

i wish myself and everybody in the world to have a perfect life, have children, and die painlessly at an old age, and for the same thing to happen to everyone in all of the future generations.

(haha, take THAT Ben :D)

[that kid]

Whenever someone dies they suffer in Hell for all eternity

I wish humans found other peaceful lifeforms in our universe

[L]

they find peaceful lifeforms, but those lifeforms are being invaded by evil ones that after learning of the existence of humans, invade us.

i wish myself and everybody in the world to have a perfect life, have children, and die painlessly at an old age, and have a perfect afterlife, and for the same thing to happen to everyone in all of the future generations.

(eventually i'll come up with an uncorruptable wish :D)

[lysiaboy]

the Kitty is the rabid tony tiger guy from TV, who steals all your cereal.

I wish that I could be normal

[Death]

You become 'normal', but then realise that you are still different because no-one's the same as anyone.

I wish that my Windows 7 (which I thankfully don't have to use for the internet) would stop crashing whenever it wanted.

[Setzer]

win 7 doesn't crash, a car in your house does.

I wish I had an angel U_U

[Skeln]

All he/she does is preach to you day and night and never quits...ever

I wish I could live in Australia

[that kid]

Australia is nuked.

I wish L made an uncorruptable wish

[CaliKid24]

L made an uncorruptable wish but his computer explodes before he can post it.

i wish that i had an infinite amount of orange juice. i love orange juice.

[starbrite5]

The orange juice is poisoned.

I wish for a human-poodle chimera.

[CaliKid24]

i wish that it gets struck by lightening during a huge storm.
u poisoned my orange juice >:[

i wish i had a dog.

[John Marston]

you get the dog but it runs away

i wish for a decent christmas tree

[Magus]

Granted, but it got burned when the light-show switched on.

I wish for a fish.

[Death]

The fish turns out to be heavily irradiated.

I wish that nothing would ever go wrong in my life.

[derkderpderp]

instead of going right it goes left to wherever you're willing to take it.

I wish for a giant gummy bear to eat the stereotypical people in the world

[Death]

But it turns out that the gummy bear is a herbivore so it can't eat anyone.

I wish that my wishes weren't corrupted.

[Magus]

Granted, but they are defiled.

I wish for an Ice-Cream.

[Death]

You get it, but it's all melted all over you.

I wish that the sky was red.

[Magus]

Granted, now God will smite you for going against the laws of physics.

I wish for a band T-Shirt.

[Death]

Granted, but then God smites you for beeing greedy.

I wish that Toby my pet rabbit could talk in our language.

[Simply Someone]

Granted, but he speaks in a language you can't understand.

I wish I could have a maid to clean my house.

[Death]

Your maid charges more money that you can can ever acquire in a lifetime.

I wish that Earth doubled in total volume with the new surface area being natural.

[Simply Someone]

Granted, but then the gravitational force it has with the sun is unbalanced and it runs into Mars, causing everyone to die.

I wish that I was the smartest person alive.

[Magus]

Granted, but you are now the ugliest person around too.

I wish for a new PC.

[that kid]

You get a Mac.

I wish for three more wishes.

[that kid]

You get a Mac.

I wish for three more wishes.

[Sith Lord 13]

They all backfire in horrible ways.

I wish for the perfect world.

[that kid]

The perfect world is made but all the humans are extinct.

I wish I could walk into TV shows

[kyle92]

the TV explodes and you cant get out

i wish my boyfriend moved back home

[that kid]

Your boyfriend moves back home and breaks up with you

I wish I had my own successful business

[Sith Lord 13]

You have your successful business, but then the IRS shut you down for tax fraud. Have fun in prison.

I wish to be all powerful with no limits whatsoever.

[that kid]

You become all powerful but are trapped in an empty universe with no escape.

I wish there was no war

[Sith Lord 13]

Your wish comes true when all the nukes simultaneously explode, destroying the earth.

I wish to be happy forever.

[Death]

Your wish comes true when you are captured by evil scientists and then stuck in a simulation, a 'dream world', where you can never escape.

I wish that I knew everything there was, is, and ever will be to know.

[that kid]

You find out that everything you know is a lie and you will be betrayed by everyone you love in the future.

I wish I could walk through walls

[Sith Lord 13]

You fall through to the center of the earth and get roasted alive.

I wish to be smart.

[Death]

You become smart enough to hack a terminal to unlock the door to an area where you think a large heap of money is kept. Instead, you get heavily irradiated and don't realise until it's too late.

I wish that I was a tropical bird who lived in the Amazon Rainforest.

[that kid]

You and your species become extinct.

I wish I could live for 1000 years

[Sith Lord 13]

You outlive everyone you ever cared about, and spend a majority of your life waiting to die.




I wish to have power over death.

