Lost friends when I came out

[Sammerz]

I can't believe this is the first thing I talk about here but here it is. I came out last week. Some of my "friends" just left me. They couldn't believe I was gay. they acted like I had a disease or was mentally insane. I don't want to be treated any different. There's nothing different about me!!!!!!! It's so fucking bullshit! I have one gay friend that's really helping me. I'm so lucky to have him. At least all my friends didn't dump me. It isn't all bad.

To John: You were one of my best friends. We almost never got mad at each other. You told me some of the most private things about yourself. You trusted me like that. WHY DO YOU HATE ME NOW!!!!!!!! You'll never see this, but I loved you like a brother. Why? Do you know what you did to my heart when you did that?

I had to get this off my chest. Sorry you all had to see it. I'm sad and I'm angry. It doesn't make sense to me.

[Wafflenado]

Well for me, I was never very good at hiding it, so most of my friends kind of assumed I was gay. I guess that's why they were all okay with it. I'm sorry to hear about that :/

[BuryYourFlame]

Part of growing up is realising who your true friends are, inevitably this also means realising who the shit people are. It sounds cliche but anyone who would abandon you like that is not someone that you want as a friend.
Focus on the good friends that you do have and focus on being comfortable with yourself for now.

[Sammerz]

Well for me, I was never very good at hiding it, so most of my friends kind of assumed I was gay. I guess that's why they were all okay with it. I'm sorry to hear about that :/

Thanks waffle.

Part of growing up is realising who your true friends are, inevitably this also means realising who the shit people are. It sounds cliche but anyone who would abandon you like that is not someone that you want as a friend.
Focus on the good friends that you do have and focus on being comfortable with yourself for now.

It's weird because I'm good. I'm really ok. It's just I get angry when I think about John, what he did. I feel like he betrayed me.

[SethfromMI]

I am sorry to hear that happened man. but if they are going to leave you just because you came out, then they were not really true friends to begin with. still, it is a major bummer

[Meh Guy]

The fact that they left you because you're Gay means they're not good friends to begin with. Now, you say you aren't any different and don't want to be treated differently, but you unfortunately lost that when you came out. That's what some people are going to be like. You have every reason to be treated like a normal person but to some people, you aren't a normal person. My advice is just try and get those "friends" off your mind and move on to bigger and better things. It's a good thing you have that one friend to help you out.

[Hudor]

Oh well I had a friend I considered very close too. Like we were best friends but he couldn't accept I wasn't straight and did some mean shit. For some time I tried patching our friendship but left it eventually because at the end of the day its true if he can't accept me as I am he isn't a good enough friend( no matter how close I felt to him).
My advice to you would be to stop thinking about John too and move on.

[Babs]

This might not make you feel any better right now, but be glad those assholes are out of your life. Coming out of the closet is an opportunity to filter out the assholes among your friends. You deserve so much better then those people. You deserve people who love and accept you, and soon enough you'll find those people.

[Vermilion]

Like others have said I'm sorry you've lost friends for being honest with them it couldn't of been easy coming out. They might just need time to come to terms with it not that it affects them at all. This is one reason I ain't told my friends or family that I'm bi, I'm not afraid of losing friends but being treated differently. If they truly care they will come back.

[ImCoolBeans]

I'm so sorry that your friends left you after your coming out. You put a lot of trust into them, and they betrayed you -- but that should show you who your real friends actually are. It's not going to be an easy journey, but things will become easier with time. I wish you the best, and this site will support you in any way that you need.

[Sammerz]

Thanks everyone for helping me. I really mean it. I have some friends that accept me for who I am. My brothers accept me for who I am too. I'm trying not to let the others get to me. It just isn't easy.

[SethfromMI]

Thanks everyone for helping me. I really mean it. I have some friends that accept me for who I am. My brothers accept me for who I am too. I'm trying not to let the others get to me. It just isn't easy.

yea I know. it is hard to be rejected by those who should be some of the most accepting. it will get a little easier over time, even though rejection can still be painful

[Vermilion]

Thanks everyone for helping me. I really mean it. I have some friends that accept me for who I am. My brothers accept me for who I am too. I'm trying not to let the others get to me. It just isn't easy.