[dhjgfdgrrr]

you get power over death, but on a condition: You must kill your best friend

I wish for success

[Sith Lord 13]

You succeed at failing

I wish for an incorruptible wish.

[dhjgfdgrrr]

you get your wish...which rips a hole in the fabric of space/time...


I wish for a hot guy :)

[Sith Lord 13]

You get a hot guy, who gives you ever STD known to man and then dumps you, leaving you heartbroken.

I wish for everyone in the world to be perfectly happy, always.

[Death]

Then nothing ever feels good because there's nothing bad to give the perspective.

I wish I was Chuck Norris.

[jimmycouch14]

You become Chuck Norris and then a 13 year kicks your ass.

I wish I could meet the forefathers of Great Britain and the US.

[[[chickaroo92]]]

You only got to see two of them.
I wish I could be in the cast of Glee.

[Sith Lord 13]

They meet you, then point and laugh at you until you slink away.

I wish for everyone I know to be perfectly happy.

[[[chickaroo92]]]

>.< Most horrible corruption ever... ha.

Hmmm :/

Everyone is happy, besides yourself.

I wish that I can move to Israel already!

[jimmycouch14]

You move only to find out it really never existed.

I wish every time someone tried to corrupt my wish that they liked me so much they couldn’t do it.

[iamniokekun]

I don't try....I DO. Consider yourself corrupted. >: D

I wish that I will do well in college. :3

[Night_Hawk]

You Do well in college but never get a job, and become homeless

I wish my pencil worked xD

[jimmycouch14]

Your pencil works but you got all stupid and forgot how to write.:D:D

I wish I had a pizza.

[CaliKid24]

I wish u get food poisoning from the pizza.


I wish I could drive.

[Sith Lord 13]

You drive off a cliff.

I wish for an incorruptible wish.

[Magus]

Granted, but it is a broken wish.

I wish for a new mechanical pencil!

[Sith Lord 13]

It's out of lead and has no eraser

I wish for a meteor to destroy the earth

[Magus]

Granted, but the meteor was disintegrated by the multi-gravitational ionic megaton Sigma emitter cannon.

I wish for a multi-gravitational ionic megaton Sigma emitter rifle.

[Sith Lord 13]

You receive it, and it promptly blows up in your hands, horribly maiming you for the rest of your life.


I wish for the destruction of the earth.

[Magus]

Granted, but the construction of the new Luna Aeries artificial colony is done, and now people have went there.

I wish for a new Cyberpunk novel.

[iamniokekun]

It was destroyed along with the earth.

I wish to get over my insomnia.

[Death]

You end up getting insomnia in reverse and you are constantly asleep and you never wake up...

I wish that grass was red.

[[[chickaroo92]]]

Your lawn is the only thing that is red.

I wish to have a boyfriend.

[Magus]

Granted, you got an ass of a boyfriend.

I wish for a new video game console.

[[[chickaroo92]]]

It died on you the first week you got it.

I wish for All Time Low to come sing me a song.

[Death]

They sing, and they keep singing, and they never ever stop...

I wish that there was no discrimination of any kind in the world.

[Magus]

Granted, now everything is boring because everyone looks the damn same!

I wish for a new image file.
http://www.seriezeta.com/madworld/media/uploads/2009/03/amiga.jpg

[Death]

Granted, but it shows two ancient, wrinkly, repulsive grandmas scissoring each other.

I wish that the Earth orbited the sun at thrice its normal speed.

[pixie1234]

granted but the speed makes the earth spin off corse

i wish that heart ache didnt exsist xx

[Sith Lord 13]

Granted, but without the pain life becomes meaningless.

I wish for my wish to be corrupted.

[Magus]

(Now everyone has adapted my "Granted, but .." style, eh?)

Granted, it is now a paradox.

I wish for a new world order.

[Night_Hawk]

There's a new world Order, but humans are now slaves to evil Cookies :P

[CantBeTamed]

you didnt make a wish

my wish

i wish justin bieber was my husband

[Continuum]

Granted, but he became a full-fledged female.


I wish everyone didn't hate me that much.

[CantBeTamed]

I Cant Corrupt That LOL

[Sith Lord 13]

I wish for no wish to ever be corrupted.

[Magus]

Granted, they are now defiled.

I wish I was could swim.

[CantBeTamed]

granted not a shark starts chasing you

i wish i still had my belly pierced

[Death]

It ends up getting infected.

I wish that there were no meteors.

[CantBeTamed]

the all crash to earth at once

i wish i could be rich

[Death]

Everyone else ends up even richer making you worse off and creating mass inflation.

I wish that the world didn't orbit the sun at an angle (meaning we have a signle season).

[Sith Lord 13]

The act of removing the tilt throws the earth out of orbit and we slowly drift away from the sun, until we all freeze to death. Nice job getting everybody killed.

I wish for all existence everywhere to cease.

[Death]

Everyone and everyone goes, with the exception of you, the Earth (including its animals and wildlife), and the sun leaving you completely and utterly alone.

I wish that stars could 'live' forever.

[CantBeTamed]

the stars over crowed the universe and destroy everything

i wish i was married to justin bieber lol

[Sith Lord 13]

I'm pretty sure you corrupted that for me.

I wish to rule over the perfect world.

[Contra]

Okay, but you have to deal with the invaders from Mars.

I wish I could run very fast, like a superhero.

[Magus]

Granted, but you can't perceive time accurately during your "runs"

I wish I never had carpal tunnel syndrome.

[Death]

Now all your family have it instead.

I wish that all computer and console games had no bugs.

[Magus]

Granted, but the electronic boards and chips are malfunctioned.

I wish I had the original cover *rare* version of Neuromancer.

[Contra]

Got it, but the cover is tainted.

I wish I had even better grades.

[CantBeTamed]

Granted But You Get Kicked Out Of School For Being Too Smart

I Wish Michael Jackson Was Still Alive And I Got To Go To The THIS IS IT Tour

[jake_97]

you go to the tour and you get shanked in a riot

i wish my grades were better

[Magus]

Granted, but you became nerd.

I wish I was a nerd.

[Death]

Granted, but all the dim slackers who know you get all jealous of your superior intelect and tease you.

I wish that everyone was good.

[CantBeTamed]

Greanted The Whole World Goes Insane From Not Having Crimes The Police Get Shut Down And Crime Starts Again

[Magus]

I wish I can be the Human Spider.

[mexa]

Granted, you become too small and get crushed afterwards.

I wish I was loved by everyone.

[Magus]

Granted, now 1/10 of those who loves you will try to eat you...

I wish I meet Hannibal Lecter.

[CantBeTamed]

Granted He Eats You

I Want My Ipod To Charge

[Kuervo]

granted but ur iPod gets charged to much and it burns

i wish i was famous

[Death]

You become famous for a bad reason.

I wish that we knew everything we learned at school from birth.

[Kuervo]

granted but ur head wud get too big from so much info,

i wish i wasnt so lazt

[Jagador]

Granted, but you became too active in outdoor activites and broke your legs

I wish i could fly!! lololz

[CantBeTamed]

granted you fall out of the sky

i wish i had a cig

[hrecknoall]

you get a cig...then get lung cancer and die...:/

I wish I could travel back in time

[DrWho]

You Travel Back In Time To The Ice Age

I wish to change nothing!

[hrecknoall]

you change nothing...but this backfires and nothing in your world changes, meaning that you're stuck in the same moment forever (not great, but best I could some up with)

I wish my head would stop hurting :/

[Magus]

Granted, now it is your heart that's hurting.

I wish I had William Gibson's Sprawl Trilogy novels.

[DrWho]

You Get Them, But You Stole Them. So Now The Police Are After You.

I Wish To Continue On With My Life The Way It Is

[CantBeTamed]

something eventually goes wrong and you wanna change your life

i Wish I Could Get My Nose Job

[misery_business]

You get a nose job - then your nose stops working after a day.

I wish I had another evanescence cd !

[Jagador]

Granted... its smashed into a million pieces

I wish i had a new pet..=D

[hrecknoall]

You get a new pet...but the pet is a lion that eat you :/
I wish I was with a special someone :)

[CantBeTamed]

you find that special someone and they get hit by a bus like in mean girls and they end up with a fractured spine

i wish i had gotten to see michael jackson in concert

[Death]

Granted, but the stage collapsed and he injured himself in the process making him unable to perform.

I wish that snow wasn't cold.

[Judas]

Granted, but the snow burns you to death (like your name) XD

I wish that you could control erections.

[Death]

The control you exert has an annoying side effect involving shrinking your penis to less than an inch long.

I wish that my wish will not be corrupted.

[Magus]

Granted, you are now a paradox.

I wish I get a copy of Count Zero with the trilogy cover.

[that kid]

You get it but Nazis invade your home and burn it.

I wish I could travel through time.

[misery_business]

You can time travel but you go way into the past and you have to live your life all over again.

I wish I had a bigger room.

[curiousteen]

ur wish came true and it was so big it cushed u.

[Death]

I wish that my penis was twice its length.

[CaliKid24]

ur penis grows twice its length and then a bear rips it off.

i wish i had a car.

[misery_business]

You get a car then you drive off a bridge and die....

I wish I had a green day shirt :)!!

[Skeln]

You get a shirt with pics of Justin Beiber and Lady Gaga

I wish I had a labtop instead of sharing a computer with my mom.