I think I speak for most people when i say your more than welcome. Its not an easy thing to come out. I've only been a member for 3 months I think but one thing you'll find is everyone is so friendly and helpful, you'll always get support here.:)

[Sammerz]

yea I know. it is hard to be rejected by those who should be some of the most accepting. it will get a little easier over time, even though rejection can still be painful

I think I speak for most people when i say your more than welcome. Its not an easy thing to come out. I've only been a member for 3 months I think but one thing you'll find is everyone is so friendly and helpful, you'll always get support here.:)

I mean this when I say it, reading these make me smile with a tear. :)

[Sammerz]

John texted me a little while ago. He said he's sorry!!!!!!!! I'm dancing inside!!!!!!! :metal::yeah::D:P:yummy::)

[CosmicNoodle]

Ye, coming out's shit like that, but at least now you know who your real friends are.

[runner 19]

I can't believe this is the first thing I talk about here but here it is. I came out last week. Some of my "friends" just left me. They couldn't believe I was gay. they acted like I had a disease or was mentally insane. I don't want to be treated any different. There's nothing different about me!!!!!!! It's so fucking bullshit! I have one gay friend that's really helping me. I'm so lucky to have him. At least all my friends didn't dump me. It isn't all bad.

To John: You were one of my best friends. We almost never got mad at each other. You told me some of the most private things about yourself. You trusted me like that. WHY DO YOU HATE ME NOW!!!!!!!! You'll never see this, but I loved you like a brother. Why? Do you know what you did to my heart when you did that?

I had to get this off my chest. Sorry you all had to see it. I'm sad and I'm angry. It doesn't make sense to me.Hey I'm here for you if you need. I know how it is when I came out they said they were okay with it but they don't ever want to be around me. Like I had one straight friend who was so cool about it and like such an amazing friend but then I lost him in a car accident and now I don't have really any friends that support me. I have this one other bi friend who supports me cuz he is so I'm lucky to have an amazing friend like him that accepts me. But I know I don't know why people act like it's a big deal

[Zachary G]

It isnt an easy thing, but as you get older the easier it will be for you to cope with situations like that. but what you need to do is to focus on yourself and reinforcing the friendships that you do have.

[Sammerz]

Hey I'm here for you if you need. I know how it is when I came out they said they were okay with it but they don't ever want to be around me. Like I had one straight friend who was so cool about it and like such an amazing friend but then I lost him in a car accident and now I don't have really any friends that support me. I have this one other bi friend who supports me cuz he is so I'm lucky to have an amazing friend like him that accepts me. But I know I don't know why people act like it's a big deal

It isnt an easy thing, but as you get older the easier it will be for you to cope with situations like that. but what you need to do is to focus on yourself and reinforcing the friendships that you do have.

I'm lucky because John figured out he was being a dick and just apologized to me today. I can't tell you how happy that makes me feel. But people are still talking about me. Nobody is bullying me, so I'm glad about that.

I realllllllly appreciate you guys taking the time to read my thing and comment. I actually feel choked up right now because of it. There's so many good people out there. I love you all! :wub:

[fiftycents]

If you're not losing friends, you're not growing up.

[Kiogaout]

Yes , you are right , part of growing up is to lose a bunch of friends and find others , but the worst part is when you don't have anybody that cares about you , that is the moment when I cry and fell bad for myself

[Andyyy95]

I can't believe this is the first thing I talk about here but here it is. I came out last week. Some of my "friends" just left me. They couldn't believe I was gay. they acted like I had a disease or was mentally insane. I don't want to be treated any different. There's nothing different about me!!!!!!! It's so fucking bullshit! I have one gay friend that's really helping me. I'm so lucky to have him. At least all my friends didn't dump me. It isn't all bad.

To John: You were one of my best friends. We almost never got mad at each other. You told me some of the most private things about yourself. You trusted me like that. WHY DO YOU HATE ME NOW!!!!!!!! You'll never see this, but I loved you like a brother. Why? Do you know what you did to my heart when you did that?

I had to get this off my chest. Sorry you all had to see it. I'm sad and I'm angry. It doesn't make sense to me.

Hey,

As bluntly as this sounds, they really aren't/weren't your friends if they can't accept who you are as a person or even be happy for you.

Many congratulations for coming out though, it can't have been easy, but it was a very brave thing to do, and made you realise who really does matter to you in your life!

As long as you're happy with the way you are, then that's all that matters really right? Because one day, I'm sure you'll successfully seek happiness!

All the best,
Andy