[Death]

Your laptop's hardrive breaks one day after the warranty expires.

I wish that I could turn indivisible at will.

[Skeln]

Congratz, you become a mutant freak, with the power to turn invisible, that everyone rejects forever more and are lony and by yourself for the rest of your life. You can't even own a pet because they somehow always kill themselves because their owner's a freakazoid mutant.

I wish I could come up with better corruptions.

[huginnmuninn]

granted but everybody hates you for it and kills you
i wish i had a banana

[Magus]

Granted, but it is rotten.

I wish I have the Sprawl Trilogy, and Snow Crush as extra books.

[Alfred Pennyworth]

Granted, but your house burns down the next day and the books are destroyed.

I wish that someone would finally tell my sister off and beat the crap out of her.

[misery_business]

She gets beat up then your parents blame you and they throw you out the house you now live on the streets :)

I wish to have my old PE teacher next year when i go back to school!

[Enternamehere]

Granted, but over the summer you teacher turned into an uncaring sadist.

I wish that I didn't have Crohn's disease.

[Death]

It goes away, only to be replaced by pneumonia.

I wish that I was immune to disease.

[Skeln]

You are now affected with every virus known to man.

I wish I could go skydiving.

[Alfred Pennyworth]

you go skydiving, but your parachute fails and you fall 1000 feet onto a crowded highway.

I wish that i had a good graphics card.

[Enternamehere]

You get a good graphics card, but it's incompatible with your system and you get cancer.

I wish I knew The Doctor's name from "Doctor Who".

[Insanity Fair]

Granted, but sadly no one cares.

I wish I was less irritable.

[Alfred Pennyworth]

a guy comes to teach you how to be less irritable, but he irritates you so much that you stab him in the eye with his own pen, and you go to jail.

I wish that I could never get hurt and not feel any pain.

[welcome_to_chaos]

granted...but u never feel any happyness eather

i wish for a cat

[Ender]

Granted... but its got really nasty, uncurable diseases

I want a hug :D

[welcome_to_chaos]

granted...but then a homeless man beats u up and steals all ur money


i want my erin back T-T

[misery_business]

granted but he/she/it (i dunnoe what it is lol) Eats YOU!

I wish i could go to a 30 seconds to mars concert !!!

[huginnmuninn]

granted but a plane crashes and kills everyone at the concert

i wish i had a genie

[welcome_to_chaos]

granted...but he rages havoc on your life

i wish i had erin

[misery_business]

Granted but then you lose her again. btw what is or who is erin ?

I wish chloe was my girlfriend :P

[Ender]

She was, but then she left you for some other hottie.

I want an iPhone 4.

[misery_business]

Granted, then it blows up :P

I wish my beautiful PE teacher would make me her favourite next year in her class :D

[that kid]

You become her favorite but everyone else hates you.

I wish I wasn't moving.

[misery_business]

Granted, but everyone you know moves away.

And tbh i don't care if everyone hates me if she likes me :D

I wish I could watch shutter island!!

[that kid]

Granted but the movie makes you go crazy. (Good movie by the way)

I wish I discovered Atlantis.

[misery_business]

Granted, then you get stuck there alone and you go crazy

I wish i could mee Leonardo Dicaprio <3

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

Granted, but he thinks you're annoying : D

I wish I had a boyfriend

[Ender]

Granted, but he cheats on you.

I wish my migrane would go away.

[misery_business]

granted then you get exited jump around and brake your arm.

[huginnmuninn]

i wish i was perfect in every way possible

[misery_business]

Granted but everyone hates you now.

I wish hayley williams was my girl friend ;)

[huginnmuninn]

granted she goes crazy and kills you
i wish i had some m&ms

[misery_business]

granted then you choke on one and die

I wish I could sing

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

Granted but you can only sing this. (http://leekspin.com/)

I wish I could play trumpet better v.v

[Ender]

granted, but your trumpet breaks

i wish i could move out of this damn house.

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

(FFF my trumpet's pretty much broken anyways <.<)
Granted, but now you live on the street

I wish I had a coke

[enjoying_my_insanity]

granted but the can is filled with pepsi :)

i wish i could teleport

[Ender]

granted, but you can only teleport to a jail cell

I wish for a new bed

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

Granted, but it gives you horrible back pain

I wish my room wasn't so messy

[Kaya]

It gets clean, but you find an ant hill under your bed.


I wish for a new laptop.

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

Granted, but it gets kidnapped by aliens
I wish I had pizza

[Ender]

Granted but it has anchovies.

I wish for a good friend.

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

Granted but they move to Antartica, with no internet, phone, or postal service.
I wish I didn't have to do homework

[TheFame]

Your homework does you, you are now not a virgin.

I wish i was famoouss!

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

Granted but you are only a one hit wonder

I wish I had ice cream